i was out on sat night and my best friends husband came on to me again ..i have always told her when this happens ...she had a go at him ...and he said i came on to him !!! she believes me as his nearly 50 and im 35 ...she knows i never would if he was the last man on earth ....then i have also heard that a friend of ours was upset as i was talking to her husband !!! all i said to him was hi at the bar while i was getting a drink !!!dont even know his name for christs sake !!!
seems to me as im a single woman of 35 they are all afraid im going to go after there husbands !!! or the men think im up for it as i have been single for a while
not bragging but i dont think im ugly ...i scrub up pretty well !!
i think they are just scared of a pretty woman !!
just getting sick of being labelled as a sex object
please help !!! anyone with simalar experiences
2007-05-29 04:32:28 · 13 answers · asked by cowgirl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
get new friends then
2007-05-29 04:35:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
WARNING! I am in the final moments of a marriage of more than 20 years. I lived CONSTANTLY with a woman whose insecurities absolutely ate her up and destroyed any chance for a relationship. The fact that you're asking the question tells me you realize your fears are not healthy, and so have hope for your relationship; my wife never figured it out, and she's got no chance. So what to do- Step 1: Understand that your husband NEEDS you to believe in him. There's nothing like unreasonable jealousy to tell a man that you don't think he has the character of a real man. Step 2: Tell your husband that you really believe in him and love him. Step 3: Admit to him you have an insecurity that makes you want to prevent him from being around attractive women, and that you know that's not good for the relationship, but you want him to help you work through it and figure out how to resolve it. Give him the examply your asking about now. If you keep your insecurity secret, you will eventually start seeing and suspecting and fearing at every turn, and it will destroy you just as fast as it destroys your husband and the relationship. You can get through this if you work with him and let him team with you to overcome it. Get it out on the table and together, destroy it before it destroys you. Consider counseling with your husband so you both can understand and help each other through it.
2016-04-01 02:49:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been single a few times in my life and I can honestly say that men do, in the main, see single women as desperate women who need a man no matter who he is. Even my very best friends' husbands have come on to me at times, but I have never given them any impression at all that I fancied them and have had to make a joke of it - even if it has made them feel like sright idiot. But I have never told their wives, because I know they would turn it round and say that I came on to them. Just make it very clear to all married men that you are strictly OFF the menu. Some of them are stupid enough to think you don't mean it (as they think they are so irrestible) but never let your strength slide. If you are pretty and go out on your own, then I can see you are actually putting yourself up as "on the pull" - but as long as you keep resisting men who are already attached - I wish you luck. These men will probably start a rumour that you are gay, or frigid, poor creatures.
2007-05-29 04:50:51 · answer #3 · answered by Normsgirll 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have this experience with my friends and neighbours and women in general. My neighbour has never spoken a word to me, her husband only says hello when she's not there, ignores me when she is (he is (I'll say it politely) unattractive-so what is that about!?) My friends seem to tense up when their husbands appear, and seem to spend alot of time watching me until the guy goes. It's really, really annoying, and really, really insulting especially when the guy is ugly/old - what do they actually think I look like then!? It is possible to see a funny side, wind them up, believe you must have huge sex appeal, the husbands talk about you wistfully, the women believe you are better looking than they are. I try to have a laugh with it privately to myself, but I do feel really uncomfortable. Sometimes I feel like I can't even look at the guy, and feel like I appear guilty but he's repulsive to me! It's just another sad reflection of the way society views single people, especially single women.
2007-05-29 12:08:43 · answer #4 · answered by Acai 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've had similar experiences not with mates husbands but an x colleague thinking I was well up for it as I was mid thirities and single despite the fact he has a partner. He kept offering up massages and texting me late at night and early hours of the morning. I told him I thought he had a cheek and he was becoming a pest that soon got rid!! x
2007-05-29 04:40:05 · answer #5 · answered by farleyjackmaster 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is their problem. not yours! They are simply taking their insecurities out on you! I have never felt like that with my single female friends, as I trust both my fiance and my friends not to do anything! I think you need to sit them down and say that you are never going to proposition their husbands and that you have scruples for crying out loud! With regards to the pervert husband, just do your up most not to be in a position where he can proposition you, difficult I know but I think once you start avoiding him and making it obvious, he may get the hint. How dare you be single and attractive eh?!! lol!
2007-05-29 05:29:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's life for a 30 something single woman who hangs out with married friends....
Insecurity that's the problem.. men are untrustworthy lot you know!.
Don't think bad of your friends, its human nature to want to protect what is theirs they are only looking out for themselves, there are many marriages laying in ruins because hubby has run off with wives best friend..
Put yourself in their shoes, see their point of view, and when that guy comes onto you again,, slap his face!.
2007-05-29 04:48:36 · answer #7 · answered by robert x 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, luv, if all of them are saying it ... you must be giving off some "vibes" you are unaware of. I know the plight of the attractive single woman and other women's husbands ... and you may have the married woman who is insecure . . . but if all of them are feeling that way ... you are unconsciously doing "something" to encourage rather than discourage the attention of married men.
2007-05-29 04:56:51 · answer #8 · answered by Skully 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe in future only go out with your friends on the basis that their husbands do not come along!!
2007-05-29 04:37:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a lot of female friends....they are just friends and i have known them for like 10 years.... and yet my g/f doesnt like it if i got out for drinks with them when she is away.... I can understand it....
2007-05-29 04:52:56 · answer #10 · answered by Fox Hunter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I`d say u should chnge your friends&dont get upset about that situation.No worth!
2007-05-29 04:36:55 · answer #11 · answered by Inferno 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋