Please help me... !!!! :(?

Question

I have a crush on my boyfriends dad.

Like a big big big crush, ive had "wet dreams" about him and everytime i see him i want to have sex with him. Hes so hot. And im not just attracted to his looks but his personality is amazing. Hes funny and smart, sweet and thoughtful and hes always helping me out of somesort of problem.

Im 16 and hes like 35.
I moved in with my boyfriend a couple of weeks ago and ever since then the feelings have gotten stronger for his dad. (yes my bf still lives with his dad) He doesnt have a wife and i always think about us together. I feel so bad, i feel like im cheatting on my boyfriend (which im not) but i cant help how i feel.

What should i do ?

Answer 1

Well, this is kind of interesting.

The first thing you should consider is whether or not you still like your boyfriend. If you're crazy about his dad, and not as crazy about him, you should break up with him. There's no point continuing a relationship that has no real feeling in it. If you are attracted to both of them, then it gets much more complicated.

It's rare for 16 year old girls to be attracted to 35 year old men (aside from celebrities) but if this is something you want to pursue, it will have to wait until you reach adulthood. If you become involved with an overage male, you could both get in trouble.

In the end, what you should do now depends on how strongly you feel for your boyfriend. In a sense, it is wrong to stay with him if your true emotions lie with another person. If you care about him enough, you should consider telling him. It will hurt his feelings, but it's better for him to know the truth about his relationship with you. If breaking up with him will help you feel less guilty, then you should do it. Why stay with a guy who is only the secondary love of your life?

I'm sorry if my answer doesn't help enough; this is kind of a complicated situation. Good luck!

Answer 2

How in the world did you end up moving in with your boyfriend???

The man is 35, he knows you are pining away over him...men can smell this type of thing. Hopefully, he is not the type of Father Figure that would take advantage of this situation.

You need to talk to another adult outside the situation about how you feel and what is going on and how you are going to handle these feelings. You obviously can't ACT on your feelings but being young you are going to get impulsive and all Daddy-O has to do is give you one look longer than should be look and you are gonna do what comes natural.

You need to recognize that the situation can't go anywhere with Dad. Get out of the relationship with son and find some place else to stay.

Answer 3

I would ignore my feelings for my boyfriends dad. It can only lead to pain for everyone if you follow through. You are too young for this guy to begin with and it would CRUSH your boyfriend in SO MANY WAYS if you went for it. What....are you just expecting sex and that's it? That isn't how it works out. You're in this guys HOME. You need to respect him and the fact that he is your boyfriends father. You don't want to hurt these people do you? That is all you would be doing if you come on to this guy.
It's perfectly normal to be attracted to a man who is older than you, especially a father figure.
I know you are 16 but putting the father into a position like that is unfair and dangerous. He risks losing a whole lot by getting involved with you.

He would lose the respect of his son and their relationship would crumble.

He would lose the respect of the community and people would whisper about him.

He could even lose his job.

Even though you're legal (at least you're legal by the standards in the state I live in) but you are BARELY so.
Law enforcement would look at him in a whole new way.

No man with decent values would even go there.You are setting yourself up for a whole lot of grief. Plus...what about your boyfriend? Don't you really care about him? I wonder. If you truly cared about him you would shove the feelings for his father completely aside and forget them. You would destroy any trust he has in you.
What about your own family? what would a relationship like that do to your family?

If you can't stop thinking about this man and you feel like you can't control yourself, I suggest you move out.
I hope that if you do throw yourself on him that he is a decent man and does what is right. You are his sons girlfriend!

DO THE RIGHT THING

Answer 4

You need to move out is what you need to do. You have a recipe for trouble.
What about your bf? He doesnt deserve to be betrayed that way.
What about self control or self dignity.
Did you not have a dad or what?
What you are feeling is normal, you are teen at the stage your hormones are popping. What you need to remember is to not react on them. Especially in this case!!!! Hopefully this dad isnt going threw mid age crisis. If he is you both are in trouble.
And HELLO!!!! you are cheating on your bf. Emtional is cheating too. Hello youngster, kick back and stay cool....or move out and do not intertain the idea. Stop intertaining it otherwise you will go forth. GOod luck.

Answer 5

Nothing, you are 16 and he is 35 and he is your boyfriends dad. His dad would have more sense then to go out with a 16 year old so just get over it, its never gonna happen. Yes it is cheating.

Answer 6

u have a boyfriend and his dad is not, so u should try not 2 think about his dad a lot, He is 35 and ur 16 that is not a hot couple that is sick,u should try and think about this yourself.Hangout with your boyfriend more and i think u would stop thinking about his dad.DON'T WORRY U CAN DO IT!!

Answer 7

im sorry BUT i think you should stay a way really sorry but 16+35=bad choice you have to realize there will be hotter nicer guys out there my sis is like 14 date 16 i say thats as old as you could probely go 2-4 years older!

Answer 8

give it a few years --- even if he may be interested you are too young ---- dont let people dissuade you because of the age difference -- its not about age its about feelings and maturity --- BUT im sorry to say you are a little young --- if what you feel is lasting then wait --- at least until 18 or better yet your 20's -- if you still feel the same then talk to him --- best wishes

Answer 9

I think you need you need to think about what you are doing, because if you act on your feelings you could ruin a lot of lives. Use some self control and understand that it isn't right. Wait until you are of age to pursue someone older.

Answer 10

Uh oh, this is hard. Try to turn your affections elsewhere- because if you act on these it could mess up your current living situation and hurt everyone in the process. Most likely it will pass. Good luck! I know we can't choose who we have feelings for and who we don't.