but i have a football scholarship to notre dame
should i marry her
im 17
2007-06-05 06:40:18 · 52 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If you are too young to be a dad...don't have sex...its as simple as that....im not trying to be rude...but too many young people go out and don't think about the consequences. You should NEVER push a woman for an abortion...and I think its great she won't get one...you both knew what you were doing. Nothing says you have to marry her......that depends on how you feel about her....if you think she is who you want to spend your life with, then you 2 should talk about it, but just beacause she is pregnant does not mean you have to marry her. All you HAVE to do is be there for your child....make sure you are paying child support, make sure you see your child....if anything, you just need to make sure you are in your childs life and supporting your child if you are not ready for marriage.
2007-06-05 06:45:12 · answer #1 · answered by Nikki 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Ok listen why cant you still go to college and help take care of the baby, did you ever ask her what she wanted. How is having a baby going to HURT your football scholarship, its not like having a baby means you are going to loose a leg and cant play football. And if you dont love her you shouldnt marry her unless your love for her is going to last forever.
And if you didnt want this situation to happen then you should have kept your little friend in the pants. Thats your problem is that you didnt use the right head when you were thinking about that. If you were so worried about your football then that is what you should have been focusing on not her chacha. If that was the case then you should not be in this situation
but my answer is that you should think of her feelings i mean this is her kid too. and if you really dont want anything to do with it then get a test and make sure that its yours and then sign your rights over, and if you both dont want it then have it and let a family who does have it. If you have abortion can you honestly live with taking a human beings life just because you wanted to play football?
THINK LONG AND HARD
2007-06-05 07:15:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You Play You Pay....I would not suggest getting married as you will probably end up divorced. Just go to college AND be a part of the baby's life. If you two can get along (financially and mentally) while you are in school, when you are graduated you will be in a much better position to support a child. 4-5 years seems like a long time now, but it will go by fast and when you graduate you will have a beautiful 3-4 year old child who will know who his father is and will love him!
2007-06-05 06:59:21 · answer #3 · answered by Jackie H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speaking from experience:
When I was 17 my girlfriend got pregnant and she decided not to have an abortion. Her and her family decided it would be best to give the baby up for adoption. Although it was a good decision to have the baby over an abortion, in my opinion. (my opinion didn't really matter at the time).
You will have a lifetime of regret if you give your baby up for adoption or at least I have,never seeing him/her ever again knowing they are out there.
Perhaps you will have a few ruff years ahead of you if you decide to keep the baby. In my opinion it is worth raising your child and go to school as well, that is also important.
Good luck in your decision. I wish I had one to make at the time. That doesn't mean you have to marry her btw.
2007-06-05 16:04:20 · answer #4 · answered by Just G 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. That is an old-fashioned idea that a boy should marry a girl if he gets her pregnant. Now, it IS the manly and right thing to do to at least OFFER to help financially as much as you can if she decides to keep the child. Afterall, it IS your child. I understand it's difficult for the guy b/c you really have no say in the decision. It's HER body and she's going to do what she wants to do. But don't let her use the pregnancy to manipulate you. You have a bright future ahead of you and should pursue it. I would only marry her if you truly love her and would've married her even if she weren't pregnant. There are ALOT of divorced couples who only married because of an accidental pregnancy.
The lesson to be learned here is - don't have sex if you can't accept the consequences!! Most teenagers never think STDs, AIDS or pregnancy can happen to them but that's just idiotic. It's biology and it can happen to ANYONE.
Talk to your gf and work it out.
2007-06-05 07:04:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do not make this baby be raised in a single parent home!!!! Either marry her and raise the baby or give it up for adoption with a good family. Some moron wrote for you to not get married just because of a baby. What a thoughtless thing to say. Yes, either marry her and be a man and raise the child or give it up for adoption. Some say that you shouldn't marry just for the baby, that was right up until you forfeited your right by having sex and involving a child. Sex and marriage have to do with love and commitment. You can't pick and choose. You chose to have sex and must deal with the consequences and shame on you for wanting her to kill your baby you guys made just so you can play football. Have her give it up for adoption or something. Go to these sites, they are the best for helping people in this situation. Good luck and try to have some self control. People think they can have sex without consequences. Also, people say don't marry her unless you really love her. Why would you have sex with someone unless you loved them?
2007-06-05 11:42:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If she wants the baby she should keep it, but not to hang on to you....if you weren't involved in sports and had a scholarship would it matter if she kept the baby? Does she really want the kid? All you can do is you right now. You can still go to college and even to the pros with a kid on the side...I got a friend who went pro this year and had a kid in college....his priority is to make sure that his baby gets the best of the best....Don't get discouraged, it can be done....keep communication open between you and the baby's momma. Talk about what you hope to accomplish and is she ready to be a full time parent due to your games, practices etc....I really wish you well and congrads on the scholarship!!!
2007-06-05 08:03:24 · answer #7 · answered by Lil_MissVal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have thought about the fact that you were too young to be a dad before you dropped your pants.
No, you shouldn't marry her just because she's pregnant. But get prepared to spend the next 18 years paying child support. So, it looks like in addition to attending Notre Dame, you'll be working too. Unless, of course, you're independently wealthy.
2007-06-05 06:49:23 · answer #8 · answered by kp 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are old enough to be a football star and have sex and get a girl pregnant, so you're old enough to be a dad. Sorry, but you had unprotected sex and this is what happens as a result.
You don't need to necessarily get married unless you truly love her and want to have a life together with her and your child. However, you need to be prepared to have to pay child support for the next 18 years. So, I would STRONGLY suggest getting your education.
2007-06-05 06:45:10 · answer #9 · answered by Yogi 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sit down with her and have a realistic talk about your futures. You have plans and I'm sure she does too. None of that will happen if you have a baby too young.
My advice: ask her to seriously consider adoption. It's possible now to have what's called an "open adoption" that will allow her to stay in contact with the adoptive parents and be a part of the child's life if that's what she wants to do.
Going on public "assistance" is not a good option.
2007-06-05 06:44:28 · answer #10 · answered by petlady5 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋