For Jehovah's witnesses only, have you ever noticed How hard it is finding someone to have a relationship with

Question

Im a Witness and Im young im 18 gonna be 19 in july. And I always said I wanted to be married or at least in a serious relationship by 20, I have found like 1 person but we already dated when we were younger, I think it is sooooo hard to find someone to have a relationship with their is like no one, I'm in FL maybe thats why lol....have you guys ever noticed this?

I also think that maybe this is a protection from Jehovah, maybe im not ready or w/e.

I am not trying to rush into anything but i mean i believe that every human being wants to feel love and not just friendly love or family love its different when you have a girlfriend or boyfriend who loves you.
I feel thats what every human wants to feel.

THis is for the Non jw's why are you posting in a place that says for witnesses only?

With that said. to adress trinitybombshella, thank you for showing me how the world thinks, Im not interested in sex, and I would never get married just to have sex. and I have been a witness all my life.
So know what your talking about before you speak. I would never date outside my religion, and don't want to. Just because you know or knew 1 or 2 people who did don't base that on every single JW.

Answer 1

when the right girl will come along, Jehovah will let you know. be careful on here. people will take nasy about Jehovah Witnesses. don't be a rush. my youngest son is 25 and has not met anyone.

Answer 2

Not a lack of want, but, as u urself, said "Maybe this is a protection from Jehovah, maybe I'm not ready or w/e", u know THIS could Very Well be true.
Do take it to Jehovah, He already knows what u need...n what u want. From Adam He saw that it was not good for man to b alone.
Ask for His will to be done, Not yours.
U know He will answer u.
You r still So Very Young, have patience...maybe ur future wife is not yet in the truth???
If u wait until u r about the age of 30, u'll be more mature.
And, more readily equipped to take on a wife.
And, family, if that is the case, (children that is).

Also, take a second...to discern ur age, and ur future wife's age. i.e. ur 19 this yr., if u wait until ur 30; 11 yrs., if ur wife is 6 yrs., younger than u...right now she'd only be 13.
Puts a little perspective on it, wouldn't u say?

Answer 3

I don't know about other countries, but I live in the Caribbean. So basically you'll find a mix of interracial marriages. I know of couples where the spouses are Indians, Africans, Chinese, Caucasian, Mulatto, Dougla (half Indian half African) and so on. For instance, there's one couple in my hall where the brother is Indian and his wife is African (mixed with other things but dominantly). So there isn't really much of the 'race card' playing there. And taking into consideration as well, everyone has their personal preferences. I know other countries, some people will have prejudice against other races, let us be honest and realistic. We aren't perfect. So what you have observed *may* be true, I have no idea. I don't live in the U.S. but I know where I live, you see a lot of interracial couples.

Answer 4

I totally agree with what amor said...this info is just too personal to be putting online and you're going to attract apostates with this question.

Before you put a timeline on your love life, you need to ask yourself questions like "Am I ready for marriage? Can I take care of responsibilities like a car, a house/apartment, bills? Do I have a good spiritual routine? Do I understand the responsibilities of being the head of the house?" etc.

There are articles on the CD ROM and in a few recent Awake mags that can help you come to a decision about you being ready.

You shouldn't restrict yourself to a certain age...if you don't find love during that time, you'll disappoint yourself or worse, blame Jehovah for it.

Make sure that you count the cost before you head down the aisle; marriage is serious and is supposed to last forever. (Gen 2:24; Mal 2:16; Luke 14:28)

Answer 5

Since you want to follow the world in wanting to have a relationship at such a young age, perhaps you will listen to the wisdom of the world.

Studies show that the strongest relationships work when the couple are both over the age of 24. This is the point when females reach full maturity, and the woman is the anchor and stabilizer in any relationship. Males don't reach full maturity until age 30, and I'm sure you can figure out who was the best example of that. He was not mature enough to leave home and begin his preaching work until age 30.

Now, I knowing trying to make a teenager understand that patience is beneficial is nearly an impossible task, but that is what you need to do. I would tell you this whether you were a JW or not. With nearly 20 years of working with single fathers, I'm speaking from experience.

Answer 6

My son is 25 and has not found a mate yet either. When you think about it there is eternity to find someone.

I asked one of my elders a question...his answer was make it to the new system first, concentrate on that even if you have to endure your situation until then. We are here on earth such an infinitesimal time compared to eternity.

Jehovah knows what you need and he will answer your prayers. In the meantime serve him whole souled.

One experience: A young regular pioneer brother 19 from our hall went to Louisiana to do some Katrina volunteer work for 3 months just recently. He came back engaged to a reg. pioneer sister. Like you he looked everywhere. She is from Washington State and he from Missouri. Jehovah provides.

Answer 7

Your still very young. Don't rush it! That's how people make mistakes. You need to now what you really want in a mate. I live in Florida too. We have a lot of teenagers in our hall, but only a few that are 19 almost twenty and only one of them is dating anyone. I think dating as a teenager is too young. Are you able to support a wife and provide a home?
Are you mature enough to handle the emotional needs of another person?

The best thing to do is pray on the matter and be persistent and see what happens. Be patient, marriage is for life.

Answer 8

There are more women then men. And the girls have got to fit a certain desired profile. The pretty rich girls that have the right theocratic attitude get married first. The guys can usually marry whomever they want especially if they have reached an important position in the congregation. If someone is chosing a mate, they are encouraged to check the field service hours and see how zealous they are by what you do and don't do. Many JWs have to travel far and wide to find someone they really want. Eventually, if you've been unsuccessful, you'll start to consider whatever woman happens to be single regardless of whether your compatible or not. It's better to be married then be tempted, right? Am I wrong? If you want to be a good JW, you've got to be really really really patient. Sure, it helps to spend your downtime making yourself a better person so you will be a better mate. I don't know if Jehovah has anything to do with that. If you had found the right one by now, you wouldn't be asking. The more people you get to know, the better your chances are.

Answer 9

Hello there..

I am going to have to agree with what some of the poeple have said here

1. This is not a place to get advice about something so serious
a. Speak to your elders in the congregation
b. Brothers that have been married for a long time
c. and your dad/ or a man that you trust
2. Marriage is sooo sacred. instead of looking.
a. Pray about it. constantly. you will get your answer.
c. think about why you want to get married
d. if you rush into something you will be doing it for the wrong reasons. Have patience.

AGAPE

Answer 10

I used to feel the same way as you and i met many sisters in the organization but they were usually the wrong people. They had not matured yet relationship wise or spiritually.

They said they wanted a serious relationship but then tried to pressure me into things that were reserved for marraige if you get my drift.

Anyways i wisley left those unsafe situations and focused on my spirituality and after a couple of years (i was 23 by this time) i met my wife.

Answer 11

There is nothing wrong with being in a stable relationship by the time you are 20, however, being married it a big responsibility. Our brains aren't even developed fully at the age of 20 and people do change around that time usually. You are still a child. Act your age and don't try to grow up so fast. Just be yourself around other people. You should eventually find someone who likes you. Meet people in the church if that is your thing. Travel around to different congregations to see who is out there.