how should I handle my child?

Question

so, this is the second time I've caught my 6 year old girl fooling around with the neighbors 6 year old girl. they closed the door and where topless laying in bed together.

should I punish my girl for that? this is the second time. first time, 2 months ago, I talked about it with her, and seperated them for 1 month.

the neighbors kid seems to instigate it, my child just follows.

I don't want to make her feel bad for exploring, but I wish she would realize the acts she does, might not be right. I want her to only do this with people that respect her. the neighbors kid does not respect anyone it seems like.

I need pointers and would like answers from actual parents.

first, let me say that they were pretending to have babies and they where feeding them from their bossoms. the babies were represented by small plastic animals. but neighbors girl was laying down and my girl was making the animals act. The thing that upsets me is that they closed the door, which is never allowed. That tells me they felt like what they where doing might be wrong.

I don't wish to crush their human desire to explore, birth and have relationships, but I don't know how to seperate that from the closed door idea when addressing the situation

Answer 1

First of all, I think this is normal behavior for kids this age. You seem most bothered by their desire for privacy. If they are role playing nursing their babies, there is no reason why they should feel it is something that requires a closed door. Breasts are there (by God or nature, your call) for feeding babies. No need for shame. As long as they aren't acting out adult sexual behavior, I wouldn't worry about it, if they are within 3 yrs age. They will get tired of the game soon IF you don't make it some kind of naughty bad things that they are punished for by being denied the company of peers. Tell them both that The Rule is, the door is always open. I have this rule for my son. It's a good rule, and when they are teens, and have boys over, you will be glad you've enforced the rule from the beginning.

Answer 2

At 6 years old I don't think the concept of respect would come into play. They are curious and it is perfectly normal. I would be concerned if there was a big age difference but as there is not I would just sit the girls down and explain that what they are doing is not acceptable behavior, that those area of their bodies are private and only moms and dads and doctors are allowed to see them until they are older . Explain to them that you know hey are curious but if they have any questions to ask an adult. Then I would have a no closed door policy WIth the girls.

Answer 3

if they are the same age, and just exploring, i would let it go...it is sooo increadibly normal....even if the neighbor girl seems disrespectful....if you teach your daughter to respect herself, then she will not let people run her over later in life, for now, she is still just discovering others personalities and this will not play a part later....i was totally submissive as a child...and also a follower, but this did not carry on into teenage years or adulthood, and my parents never made a big deal out of situations like this... i think it would give your daughter shameful ideas if you dwell on it too much.....she is going to be exploring for many more years, and possibly with other people as well...she will be okay....it is natural

Answer 4

Sounds like normal acting out what kids see on a daily basis...why would you punish children for mimicing what they see their parents doing? You might want to speak with the other child's parents but sepearating them isn't going to do anything other than make them feel that what they have done is "bad" and make them want to explore it further.

Answer 5

separate indefinetly, put her on punishment and teach her that is unacceptable behavior for a child, obvious this is the second time around, I understand kids wanting to explore, but parent if you can help it, do something about it, hopefully you have gone over to there house and had a discussion about it in front of the kids. dont condone this act. kids are subjected to a lot of negativity, but the kids who make smart decisions are taught at a young age and it starts NOW!!!

Answer 6

i think that you should start questioning what she may have seen, or who she has seen doing what because kids had to have seen this type of thing to know this(my opinion) but i would not spank her but tell her that this behavior is inappropriate, and that is not the way that a little girl should behave. i would seriously start to pay attention to what she is watching on television who babysits her etc. not saying that you do not already do that but usually when question such as this one arise it is usually something that was exposed to them. hope that this helps

Answer 7

use good knowledge and a firm hand. be fair at all times.