My guy and I have been together for about a year and just recently I let him move in with me for financial reasons. We were spending ALL of our time together anyways so it just made more sense. The other day he had his email up and I decided to look at it (not every single email), but a couple in particular stood out to me. There was a few from some chick that he was trying to meet up with and have sex but then he told her he couldn't do it at that time. There was another one about an ad placed to meet transgender/transexual women, placed by a male around the same age as him (most likely he posted it). So I asked him about it and his first response was "where are you coming from with this?" Then he acted like he had an attitude for me checking his email. Needless to say we didn't really talk about it because I was too upset and just walked away and he sat in the room and continued to play video games and then went to sleep. I don't trust him and he just moved in, what to do?
2007-06-05 11:24:15 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Technically, we are not bf/gf, but out of respect for each other, we said if we became interested in having sex with someone else, we would tell the other person beforehand. I guess since I haven't been interested in sex with anyone else, I thought the same would go for him.
2007-06-05 11:37:02 · update #1
Ask him to remove himself from your home. Even if he hasn't met this girl for sex - he is planning too. Besides betraying your trust - he is putting you at risk for STD's and "Jerry moments" (the kind of crap you see on the Jerry Springer show)
If you are not ready to kick him to the curb you need to talk to him about what you saw and how you feel. If you don't think your going to be able trust him again - save yourself some major grief and make him leave now. If he says he has nowhere to go - tell him he should have thought of that before he started talking to the girl on-line. His not having a place to go is his problem - don't make it yours.
2007-06-05 11:34:25 · answer #1 · answered by andijxo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first off. the meet transgender/transexual women could have just been spam. And he is right reading his email is not right, it shows you didn't trust him before he moved in, in my opinion that is or else you never would have looked...
I would suggest you re-think this relationship, because usually where there is smoke there is fire.. As he has just moved in, I would have him move out and soon, not a good way to start any relationship.. try to get a room-mate to share living expenses as financial reasons are not a good way to start off any relationship (though it helps) but really shouldn't it be love? and Trust comes with Love... Good Luck to you..
2007-06-05 18:37:29 · answer #2 · answered by Rebel 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Moving together for financial reasons is not a good idea. You need to commit to each other. You don't need his kind of trouble. Tell him it isn't working out, let him move out and you move on. Learn to respect yourself and don't settle for a jerk . . .ever. . .You may have assumed something that the two of you didn't agree to. Better to have a big committment before living with someone. Isn't it amazing what you can find out about someone when you do move in together. That's why you really need to get to know someone. Count this as a learning experience.
2007-06-05 18:31:37 · answer #3 · answered by towanda 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask him to move out. You should not continue a relationship with someone that has character flaws that you can not accept. If you had intended on getting married, please remember that if there is something you do not like before you get married, it is NOT going to get any better afterwards. If you date someone in hopes of changing them, you are setting yourself up for dissappointment.
Kick him to the curb fast. Tell him to go live with the Trannys.
2007-06-05 18:29:58 · answer #4 · answered by PK 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, it is like you said, you moved in because finaciaully it was cheaper. well maybe he was thinking the same thing. it is cheaper or him to live with you. maybe he wasnt lookinjg for a reoationship just a booty call. not a relationship or a wife. you are dating not married, so why did you move in together. just cuz it was cheap. you need to boot this guy out and forget about him. he wasnt ready for this relationship and it was a big move for him to move in with you, he is ready to sleep with you but not ready to deal with this and stop chatting or searching for a girl online. i think he is not the right one for you and he has a lot of growing up to do good luck.
2007-06-05 18:39:00 · answer #5 · answered by Christina 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick him out until you're sure that you want to be with him.
That's what I would do anyway..
Honestly, think about how well you know him. Do you mean a lot to each other? How important is this relationship in your life?
Then decide if you want to either:
a) talk to him and hopefully he'll be honest and fess up and change his ways, or
b) kick him out.
2007-06-05 18:28:14 · answer #6 · answered by :Sheila: 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Ask him straight out why is he afraid to talk to you about his fantasies. And if it is more than a fantasy then he should definitely go..........Specially that you don't trust him. But don't just disregard the matter , thinking that' it's going to go away, and that maybe it was nothing or believe him that he is really clueless.
2007-06-05 18:42:52 · answer #7 · answered by virgo_11214 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out your dictionary and find the words for...
So Long it's been nice to know ya...and show him the door.
No more questions asked.
It will NOT get better because he thinks
he is okay in this exploration.
You deserve better.
Don't you?
Good Luck!
2007-06-05 18:28:28 · answer #8 · answered by susieque 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
sorry but it seems like your man has some kind of fetish or something that is making him look else where for pleasure...
if you dont trust him then make him move in w/ another friend of his
you dont deserve a man who hides things from you...
2007-06-05 18:30:00 · answer #9 · answered by Sweetest Chocolate 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him, look , I'm letting you moving in, you have a choice, stop what you are doing , or your out of here. have respect for yourself girl, you were nice to him for letting him move in, and he's doing this to you.
2007-06-05 18:28:57 · answer #10 · answered by kitty 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋