One of my best buds just died...how to handle the mental pain?

Question

Yesterday, my friend was on his bycicle, and he got hit from a truck that came from over the hill he was at the bottom at...I was with him...and I called 911, they came here ASAP and worked on him for about 30 minutes... but he died. He died right in front of my eyes, and I don't know what to do. I feel so horrible, and can't get it out of my head. Any advice, please?

www.chippewa.com the photo for today and the story is right under it.

http://www.chippewa.com/articles/2007/06/13/news/893x.txt

Here's the story if you want to read it.

Answer 1

I'm sorry for your loss.

Time is the only thing that will heal you. For now, just try to focus on the good times. Rather than dwelling on the fact he's gone, try to be grateful for the time you got to know him.

Answer 2

I'm so sorry about your friend and that you had to experience something like that. I know this phrase may be run down and corny but sometimes things happen for a reason, yes it was an accident but if he was that banged up to pass away, what kind of quality of life would he have had if he would have lived. Thats what I keep thinking to myself when I think about my dad and when he passed. I also work for a psychiatrist and you don't have to be crazy to see one, some people just need someone to talk to and sometimes it helps if its not family or a friend. I'm sure everything will work out for you. It does get easier to deal with as time goes on and try to remember all of the goodtimes you had with him and how blessed both of you are for having each other as good friends because good friends are very hard to find and some people don't get that. If there is one thing death teaches you is that life is short and you should live and love with no regrets.

Answer 3

Man, thats rough, I'm really sorry. Anyhow, try talking to family and other friends about him. Take some time off and just relax, but while relaxing you might also want to do stuff to get your mind off it (read a book, watch a favorite tv program, whatever).

I'm afraid only time is gonna heal this wound, but you will move on and day by day you'll think of him and the accident a bit less.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Talk to someone you trust. It could be a teacher, a friend, a parent, a priest - but talk. It was a horrible experience for you, and you'll need their support to get through this, but you can get through this.

If you find after a few months that it's not getting better, or if for whatever reason talking doesn't help for at least a little while, consider getting grief counseling.

Good luck, and gods bless.

Answer 5

You have had a traumatic experience, you should feel horrible, anyone would. You need to experience the grief and the pain in order to get past it. Cry, curse, beat up a pillow, do whatever it takes to express your grief. Don't try to get it out of your head, it will always be there, with time the pain will fade, but the memory never will, it is a part of you now and you need to feel it, accept it and express it before you can move past it.

Answer 6

I read about the article that you posted. I feel so sorry for you and my condolences goes out to his immediate family, close friends and relatives. He will be included in my prayers as I attend mass every Sunday.

May the eternal repose of his soul and the souls of all the Faithful Departed through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.

Keep your chin up, my friend. I know it's not easy when a great friend of yours has passed away.But, I know that he'll always be there, in your heart, and he'll be watching over you at all times. May God bless you, Levi and his entire family always.

Answer 7

I'm sorry you had to go through that incident. It must be very painful. If I were you, I would take a CPR/First Aid course in memory of your bud. Hopefully you will never need to use what you will learn, and if you do find yourself in another similar position, you will be better equipped to handle the situation, instead of feeling like you are just standing idly by.

Be strengthened.

Answer 8

I'm really sorry about your friend. It seems you really need to talk to someone, This will be something you never forget, but it dosen't mean you have to live with the pain, or guilt forever.
I can simply tell you that this is when family can really help out just by listening. you need to cry get it out of your system you'll feel like a big weight has been lifted off of you. otherwise get some counseling please... I wish you and his family the best..

Answer 9

OK, you need to tell your parents that you are having a hard time. It is perfectly normal for you to be feeling this way. Even rescuers who do this all the time have this problem.

Please tell your parents to call the local rescue company and see if you can talk to them, or if they can refer you to their Critical Incident Counselor. If they can't, then please have them call a counselor who specialises in post-traumatic stress.

You are not at fault. You called 911. You did everything you could possibly do. Please ask your parents to find you the counselor you need. It is critical that someone talks to you in the next day or so.

They can help you stop the video loop in your head.

Answer 10

Few weeks ago. My uncle died. I understand the loss of a love one all too clearly. The way I got threw was been strong during the initial shock to help the family get threw, but afterwards don't think of him gone. Instead, think of all the fun you had togather. The pain will never go away. It will always be apart of you. The people we run into shape our lives in ways only they can do. Respect his memory and he will be immortal and nothing can take that away from you.