Forgive a cheater?

Question

My boyfriend cheated on me in the past, and I can't get over it. I feel as if he betrayed me, so whenI get mad, I throw the cheating in his face because after all these months I haven/'t forgive him. His cheating went on for almost two months without me knowing. I feel like as if he spit in my face. At that time, I was open with him. I let my guards down, and we was having sex... F%$#@ wth my pride and self-esteem. I try to forgive him, but I can't. Whenever, I think about, it feels like the first day I found out about it. Im still hurt! However, when we are not fighting, we have fun and enjoy each others company. In the last few months I see, he's been trying to make it up to me... But I still feel hurt.

I need to forgive him

Answer 1

I know you love him anyeverything, but this is what I think about a cheater, If someone has the nerves to cheat on you and fuc* someone with pride he don't care about you well he does but he might be losing feelings for you trust me girl I know what your going threw. I know your trying to forgive him but he aint gonna happen.

Answer 2

That is tough. I know what you mean. I feel you.

I question that myself. If you forgive him, does this mean that the feelings of hurt is gone? Or does that mean you forgive him but your guard is up because it is a defense mechenism that is protecting you from the awful feeling that hasnt even gone away from the first time and has nothing to do with forgivness? What is forgiveness? I mean I feel the same way! I forgave him, but I still feel the pain as it was the first time and it has been a year now! People forgive and move on by leaving the cheater because they will not tolerate another feeling like that again, so is that forgiveness?

Just because you forgive someone doesnt mean you forget.....or does it?

Answer 3

you already know what they are asserting, "as quickly as a cheater, constantly a cheater." that is tricky to regain that believe. are you able to forgive AND overlook that somebody you cared approximately grew to become out to be a cheater? If sure, then the situation does not count, ultimate? because you're able to miss the finished ingredient and supply a 2d hazard. Now that varies from each man or woman. If the guy who cheated differences for the extra perfect, and the reason for cheating is extremely worth forgiving and moving on, they ok.

Answer 4

Let me tell you something once someone blows up your trust they can never gain it back and even if for some reason you forgive him it's not going to be the same the trust it's gone the whole relationship it's gone as well, But don't forgive him, be a strong woman and have dignity to yourself by not forgiving him, you may forgive him because it's the right thing to do but don't get back with him It's over. Good Luck

Answer 5

Personally I would forgive (because it is doing you harm not to) but I would never forget and the relationship would be permanently changed. However, you need to make a conscience decision not to throw the past up in arguments. As hard as that may be then even in the heat of the moment you are still responsible for the words that come out of your mouth! If you feel there are things that you need to say about the affair then tell him that you want to talk about it and have a conversation solely about that. Would he go to relationship counselling with you?

Answer 6

Not just no but HELL NO! Never forgive a cheater because we all know once a cheater always a cheater. Going back to him is just letting him gear up for another blow like that somewhere down the road. Get away from that narotic relationship and find someone out of the millions of nice guys to treat you like you should. I caught my ex cheating on me and I was stupid enough to stay with her after she apologized over and over.For the rest of our relationship I could not ever give her any trust, I was always thinking she was out with someone else, my nerves stayed shot and couldn't get much rest. Love without trust just doesn't exist, period. Needless to say she continued cheating on me but since I was suspicious now she doubled her efforts not to get caught. I only set myself up by staying to get hurt again and I most certainly did. To top things off she came up pregnant and for the longest time I had no idea the kid was mine. The baby turned out mine and I love her so much but I will always have to have something to do with her whore mother. Get out while you still can and ignore the phone calls or seeing him for a long time to avoid a relapse. Best of luck

Answer 7

If you want to continue a relationship with him you have to truly forgive him. By forgiving him you have to accept that what he did was in the past and start rebuilding the trust. If you can't truly forgive and you keep bringing up the fact that he cheated on you then you should move on. It's not fair to you and it's not fair to him to stay in a relationship where there is no trust. You deserve to be in a happy relationship with someone you love and trust.

Answer 8

if you can't let it go, then your relationship will just go down the tubes. I'm not trying to tell you that you're feelings are not justified, because they most certainly are. but you deserve better, no matter how much he tries to make it up to you. and you'll always have that feeling of resentment and betrayal. plus I'm sure you no longer trust him, so really, I don't see a point in making your relationship work. Whatever you do, good luck!

Answer 9

Once a guy cheats on you, he's bound to do it all over again so NEVER FORGIVE THIS GUY. If you forgive him, it's just you subtly telling him that it's ok for him to cheat on you. Love yourself and you don't deserve a guy who keeps on doing this to you.

Answer 10

You can forgive, but you never will forget.

I suggest you find a better mate. Staying with this one is only going to put you on an emotional rollercoaster. Get on out now......I know you say you have fun, but you can find someone else to have fun with, and he will remain faithful to you.