How do I encourage someone to get help for his/her self who's afraid to?

Question

This person is distrustful of others intentions, (chronic, traumatic and painful history of events) paranoid, difficult to emotionally connect with and has considered/attempted suicide before.. He/she secretly cuts self as an outlet for coping, is an ex-drug addict, rejects friendships and has few family. He/she appears okay and social in public ( when not in reclusion) but I know the real person is far from it internally. He/she is a devoted and loving parent and knows mental help is needed but is scared that reaching too far for it would bring jeopardy of hospitalization (mental floor) or other consequent that could come from it. This person has a psychiatrist and mental therapist but only shares with them the topics and issues of which wouldn't pose a threat of being hospitalized. He/she is extremely fearful of something terrible happening to his/her children while away for in-patient treatment..... I'm the only one left that is trusted by this person....What do I do?

Answer 1

This person seriously needs psychiatric help, especially since you say he/she is suicidal and uses cutting as an outlet. If this person is afraid that inpatient hospitalization will result in harm to that person's children, what on earth is he/she thinking of during suicidal episodes? What would happen to the kids then?

Your friend sounds like a paranoid schizophrenic, and needs help. If the issue with the kids is all that is keeping him/her from getting that help, surely there must be a relative or friend who would be willing to take care of the children. You are to be commended for your concern, and since this person trusts you, would he/she consider you or someone you recommend to care for the children in the event that he/she has to be hospitalized? Does this person have parents, siblings or other relatives to come to the rescue? Other than that, I would hope that his/her trust in you will somehow encourage that person to be more open with the doctors, and express his/her fears regarding the children. Then the specialists might make some suggestions that he/she, you or I haven't thought of. It's worth a try, so why not suggest that to him/her? Good luck!

Answer 2

It sounds like the instinctual need to hide when feeling cornered. All of the symptoms described were ones of isolation... but that's obvious. Sadly, isolationism is VERY hard to counter because you and everyone else in the world is the enemy. Trust only goes as far as the mind lets it. And thus, you must approach the person as you would a cornered animal... slow and reassuring. He won't let you in immediately and his subconscious will do everything it can to reject you and anyone else.

However, a kind word and a helping hand is usually a good option. Knowing that you are there will allow him to feed off of your strength and will (hopefully) give him some of his own. However, it's important to make HIM do the work as if he begins to leech your strength or take it for granted, when you take him off of training wheels, he'll fall, get scared, and never ride the bike again.

Be sure to stand by and be there in everything he's unsure about but make sure he does things himself and that he WANTS to do them. Once he realizes that if he continues on a positive course, being institutionalized is less of a concern. In fact, his own paranoia may act in his favor where he seeks help in order to avoid being taken somewhere. This will be a great chance for him to open the door to people willing to help and people whom he trusts.

But to be the devil's advocate, there are chlidren involved. And it comes down to a judgement call. Reporting him and forcing him into rehabilitation may damage him but save the children from some problems down the road. Unfortunately, not everyone is savable in a convenient amount of time. That's where you should probably contact a professional and get some information on what you should do as a friend and find some practices that will help.

Answer 3

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Answer 4

if she/he needs help and a mental floor is where he/she should be no harm or her/him will not have their childern taken away from them if your the only one they trust let them know you will take their kids.try to make them understand if they do not get in care treatment.they are playing with fire if they are reported. they could lose their children.and as far as you just keep on doing being trusted by them. good luck and god bless.

Answer 5

You could say that it is for his own good and it would greatly benefit his family.

Answer 6

they should take medication for depression if they dint take any and try to socialize more with there kids and friends

Answer 7

you need to report him...he is putting his kids at risk....if anything should happen to his kids while in his care and he is not coping ...he can loose them ...good luck