if you grew up without a parent due to them not wanting to be around for whatever reason...?

Question

do you still think about them on a regular basis. do you think that they think of you at least on a weekly basis? how do you think that they could disconnect themselves for you?

Answer 1

I can't say that my parents just up and walked away, but they died when I was five and there isn't a day I don't think about them. I mean they are your blood. I would say it is very normal to think about your parent and I am sure that you are always in their thoughts. You can't just forget about a child.

Everything happens for a reason and if you are talking about yourself in the questions above I would say that you don't necessarily maybe know all the details. People make mistakes and it sucks for your end. However, everything happens the way it is suppose to happen. I used to ponder this question when my mother and father both died at age 5, but I realized that if it wouldn't have happened would I not have been raised by my aunt and moved to another town, then I wouldn't have met my husband and I wouldn't have the two beautiful and wonderful children I have now.

So, as hard as it is you have to just move on. Just remember all these feelings that you are having now so that when you become a parent you don't make the mistakes that someone made on you.

Answer 2

My biological father has not been around for a long time. I am now 22 I think I may have been about 1 maybe 1 and a half. And I couldn't care less about him and what he is doing or whether he thinks about me because I do have a dad that cares for me and has never left when times get tough. He buys me birthday presents and christmas presents. My biological father has never bought me anything. Not even sent me a card no my birthday. But the best thing is revenge is sweet. I have 2 daughters whom he will never, ever meet, or set eyes on. I stopped thinking about my biological father along time ago.

Answer 3

Of course they think about you, as you think about them. There are many reasons that parents abandon their children. They can not afford to care for the child and hope that someone else could do a better job. They might be emotionally unable to care for a child. Just remember that one day they might come back into your life and they just might have the reason why they did what they did. It would be the first question that I asked them! I know it is hard and your probably wondering why all the time, but life goes on and you have to make a life for yourself as best you can.

Answer 4

My dad bailed on us when I was 12. He didn't want to pay child support to get at my mom. He wasn't really thinking about the fact that it was hurting us too.
1. No, I do not think about him on a regular basis, although I am trying to be forgiving and he has been making attempts to be apart of my life again. I have a family to care for now and don't have time to think about him. He hurt me and I don't want to relive that everyday.
2. I seriously doubt he thinks about me on a weekly basis. Two of my kids and my husband had birthdays recently and he never called or acknowledged it. He has a replacement family now. He shows up or calls every so often when he feels bad or needs to feel better.
3. My father disconnected himself out of guilt. Being around us and spending time with us makes him relive the choices he made that destroyed our family. He knows that at some point he is going to have to face up to his choices, but avoids us to avoid paying the price of his actions. Every time he is around me and my kids, he is reminded of what he has chosen to miss out on.

Answer 5

I grew up with neither parents my grandparents raised me. My mom had me young and left me there. She still came and visited me and we still talk today. My dad I have nothing to do with...he beat my mom several times and I blame him for everything. He was in and out of jail, alcoholic, abuser, he even "kidnapped" me from my grandparents who at the time were not my legal guardians yet. I could care less about him..he claims he has changed but I do not care. He has a grandchild that he will never get to be apart of his life. He did not want me then so why should I want him now. I do not know if he thinks of me it does not matter my life is great and I have grown up to be a loving wife and mother without his influence on me.

Answer 6

My mom disappeared for a while when I was a kid and then showed back up. Once I became 18, I wanted nothing to do with her. She still keeps in touch with my brother and is very close with one of them. I am 26 now and think about her from time to time, but only because my brother mentions her. I would be fine living the rest of my life, never hearing a word about her. The only thing that bothers me is that she wants nothing o do with me. She ran away from my father and three kids to be with a man who was charged with sexual abuse to children under the age of ten. She then stood by him through the trial knowing that child was me. I guess I have more reasons to hate her too, but she's not worth it.

Answer 7

My parents divorced when I was 4 & my sister was three. After a little while I never saw my father. Growing up I always wondered what happened. My Mother remarried. I never asked her about him I think because of my step father. (I hated him) When I decided to get married my brother found my Dad for me. After all those years he had saved cards & letters he had sent to me & my sister during the years they were marked return to sender. My Dad died five years later when I was pregnant with my first child. To this day i still don't have answers, but I did get my Dad for those 5 years. Every situation is different I found that the thinking & wondering was the hardest part. I wish you much happiness.

Answer 8

My parents divorced when I was 3 or 4. My dad left the state when I was 8. We saw him summers & christmas (he always came us - we never went to his house) until we moved across country when I was 14. I saw him once when I was 18 and haven't since.
I think about him every once in awhile, but it is always bitter. I don't know if he thinks about me. I think he left me and my brother becuase he is selfish and it was the easiest way. I really would have nothing to say to him today. His leaving has made me strong, though, and I would never, ever do that to my kids.

Answer 9

I didn't meet my father till I was 25 years old. My mother left him when I was two. I thought about him on a regular basis, always wondered where he was, what type of man he was, if we had anything in common. I got to meet him on his death bed. He wanted to meet me. I almost didn't go because my mother/grandfather/alot of the family didn't think he deserved to see me since he hadn't been around.
But I did go, because for once it wasn't about anybody else, it was about me and who I was. I don't know whether he deserved to meet me or not, but I did know that I deserved to meet him, regardless of how I'd feel afterwards.
Best thing I ever did, found out alot about myself, my family and him. Not to mention it wasn't totally him, one of my aunts had told him I'd be better off without him when he came across 4 states to try to see me and ran him off. A bitter "thinks she knows it all" changed my life forever. Good or bad that wasn't for her to decide.
There is still alot of regrets and sadness, but that empty hole of wonder is filled. He died a week later. But atleast I got the chance to find out where I get my since of humor, my eyes, my love for motorcycles and so many other things. You wouldn't believe the kinds of things a child inherits from their parents, even if they were'nt raised by that parent.
I never doubt that him walking away that day must have been the most painful thing he ever did.

Answer 10

My mom left my dad when I was two because he was abusive to her she moved us to a town about 20min. away from him and he could have came and seen me whenever he wanted but rarly did he would come up on some weekends allway's with a different excuse for all the time in between visites and he would promise to come up the next weekend and 4or5 months later he would call with yet another lame excuse and I would belive him over and over again then when I became state certifide to babysit he wanted me to come live with him so I could watch his 3 other kids[he said those exact words to me at ten years old] when I said no he kidnapped me and went across state for a while and since my mom didn't have any papers stating that she had full custody the cop's couldn't do anything about it when I started to make a fuss my stepmom took me back to my mom's and since everything that happend my mom was terrified she moved us half way across the U.S. And it seemed like he droped of the face of the earth then after about 2 years he called me up and acted like the worlds best dad.This has been about ten years ago and all has still not been forgivin. he never writes I have never gotten a card on my birthday or chrismas or even a call and to be honest It still hurt's alot I'm a grown woman with my own baby and every year on my birthday I feel like a ten year old girl just waiting for a call and it has never came. I still hear from him on occasian usally he is drunk and need's to lay his promblems on me wich hurts because he is the parent and i have never been abul to lay my promblems on him I haven't even seen him in 11 years to sum this up yes I still think about him on at least a weekly basis and it allways hurt's when I do,I feel he thinks of me not on a weekly basis but every now and then I probally cross his mind.in my personal case he uses drug's and work to block any thought's of me from his head and I feel that one day he will wake up and realize he has no one to blame for the emotional distance between us but himself and then he will want to reconnect I just hope it's not to late at that point for me to put myself out there again.