What does it mean to be "Socially Awkward"?

Question

Many people say that homeschoolers are socially awkward. What does it mean? Does it mean that we are shy, or wierd? Its NOT just homeschoolers, but also people in public schools as well...

Answer 1

When I hear the term, I think of the kid who is sitting by himself in the cafeteria of the public school. When people approach, trying to be friendly, he looks away and doesn't really know how to respond. I think of the kid who answers a question in class and it is abstract and off the subject. The kids laugh, the teacher may make a rude remark, and the class continues. That student won't make the same mistake, so he keeps silent the rest of the year.
I think of the kid on the bus, who is different, wears thick glasses, and is extremely quiet. Every once in a while, he ventures to join in on the fun, only to be put down with names of "four eyes" or "ET" (alien). These are the ones that come to my mind when I hear the term.
No, we can't protect our children from every pain and hurt in life. We can help guide them and make sure they are secure enough to face the 'knocks' of life. Most adults I've worked with are not outwardly cruel to each other., but children are. There is nothing wrong with guiding our young, individually, and helping them to know how to act socially.
By my answer, you realize that I do not think home schoolers are socially awkward. I think it is a myth that was created by people who do not know home school families.

Answer 2

The idea that homeschoolers are all socially awkward is based on faulty logic at best. This is a proven myth. There have been several studies done that show homeschoolers to be just as well-socialized as non-homeschoolers. The only difference in one study was that the homeschooled kids were more likely to be in positions of leadership.

I would imagine that most people who make the claim that homeschool kids are socially awkward don't have a set definition. I would guess that whatever a known homeschooler does in a social setting could be called socially awkward. If he's shy, it's because he's homeschooled. If he's outgoing, maybe he doesn't know boundaries. If he's in a bad mood or deep in thought, he just hasn't been socialized enough. Really any kind of behavior can be interpreted as social awkwardness when you've already decided that someone's socially awkward. It's just human nature to interpret what you observe with the knowledge you already have--even if the knowledge you already have is wrong.

My question is: have any of these people who've labeled all homeschoolers as social misfits been to a public school? I grew up in them and I taught in them. I would think it would take one stroll down a school hallway to realize that a huge percentage of kids are socially awkward to say the least.

Answer 3

It means they are shy and quiet and don't know how to behave in a group. Guess all the homeschoolers I know didn't get the memo that they were to act like that, if they had my daughters cell phone bill would be a lot cheaper. As for the person who claimed you aren't like that if you went to public school first, I gotta say you are wrong. My younger dd never went to school and she is very social. In fact, she is more social than my dd who went to school until 4th grade. I have met 4 adults who were homeschooled their entire life and they are all extremely social people. Saying all homeschoolers are socially awkward is like saying all public schooled kids are strung out hooligans with no respect for anyone. Obviously neither statement is true.

Destinee- On a personal note, I noticed you seem to be really worried about how other kids perceive you. I just want to say, if they truly perceive you in a negative light just because you are homeschooled they aren't worth your time. Find some good friends and forget about the idiots who cant get past stereotypes.

Answer 4

Having two children with autism, i laugh in the face of those who think homeschooling children don't know how to socialize. NO....kids with autism don't know how to socialize, homeschoolers just choose not to act like idiots in order to fit in.

An example...today at the library, we had an awesome 'MuggleFest', hundreds of people there. My three yo and five yo did just fine playing with children they had never met before in their lives. Shared age appropriate information, took turns, stood up for themselves and for others. Some public schooled children, however, were much more comfortable throwing blocks, screaming and running like crazy around the book shelves. How socially awkward for their parents. And completely inappropriate for the library.

My 12 yo with aspergers was much less awkward with typical peers in the teen section of the library, than those who had to prove a point by talking too much, disrespecting the volunteers who were helping, or pulling books out of the shelves and leaving them laying everywhere. THAT is socially awkward.

It's not just the library, it's the park, the mall, the arcades, walmart, the lake....I see plenty of socially awkward teens from public school, and some from homeschooling. Teens in general are awkward. It takes a rare gem (Nimrod) to come online as an adult and be so socially awkward by judging, condemning and posting misinformation.

Answer 5

Is it home schoolers or not? Do you mean to say teenagers?

It simply refers to the ambiguous line between child and adult. Eventually you will put away childish things for good and become an adult.

Socially awkward is how I would describe a teen that looks old enough to vote and drive but may actually skateboard and prefer to hang out with friends all day. No one understands that, teens often have no apparent goals like the rest of the working world.

Answer 6

It's the words that people use when they are trying to say that homeschoolers don't know how to act in social situations! It's a common misconception that homeschoolers have no interaction socially; therefore, they do not know how to interact with others.

Answer 7

Definition:
I think they are saying that in social places (or in public), one seems uncomfortable and it shows. Or, another way to they may be presenting it is "not fitting in". Either way, it doesn't sound like something you should pay much attention to because it is an insult to a person's character. But, here is the definition of "awkward" and "social" is the public:

1. embarrassing: embarrassing and requiring great tact or skill to resolve.
example: "I find myself in an awkward situation."

2. difficult or uncomfortable to use: difficult to use because requiring the body to be moved into an uncomfortable position
example: I find the gear shift very awkward to use when I move the seat forward.

3. performed gracelessly: performed in a way that lacks grace and looks uncomfortable; walked with an awkward gait.

Answer 8

I went to public school 1st through 12th. I was socially awkward until I got a job. I was an extremely shy kid- to the point of being nearly terrified- and the public school culture only made it worse. My voice was quiet so every time I did venture to answer a question in class I was made fun of for not being loud enough. And if the answer wasn't correct it was even worse. Things like this kept me in-confident and quiet.

Answer 9

You're right! I'm sick of people thinking that ONLY homeschoolers are, as they say, "Socially awkward". I went to public school for 5 years, and there were some "odd" kids there too. Just because we don't care about the stupid things that are drilled into other kids' minds, doesn't mean that we're "weird". Sorry to go chasing rabbit trails, Socially awkward means that you don't quite exactly "fit in", in a way.

Answer 10

When non-home schoolers make the statement that our children are socially awkward, they mean that our children are not on the same social plane as conventional schooled youngsters.
Our children, or at least most of them speak proper English, are more mature, and can interact equally with young, old, as well as every age in between.
They can hold a conversation on a variety of topic's from politics to the weather ^_^, and do not live in the "teen box" of dude, duh, and wow's.
I guess not coming down to that level may indeed seem socially awkward, but for whom?