I'm having a "vegan" relative come to town to visit with us for a few days. However, he insists that we

Question

consume no animal products in his presence. I don't know how I could ask my wife and kids to abstain from milk with there breakfast, or meat with there dinner, for an entire week. We have not seen this relative in years, and would like to see him, but I think his request is unreasonable. He's even told us that if we go out to a resturant for dinner that he would not be able to tolerate watching my family consume any animal products. What am I to do? Is his request unreasonable?

I think his request is very unreasonable. But I know that if we do not accomadate him he will simply find this to be unacceptable and pitch a fit. He thinks that he is always right if it involves veganism, and believes that anyone who does not endorse his way of life is misguided. He seems to believe that the opinions of others, if they are not in line with his own, are not valid and without merit. He is so closed minded and I think he looks down on my family because they are omnivores. He's also always preaching his beliefs to my impressionable kids, which is another thing I take issue with? I wonder how he would like it if I preached to his kids the benefits of eating meat. But I do not want to offend him, and am looking for a solution that will keep the peace.

Answer 1

Pitch a tent for the whiner in your back yard, and introduce him to our abolitionist vegans on answers. You are a veggie, but I know your wife and kids are not, so he should be as respectful of others choices as you are. Give him a goose down comforter to keep him warm in his tent. As for the restaurant, tell him if he can even FIND a restaurant that does not serve meat, you will treat him to his meal. I have yet to find one within 200 miles of my home.

Answer 2

If it means taht much for you to get to see him, pack meat in your lunches for the week and invite him to share some of his favorite vegan recipes with the family during the week. From what I've found in life vegans are always very happy to share thier dietary theology with any and all people. And some soy milks aren't really that bad on cereal.

For the record he is unreasonable but it would keep the peace in the family. I guess it all comes down to which is more important: not eating meat for a week or losing a family member you obviously care about.

Answer 3

His request is rude, to be sure. When you are a guest in someone else's home you should respect their way of life. He clearly has strong beliefs about vegetariansim and that's respectable, but being rude is not. I would let him know that you are eager to visit but perhaps it would be best if he stay at a hotel if he cannot tolerate your family's lifestyle. Or you might let him know when you will be eating your animal products ahead of time so he could go to his room and do something else during that time. OR, you could look at it as an adventure for your family and head on down to your local health food store and let him help you pick up some things for your family to try during his visit. Think of it as an adventure! Who knows, you might even like it. Cereal is delicious with unsweetened almond milk! And there are some tasty meat alternative you could sample. Even your local grocery store has frozen meatless entrees. And how can you go wrong with fresh fruits and veggies? It's only a week, after all. How greatly you want to visit this relative will determine how much you want to accomodate him.

Answer 4

I am a vegan and I think that is highly unreasonable. I live at home with my family, who are all meat eaters, and we get along fine. They don't pressure me to eat meat, and I respect their decision not to change their diet. I feel that if your relative feels that disgusted with meat, why not ask them to say in a hotel room, the two of you eat during your free time, and then meet up somewhere to have fun and visit. Go bowling or to a local attraction or something. That way, he isn't in your house complaining about the smell of your meat, and you can eat without feeling condemned.

Answer 5

Ok, he has a problem, that's very apparent. Now for a solution so you can have a nice visit.

One: Have him eat in another room with those that want to eat as he does and the rest of you eat what you want some where else.

Two: Since he is your relative take him out to eat for every meal - vegan style and let your family eat without you or him, it is for one week only. That way you will have one on one visiting without interruptions.

Three: Tell him you respect his request and will do what you can to comply.

Four: Ask him to stay in a motel and come visit during the week.

Five: Send your family, wife and children, on vacation and you be there to entertain him alone and comply with his wishes.

Six: Tell him no, when in Rome...

and remember when you go to visit him, it is his turn to feed you animal products!

Good luck!

Answer 6

It is very unreasonable. It is fine if he chooses to live a vegan lifestyle. But it's unreasonable to expect everyone around you to do the same. I would politely tell him you are not able to accomodate him request, and maybe it would be better if he not come visit or stay at a hotel while he is in town and only stop by during off meal times.

Answer 7

I'm a vegan and I think that is horrible. However, I have omnivores tell me how poor they think my choice is and that I should not make people go through the "trouble" of preparing my food a certain way at restaraunts, etc. I agree with the general consensus- offer to have some soy on hand, but other than that, forward this page to him so he can see just what a nut everyone thinks he is!

Answer 8

Having been a vegan for many years myself, I can understand not wanting to see people eating something I don't agree with in front of me. However, that being said, that only applies if they're coming to my house. My house, my rules. If i was going to somebody else's house, there is no way that I could demand that they not only accommodate my dietary needs, but also that they practice it themselves. That is presumptuous and rude. At the very most I'd just ask if I could prepare my own meals and eat it alone away from people during meal time. (but I've never done that either.)

How is somebody going to visit YOU and tell you how to live inside your own house??

Answer 9

It's your choice whether to accomodate him or not. But have you even asked what's his reason for such requests? maybe he'll puke on sight of animal flesh? won't that make your dinner less pleasing?

One can only educate others on their choice of lifestyle but not force them. We won't expect if vegetarians cut off the meat supply. Similarly, we shouldn't force a steak into a vegetarian's mouth. In future, if your children (or whoever) decide to be vegetarian, don't stop them. respect their decision instead.

Answer 10

Yes, this is certainly unreasonable. It is one thing for him to ask you to take him in and provide for his dietary differences, but another entirely to make you change your habits. If he cannot stand eating around your nonvegan-ness, you can allow him to eat at another time. If he is willing to cook all of your meals for you and introduce you to a non-meat way of eating, that is fine, as long as he provides for your tastes- but by no means do you have to cater to his every whim if he is not willing to make sacrifices as well. He cannot stay away from animal products all the time, after all, so he has no right to make you specifically change for him.

Answer 11

It is not totally unreasonable. Just let him eat in the kitchen by himself and set him down in the living room with a book while you and the family eat. Skip the restaurant. If he is not happy with this arrangement then his veganism is just for show. Someone who is truly into a vagan lifestyle should value piece and harmony.