Why do people home school there children?

Question

Ive never been home schooled and neither will my sons, but I just wanted to know what is the big deal for a child to go to public/private school?

I've noticed that numerous people on this forum have stated children who are homeschooled have a social disadvantage. Then SOME parents were on the defensive by saying "There child has friends that they interact with on a daily basis." What?? 5-10 children from the neighborhood? Please. Whats wrong with having different friends from different neighborhoods?

As a child, there is NO experience like a walk/bus to school with your friends, LEARNING IN A CLASSROOM SETTING(even if it includes a little classroom banter, thats what kids do), playing @ recess with your friends, walking home from school, doing homework/class projects with your parents. For those who had a traditional public/private school education who have decided to NOT allow your child to have the joyous experiences you had as a child, WHY? Did you NOT enjoy "being a kid

Yes, I understand there CAN BE distractions in the classroom(other kids, fire drills), but whats wrong with a traditional school setting? Do you want your children to be up under you all the time without having experience to respect authority other than you and OTHER adult family members? Believe it or not, there is a discipline factor in a traditional classroom. I think teachers HAVE THE HARDEST JOB IN THE WORLD(and are VERY underpaid) because they have to deal with 20-30 different personalities on a daily basis. With the country being MORE diverse than ever, school is the foundation in learning other cultures and traditions. It is a start so when you are older and you come into contact with different ethnicities, you know not to believe the different stereotypes society has placed on different nationalities.

As a child in grammar/middle/1st 2 yrs of HS , 95% of my friends/classmates(we were ALL friends) were afro american. I had NEVER seen a hispanic other than puerto rican.

As a child in grammar/middle/1st 2 yrs of HS , 98% of my friends/classmates were afro american/west indian(haitian, jamaican, guyanese, trini, etc). I had NEVER seen a hispanic other than puerto rican. When I transferred high schools my JR year, I had met dominican/brazilian/ecuadorian/
panamanian/peruvian/colombian people. Im glad i did go to public school because I WOULD HAVE NEVER met any other people than afro-american.

Its funny NO one said that public school would be good for learning different ethnicities/cultures. Maybe because here in NJ the culture is VERY diverse, I appreciate it a little more.

Yes, I did spell their wrong, but when you use "homeschool" in the form that you used it in, it is written "home school", not "homeschool"

I understand that SOME of the U.S. education isnt up to par and kids can get bored when they learn @ a faster pace than the rest of the class(I was one of those children)

I enjoyed going to school. Yeah there were bullys and troublemakers, but hey, it happens. I fel sorry for the children who have to sit for an hr or 2 o the school bus. I didnt have to experience that because here in NJ because MOST of the urban area schools are in the same neighborhood as our homes, unlike in rural areas.

I say teachers are underpaid because youve got people who all they do is play sports and they are getting paid millions of dollars, while the people who count in the "real world" like teachers, social workers, police & firemen(who risk there lives daily), make good money, but not as much as these glorified athletes. Dont get me wrong, I LOVE sports, but i live in the real world.

I do realize teachers make good money in NJ, but compared to all of the worthless occupations who pay more, they are underpaid.

Answer 1

There are many reasons for homeschooling (some outrageous, most not), but here is my reason.

My 9yr old daughter has a variety of medical 'issues'...for every 2 days she was in the classroom, she was home sick in bed for 3 (after awhile all those absences add up). Two of her 'conditions' require that she carry an Inhaler (asthma) and an Epipen Jr. (Anaphalxia). When I informed the school that she needed to have these items on her at all times in event of an attack, I was informed that the medicine would have to stay either in the Infirmary or in the Front Office and she would have to be brought there in order to recieve treatment. Now please keep in mind that we had a notice from her Pediatrican that these items MUST stay WITH HER.
Not wanting to make waves, I smiled, nodded my head and gave the school a set and then slipped a set in my daughter's backpack (she had it if she needed it), I was also 'informed' that while her need of an Epipen negated her being able to play outside at recess she was 'required' to attend OUTSIDE Gym classes without her Epipen.
My daughter almost died during a OUTSIDE Gym class when she was stung by a Wasp and then told to 'Shut Up and Deal' when it happened-----in less then 2 minutes after being stung my daughter went into CARDIAC ARREST. I was not informed of the incident until 1 hour later when she was in ICU and minimally stabilized----her grade level at school was 1st Grade. The Gym Teacher had the balls to tell me that she did not know of my daughter's health condition nor was she informed of the need for an Epipen or Inhaler, nor was she ever instructed in the use of such 'Medical paraphanalia'. She also stated to me that she was teaching the class alone and had no time to 'deal' with a 'WHINEY BABY', nor any way of reaching the Office Staff other then to send a child to inform them that there had been an 'incident'.

I will NEVER again entrust my child to the care of the Public School System. These so called 'Professional' Educators are poorly trained, in some cases woefully underpaid, are thrown into classrooms that hold 30 children and expected to 'teach' pupils but can no longer discipline ( if you do something wrong in class you get it from the Teacher then get sent to the Office and get it there and then go home and get it again). Gone are the days of the Teacher being held responsible for her students and classroom (nowadays we have Teacher's showing BrokeBack Mountain in class instead of actually TEACHING). Gone are the days when kids went to school properly attired and said Yes Ma'm, No Ma'm, May I, Please and Thank you. Now the kids get a half day in the middle of the week, Teacher isn't expected to utilize his/her time for Lesson planning the way they should and we allow the FCAT which has no real signifigance other then to see if the Teacher is even teaching the material (they spend 3 months learning that junk instead of learning to read, write and figure.) Still half our kids can't do any of it and the Teacher's complain they don't have enough time to teach or plan but yet want off more days. Our response you ask!?! Lengthen the school day, cut down summer vacation and add more Teacher Planning days. What's wrong with that picture???? OH and while your at it, let's dumb down the academics, yet require 4th graders to start Algebra and require High Schoolers to have volunteers hours in order to graduate (little hard to volunteer if Jr. and Sally are spending 90% of their time at home catching up on school work that they couldn't finish in class) and flunking them if they don't have all the 'Required time' but pass Paul and MaryJo because they are on the Football and Cheer Squad (don't worry they don't need to read for those jobs....just play well and look sexy).
Just so that the record is set straight... I am a product of the late 60's, attended both Pulic/Private school in the 70's & 80's, recall 'Corporal Punishment' and it's ripple effect and went on to become a Preschool Teacher---I have since that time witnessed the decline of our youth, the total lack of discipline,respect for self and others and the lack thereof morals and standards. My children ( I have two) understand that I make the rules not them, I am the final authority in all things (unless you are dealing with Religion then I pass the buck to God), I brought them into this world and I can take them out. Don't like the fact that I spank---here's the phone, while you are calling Children's Services I'll pack your bags and you can wait outside for them and don't let the door hit you in the butt on your way out.

To sum it all up ---yeah I loved being a kid and yeah I think I'll let her have a joyous occasion .....by learning in an environment that treats her for the individual she is, not some seat assignment or dollar sign (for every child the school has they get yeah so much money and are not above fudging their records). The old days are gone and school is not the same as you and I once knew it--if it was then the old rules would still apply, kids would have far more respect and life would be easier.
My kids get their 'Social' from Girl/Boy Scouts, neighborhood children, Church, Volunteer Work, and Living History and extra curricular activities.

Answer 2

I know that for most kids bullies etc are not such a big deal, but it's different when you're the one who's bullied for a decade straight and you don't have any friends. Also, school was way too easy for me (IQ 150+... can't help it, sometimes I wish I were normal). I was depressed thoughout most of my teenage years and still occasionally struggle with depression and anxiety and such. I frequently had suicidal thoughts. I can't call school a "joyous" experience, ahem. I honestly don't know how I managed to get through and survive.

Depending on where you live school does not expose kids to other ethnicities at all. We live in a rural area and 98% of the population is white, and about the same percentage of the kids in the local public school is white. If I were to homeschool my kids I'd have much more time to take them on trips to Dallas and such (the closest nearby city) where they could actually experience some diversity, so I think homeschooling would actually be good for learning about different ethnicities when compared to sending the kids to school.

Btw... in my experience, kids from similar socioeconomic and ethnic backgrounds tend to form groups together in school. I'm Dutch and the muslims didn't mix with the white population, and among the white kids the poor kids always hung out with each other and the rich kids with each other... there was very little mixing among groups.

Edit: And btw, ignore the people with the lame comments about spelling. As long as u dont spell liek this, ur speling is cool. ;)

Answer 3

First off, let me preface my answer by saying that homeschooling is not for everyone. It takes a level of dedication that some parents aren't willing or able to provide to their children, since it usually requires a single income household with two actively involved parents.

We have chosen to homeschool our children for the following reasons:
1. We can provide an education tailored to the child, based on "their" (not there) interests and ability to grasp concepts.
2. We can filter some of the nonsense that our child will be exposed to in a public school, such as the violence and language that some children express even at a young age.
3. We can incorporate some of our religious beliefs into their education.
4. We can remove some of the technology out of their early education. Stick to the pen and paper instead of the computer, multiplication tables instead of the calculator. There will be a time for technology, but we feel that it isn't necessary in elementary schooling.
5. We can do more field trips and have more flexible schedules.

We did enjoy being "kids", but socialization is not an integral part of the institutionalized educational process. Sure it is a great place to meet your peers, but it is not the only place. There are other activities such as athletics, church, and scouting where friendships can develop with other children. I suggest you read more on homeschooling before dispelling it as a bad idea for everyone. Heck, it was good enough for our founding fathers.

Answer 4

Because we like to actually learn things. You know, the small stuff. Such as the difference between "their" and "there."
I've been homeschooled my entire life *cue gasps* I love it. I had a completelt normal childhood. I was, and still am, a little more behaved and respectful than the rest of the kids. I'm also getting my diploma (nationally acreditted and recognized by colleges everywhere) this June. I'm already excepted into a program where I can become a Medical Assistent when I graduate. Yes, this means being around other people, dealing with them and socializing. I'm I worried or nervous? No, because I have SOCIAL SKILLS.

Oh, well. I guess starting out early, planning a career and becoming self-relient all by the age of 17 is just a Homeschooling side effect.

Answer 5

I chose to homeschool my son because he wasn't really learning anything in public school. And it's not that he isn't smart. He is. He just had a hard time dealing with all the social pressures. He is not a very social person. He has a hard time making new friends. He does have friends, but none of them are from school. He was 'sick' alot and it was a struggle every night to get him to do his homework. And it was a struggle in the morning to get him up for school. He started asking to be homeschooled when he was in fifith grade. Finally at the end of seventh I decided to give it a try for eight grade. Life in my home has been 80% better. Now that the school year is almost over, we have decided to continue to home school next year. We plan to take it year by year. I don't feel that I am depriving my son of anything. I went to public school and I survived. My daughter goes to public school and she loves it. But not every child does .I think homeschooling should be determined on an individual basis.
As I read over your question I realize that your last paragraph sums up all the reasons that I took my son out of public school. It just didn't work for him.

Answer 6

I chose to homeschool my children for a lot of different reasons. I was public schooled and DID NOT enjoy it. In second grade, my teacher wouldn't let me go to the restroom and I peed in my pants. I was forever after known as "pee pee girl" because of it. Yeah, I couldn't wait for that to happen to my kids. Then in middle school I was jumped no less than 3 times for being a white girl. Not my assumption, they told me this as they were beating me down. Yeah, I guess every kid should experience that too. The public schools in my city don't have recess. The private ones do on occasion, but I have NEVER seen public school children on the playgound (except the head-start, Pre-K aged ones). I was a bus rider in school, and I vowed to never let my children on a school bus even if they did go to school. See, there's nothing like being dinged in the back of the head with pencils and stuff for trying to behave yourself. There's nothing like taking 2.5 hours to get home from school when you live 2 miles away because fights break out every day on the bus. Yeah, tell me again why my kids aren't in public school??? Otherwise, I had a blast as a kid. I was in scouts, 4-H club and other clubs. I met kids from all over the country through those clubs. As do my own children today. They aren't around only the kids in our neighborhood. In fact there aren't any kids in the neighborhood that my kids hang with.

Answer 7

If this is the closed-minded, illogical thinking being taught in public schools today, I'm GLAD we're homeschooling.

First you say "Then SOME parents were on the defensive by saying "There (sic) child has friends that they interact with on a daily basis." What?? 5-10 children from the neighborhood? Please. Whats (sic) wrong with having different friends from different neighborhoods?"

My children's friends live all over the city (my older son has one friend who lives across the street). Because there are no other homeschoolers in our neighborhood, we have to go to different parts of the city to interact with other kids (yes, even those from different ethnicities). We meet all kinds of people in our day-to-day experiences (like going to the grocery store, the doctor's office, the dry cleaners, ...) - african-american, asian-american, Puerto Rican, Panamanian, ...

Then you say that by going to public school with different ethnicities, "you know not to believe the different stereotypes society has placed"

You obviously know little to nothing about homeschoolers (as well as harboring some stereotypes about us). The reasons people homeschool have nothing to do with different races in school. Most people homeschool because 1-the public school system (in general) stinks, or 2-the schools ignore religious teaching.

Next time, check your arguments (and your facts) before casting stones at those who have committed no sins. We're not trying to convince you to homeschool, so don't try convincing us to send our kids to public/private school. Can't you just allow us to raise our kids as we see best? We have made a conscious decision to keep our kids home. Will you do the same before sending your child to the public school?

Answer 8

Oh, please, don't kid yourself about how diverse public schools are! I live in NJ, and as diverse as the ~state~ is, the 650+ school districts make it very segregated. If my children went to our neighborhood school, they would interact only with kids within 3 years of their age, and the vast majority would be the same ethnicity and socioeconomic level.

As for teachers not being paid well - get real. That argument may have been true 20 years ago, but with starting salaries in NJ of $45,000 for 9 months work and fantastic benefits, that is no longer true.

Finally, I live in NJ and our neighbors are on the bus 45 minutes for a 5 minute trip to the school. The number of stops makes the trip last forever. What a waste of time!

Everyone else answered your other arguments as I would have.

Edited to add: We can debate how much sports and media stars make, but that isn't really a valid argument here. Let's compare how much your average worker with a 4 year college degree makes (including benefits) and I think you will find that teachers are doing very well! Let's not forget about job security - on the first day of their 4th year teaching they get tenure, which makes it extremely hard for them to be removed from the job. Unlike the average joe, who can be laid off at any time from their job!

Answer 9

Many of the other answers here to perfectly correct.

Also, the United States Educational system is in a mess because we have a President who wants to kill children in Iraq at a cost of BILLIONS of dollars and we don't even plow millions into the school system.

Want to really find out, watch Oprah. She did a whole thing on NYC schools and how roofs, cellings, walls and bathrooms are falling apart around the kids who are there to learn.

We are now averging 10 school a semester with students shooting teachers and students.

In Los Angeles they have metal decoters in the elementary schools.

10% of the students in California are making the top 85%

55% of the students in Calfironi are failing or doing D level work

35% of the students in California are in the bottom 20% of the schools.

If we plowed the kind of money they are making war with into the school system every kid would have a shot at being an Einstein.

Right now 10% can make it into college via public schools.

Answer 10

It's a matter of vision and point of view. I would rather raise my children than have someone else do it. I have taken sociology and psychology courses and see no true benefit to being in a classroom of 25-30+ same age peers on a daily basis; there is much to be said AGAINST such a setup. Look at the peer dependency that has developed in the past 100 years.

Schools here are neighbourhood schools. The kids already live next to each other so I'm not sure why you have a problem with homeschooled kids possibly only knowing people in their neighbourhood. (My kids actually don't know anybody in the neighbourhood: their best friends live on the other side of our city.) Furthermore, your argument is weak: it implies that someone should not live in a really small town because they won't get to know people from different neighbourhoods.

I'm not sure how going to school is "being a kid". My kids are allowed to be kids much more by being homeschooled than they would if they were in school.

I personally loved school. Not everything about it, but I loved going to school. I am very aware now of how there were certain things that affected me quite negatively and it's been a struggle as an adult to overcome those things. I loved school so much I became a teacher. But then I taught and my perspective changed. I realized *I* was the primary caregiver for the year for those kids--they saw me far more than they saw their own parents, especially if they participated in any extra-curricular activities. I saw all the social nonsense that happened and knew that if they were in a more natural social setting (fewer people and a wider age of ranges), they would grow up more maturely. I hated that the program dictated that we had to complete everything and that it was specifically designed so that there would always be children who struggled and barely passed and those on the other end would be bored half the time.

You might be totally fine with all that; that's fine. Not everybody will agree on any issue. I'm not fine with all that. I am willing and able to provide my children with something different, something I feel is better.

And I have to laugh: doing homework/class projects with your parents--what do you think homeschooling families do????? And if you ask my kids about recess, they would far prefer to have the hour+ "recesses" they have now instead of only going outside for 15 minutes at a time.

You're right: there is no experience like learning in a classroom setting. There's also no experience like teaching your child how to read. Like spending an hour in the morning reading together because it's a really good book--and there's no school bus to go catch so you can sit there and read that book. There is no experience like "the joyous experiences" of being a happy family learning and growing together.

How about turning the tables: what's the big deal with wanting to raise your kids, to have family be more important than friends, to give them a better social sphere, to let them have more time to be kids instead of having someone outside the home dictate the majority of their waking hours, to give them an education that works for them? I could go on.

Understand that homeschoolers do not in any way feel that you have done something bad by sending your child to a school. Each person has to make their own decision based on what they feel capable of and what is most important to them. It would be wrong of you to homeschool your children if you didn't feel it would actually be better for them.

ADDED:
"Do you want your children to be up under you all the time without having experience to respect authority other than you and OTHER adult family members? "

How are my kids going to learn to respect other adult family members by going to school? They get that by us doing things with our family. Which we do rather often. Also, they take classes and there are a WHOLE ton of adult present at any homeschooling activity. They know that adults are to be respected and looked at as an authority. I'd say they understand it far better than the average public school student I taught.

SECOND ADDITION: Diversity? That's the most important aspect of a child's upbringing? Fwiw, we've got, on our street alone, people from China, somewhere in Africa, India and Pakistan. The homeschoolers we know are the typical English/white Canadians, plus people from Germany, Jamaica, two families from South Africa, various religions, Mexico, Spain... In the big picture, I just don't see how "diversity" is supposed to be a deciding factor in whether to send a child to school or to homeschool them. If you raise a child well, they don't need to have ever met a person from Russia to be respectful of them when they meet one as an adult.