A foul mouthed, ugly,woman walks into a large posh store dragging two dirty brats with her. The doorman says to her "Good morning Madam, what beautiful children you have are they twins?" "Stupid b@st@rd" she says, "The girl is 7 and the boy is 3,why would you think they were twins you ********?". The dorman replies sincerely, "Because I cannot imagine anyone sh@gging you twice!"
2007-05-10 06:09:49 · 12 answers · asked by ? 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
....a classic!!!
A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The man groaned but didn't budge. The usher became impatient. "Sir, if you don't get up from there I'm going to have to call the manager." Again, the man just groaned, which infuriated the usher who turned and marched briskly back up the aisle in search of his manager.
In a few moments, both the usher and the manager returned and stood over the man. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move him, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what's your name?" "Sam," the man moaned. "Where ya from, Sam?" With pain in his voice Sam replied "The balcony."
2007-05-10 06:16:18 · answer #1 · answered by Chris R 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Hehehe, Good one. Here are some from my side.
An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, "Have you ever been arrested?" He answered, "No."
The next question, intended for people who had answered in the affirmative to the last one, was "Why?" The applicant answered it anyway: "Never got caught."
Employer to applicant: "In this job we need someone who is responsible."
Applicant: "I'm the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
"Young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work?"
"I ought to be able to. I've had ten different jobs in four months."
When TITANIC was sinking, a man asks a Sardar, how
far is LAND?
Sardar: 2kms....
Man jumps into THE Sea & asks: Which way?
Sardar: DOWNWARDS.
Nurse: Miss, wake up. It's time for your medicine
Patient: (sleepily) : what medicine?
Nurse: Sleeping pills
Teacher to Student: A=B, B=C, So A=C, Give me an example.
Student: I Love You, You Love Your Daughter, So I Love Your Daughter.
Interviewer: just imagine your in 3rd floor, it caught fire and how will you escape?
Man: its simple. I will stop my imagination!!!
When a man was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver adjusted mirror.
Man shouted, "You are trying to see my wife? Sit back. I will drive.
One tourist from U.S.A. asked to an Indian: Any great man born in this village???
He replies: no sir, only small Babies!!!
The maid answered the phone but she held the phone upside down.
Maid: Hello? Hello?
Homeowner: Reverse it!
Maid: llohe, llohe?
2007-05-10 06:40:04 · answer #2 · answered by Ankit Kumar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Golden Oldie.
2007-05-10 06:12:43 · answer #3 · answered by dteacher1uk 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes i love it girl you rocks and good job lol 10/10.
2007-05-10 06:27:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That woman was Britney Spears wasn't it?
2007-05-10 06:16:34 · answer #5 · answered by Phat MD 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Very good.
2007-05-10 06:20:35 · answer #6 · answered by quatt47 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahahahahah
2007-05-10 06:22:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha that was funny!
2007-05-10 06:25:32 · answer #8 · answered by lose_it 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
FUNNY!!!
2007-05-10 06:23:20 · answer #9 · answered by lauren 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
real nice...
2007-05-10 06:37:09 · answer #10 · answered by DarshaN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋