I am scared of having sex.?

Question

I am 20yo and i have never had sex before. Any advice on how to deal with your first time?

Answer 1

SCARED ? THEN WHY HAVE IT ?

Answer 2

Hi Tom. It seems you are a guy, so I'm going to keep it real with you. When you was around 12,13,or 14 years old you had wet dreams right. and didn't you get hard-ons for know apparrent reason and thought you just had to pee? The feeling behind those it's just like having sex, it's just 3 times the charm.
If you're saying you don't know what to do when it comes to having sex. Try this method, foreplay ( that's the kissing, hugging , and touching associated with preparing the emotions for sex. make sex fun, try licking whip cream off your partner or make a fruit salad. The point is when you and your partner build those emotions together before sex happens, you both can explore eachother, and talk to eachother about where it feels good and how you like it. Before long, hopefully with protection, you'll be making passionate whoopy.

Answer 3

First time should definitely be with someone you trust and like. It is wonderful to have the first time with someone you love etc but some of us are not always that lucky, so I suggest someone you trust, like and fancy is a good start. Trust is important beause you do not want someone leading you into something you may not be ready to do. Also, someone you trust and like will take things at your pace and not make you feel too nervous. Most importantly though, don't have sex because you feel you have to because you are a certain age, but have sex because you want to and feel like it. When you are ready it will happen naturally, let it happen, go with the flow, with your desire and don't think about it too much. Oh, and please please please USE A CONDOM because so many young people forget this nowadays but HIV and AIDS still exist and are deadly. So be safe and have fun! ;-)))) Sex is about having fun!

Answer 4

well.. i ve been havin sex since i was 14.. listen.. there is no right or wrong way when u have sex.. there are not things u can do to make it good or bad.. sex is something that comes naturally.. its like kissing.. u feel anxious in the start but the moment u actually do it u feel so wonderful.. sex connects u in a special way with ur special someone and believe me the pleasure of having sex is one of the most incredible things u can ever feel!! but still, even if we re talking about a one night stand u still shouldnt be afraid.. sex is something physical.. as i said b4, it comes naturally!!

Answer 5

Everyone is scared the first time no matter the age. But someone gave me some good advice if your scared then maybe your not ready or maybe your not sure she is the one you want to be with. but take your time talk to her about it and if she loves you she will be understanding. And from experience the 2nd time is always better. Not sure if that applies to men and women though sorry. But enjoy it and explore.

Answer 6

thats a good thing in a way bro because it means you havnt found the right person yet if your scared to have sex with someone and need to think about it all then its not the right time for you to do it if when you are with some one and youv been with them for quit a while and all of a sudden you start getting it on and without thinking you start to have sex you know its a winner you know your ready and shes the right one so all you have to do man is be cool and calm about it and just wait for your time to come my friend because it will come trust me

Answer 7

make sure he is the right guy because u waited this long you might as well do it with a nice guy who will be there for you later. Do not expect it to be wonderful because it is ur first time and you probably dont know what sexually pleases you. It doesn't have to be like in the movies. I mean candles and romance are great but dont have all these expectations because you might be let down. I'd say wait till ur married and if not then do everything you imagined ur first time to be like. Dont wait for the guy to do them.

Answer 8

Wait until you are married and try to find someone who is also a virgin so you two can learn together.

Much of what you are afraid of is someone laughing at you so wait until you find that special someone who is willing to wait and be with you and enjoy the beauty of what God gave us to enjoy as husband and wife,

not as acquaintences or boyfriends / girlfriends.

My husband and I both were virgins and have never regretted it, especially since we are Christians which made it more of a priority in our minds and hearts, as we wanted our lives to be pleasing to God, not to men and women upon this earth.

Galatians 5:18-20 (New King James Version)

18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law (of man).
19 Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies,

Answer 9

Communication is definitely the key, loads of people get nervous first time so its not unusual, theres no need to be scared you really don't know what you are missing. You need to be with someone that you trust, it'll make it easier for you to talk to them and will help you relax more.

Answer 10

Well as your first time forms your believes and opinions on the act of sex and how to treat the opposite sex I would suggest dong it with someone you love.If its with someone you love it will come naturally as you are just expressing what you feel, follow your instincts and aim on pleasing your partner.If your first time is with someone you dont care about more is going to be expected of you as that person isnt going to respect that its your first time and that could lead to you feeling rejected.Just relax it will be fine.

Answer 11

It can be scary.

One of my first times was easy since I had someone more aggressive than me...she did all the work. ***Funny, I asked her why it was wet*** I never touched one of those again.

Another first was easy because he turned me on and we just clicked. I knew what boys liked.

My suggestion is to wait till you are married or truly committed. I think it is great you are 20 and still a virgin.