I feel that his best friend whom he grew up with would be more appropriate. Also, his dad is just now finally accepting me as "good enough" for his son after five years. He is nice to me but before my fiance had made it clear by having a talk with him, he thought that my fiance was making a bad decision w/o really knowing me.
2007-06-05 17:08:15 · 11 answers · asked by LucyInTheSky 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Okay, my fiance is saying that it would mean a great deal to his dad and that he doesn't want to hurt the two friends that he wants to choose.
2007-06-05 17:22:26 · update #1
Alot of fathers are like that, it's good he's finally starting to accept you. Maybe one of them would like to go online and register to be an offciant instead, and marry you two, since they are both special to your fiance.
2007-06-05 17:14:49 · answer #1 · answered by Jamie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's perfectly "appropriate" to have one's father as a best man. If a son is really close to his father, then I think it's a fine idea. On the other hand, just doing it to be nice to a father is superfluous; the dad will be in the wedding anyways.
I understand the tension added by your relationship with his dad. But in my opinion, this should be left to the judgment of your fiance. If he admits that he really wants to choose a friend is thinking about choosing his dad to avoid hurting feelings of the not-chosen friend, then tell him to grow a pair and man up. Any friend, or dad for that matter, should understand. But if he really feels close to his dad and its what your fiance really wants, then objecting would appear (and be) pretty self-centered.
2007-06-07 21:43:17 · answer #2 · answered by jonny q man 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd want someone beside me that did not need to take five years to "accept" my partner.
Have both his friends stand beside him. Then have the best man be the one he's been friends with the longest, and just let them both know it was a hard decision. Or decide by height. If your guy is tall and the other two are varying heights, do it tallest to shortest.
But, I would not put his dad up there.
Talk about it with your partner.
2007-06-06 12:44:54 · answer #3 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel really hurt if my finace's dad felt that way about me. REGARDLESS of WHO it was, if they felt I WAS NOT GOOD ENOUGH, I wouldn't want them up there near me while saying my vows anyways. I think your groom should put your feelings before his dad's, then grow up and just pick between the other two "best men". THIS IS YOUR DAY, and your fiance's day. NOT his dad's! It's your day to celebrate your love--- someone who is just starting to accept you should not have such a big role!!!
2007-06-06 00:54:57 · answer #4 · answered by Eternal Love 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is HIS best man. Going along with his decision without putting up a stink could be the first step in proving to your future father-in-law that he was wrong about you. Marriage is about compromise - save your battles for the important stuff.
2007-06-06 00:22:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My brother had our father as his best man and I think it would be a great idea. As far as the way he felt about you...well, he just doesn't know you but time will heal that.
2007-06-06 03:02:03 · answer #6 · answered by Christina D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has your fiance spoken to his best firnd about this issue/If not,i urge him to do so immediately.Explain that its nothing personal,it would just mean so much for his dad to be best man.But anyway,its not tradition for dads to b best men!!
2007-06-06 00:34:07 · answer #7 · answered by missbp1982 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
"just to be nice"?
honestly... if his dad is his best friend, then fair enough, but just to be nice? thats rediculous.
the best man, should be the BEST MAN funnily enough.
tell him to grow up and ask his mate.
2007-06-06 00:19:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its his choice who his best man is. My Grandson had his Grandpa as his best man, and my husband was so honored,.
2007-06-06 00:14:50 · answer #9 · answered by Granny 1 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i understand about you and your future father-in-law having a strained relationship but that is his father and obviously he's close enough to him to want him to be best man. . .think about it
2007-06-06 00:12:56 · answer #10 · answered by Keri Z 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋