I have a child with a man that is 18 years older than me and we broke up now I have found a guy that is my age

Question

The father of my child is successful and makes good money(he is in the oilfield bussiness) he can be very mean, mentaly and physicaly abusive.. but I never had to worry about anything as far as money went. when we broke up I met a guy that was my age(21) and he is what I have been looking for as far as a relationship, he treats me like im the only woman in the world, no one has ever treated me like he does, I feel in love with him fast...but he lives with his mom and Grandma..I also make as much or more money than he does, and I am not used to that..I do not know what to do..do I get back with a guy who can support me and my child(the father of my child) and take the chance of being unhappy, but have anything and everything I want and need...or do I go with the guy who makes me happpy at heart and no be able to give my son ,everything he needs...I just dont know what to do...HELP

Answer 1

First and foremost, your ex should still be providing support for your child, so that should not be a concern. If he is not you need to take some action. Second- as cliche as it sounds- you can't BUY. love or happiness. Stick with what makes you happy, and where you are treated right. You said if you went back with your ex you would have everything you want and need. REALLY? It sounds like you would not have love or positive attention, or a good role model for your son. All things that you need. Best of luck!

Answer 2

The father of my child is successful and makes good money(he is in the oilfield bussiness) he can be very mean, mentaly and physicaly abusive.. but I never had to worry about anything as far as money went. when we broke up I met a guy that was my age(21) and he is what I have been looking for as far as a relationship, he treats me like im the only woman in the world, no one has ever treated me like he does, I feel in love with him fast...but he lives with his mom and Grandma..I also make as much or more money than he does, and I am not used to that..I do not know what to do..do I get back with a guy who can support me and my child(the father of my child) and take the chance of being unhappy, but have anything and everything I want and need...or do I go with the guy who makes me happpy at heart and no be able to give my son ,everything he needs...I just dont know what to do...HELP

Answer 3

Your son doesn't want u to sacrifice your happiness for his future. If u go back to his father he will realise that, as he grows up and in combination to the bad family environment he will definitely have psychological problems. There are many kids out there saying that it is not money that they want from their parents but love, and still the only thing they get is money. Which do u think is more important? Money or love? U work, so in combination to the money your son's father has to give u, according to the law, u will raise your son perfectly fine. Now, about the other guy. U are more mature as u have more experiences than him. Don't push him too much. Don't depend too much on him, he might let u down without wanting to. Spend time with him, enjoy yourself, love him and if things turn out well and he is still someone u can trust, u two will be together in the future. But for now he is very young for so many responsiblities as a wife and a child, as u were also too young when u had your first family.

Answer 4

You should NOT go back to an abusive relationship. He is the father of your child, so let him show some love in the form of child support. It's the law in every state in the union. Take his money, but don't take his abuse.

As for the new guy: Don't make any commitments right now. You're coming out of a bad relationship, and that is a bad time to commit to anyone besides yourself. Enjoy time with this guy, but let time tell the tale. You are young and so is he; time is on your side. Let it ride, enjoy it, and if it is meant to last, you'll be still enjoying it a year from now. THEN you make whatever decision is necessary.

Answer 5

money can't buy love, and love is the only thing that can buy happiness. If your new guy is only 21, whats to say he won't be sucessful soon, I lived with my parents until I was 21 and didn't hardly make a dime because I was in college, now I'm 24 and make plenty of money to support my wife and daughter because I finished college and got a job.

Also you have to think about your child, would you rather they have lots of toys but feel like a looser because their father hates them, or would you rather they have a loving home where there are some luxuries they don't have?

Deep down you know what to do, Its just hard to turn your back on money.

Answer 6

If you don't know what to do, then do nothing. The father is abusive and you don't need that. The other guy can't support you and you don't need that. So why don't you consider getting the father to pay child support and get yourself in a position to support yourself and your child. Don't be in such a hurry to get all involved in a permanent relationship. The right guy will come along, you just need some patience. So in the mean time, get yourself together. . .

Answer 7

ok first off money dont buy happiness. second you can get child support for your child and it will have everything he needs. third if its money u care about then make ur own and get back with the loser that treats you bad so you can have that but if its happiness that you want stay with the one that is going to give you love first off and i am sure he will make u and your son very happy without buying things, i was once told that the best gift in life you can give a child is love the worst things you can give a child is money the reason why is a child thinks you give them money so you dont have to deal with them and they tend to think you dont love them. so the true question is what makes you happy. money and getting treated like crap or less money but happiness and a man that can love you forever???

Answer 8

I think you just answered your own question by mistake. Anyway,have u tried asking the younger guy to look for a job? As for the father of the baby doesn't he pay child maintenance? for the rest I am sure you can support yourself as you r working right? Always do what your heart tells you to do and as for your son all he really needs is your love and affection.

Answer 9

Money doesn't buy happiness. You need to leave the father of you baby. If he abuses you, then you won't have everything you need. He will abuse your child too, and do you want your child to go through that? I know I wouldn't. Don't do that to your baby. This other man sounds like he will treat you good. God will supply the rest of your needs.

Answer 10

how do you know that the guy who "cant" support you wont be able to later in life? I mean hes only 21 must people dont even start careers these days until after college mwhich for some is like 23 or 24