How would I counsel someone who cut themselves?

Question

Why would someone cut their body? Any insight into this issue is appreciated.

Answer 1

People often cut themselves to externalize an internal pressure or conflict. Doing it actually releases endorphines into the bloodstream, which make a person feel good, sometimes even euphoric or "high". The best way to counsel this person is to try to figure out what the internal conflict is and work with them on that. Try not to be be condescending or patronizing, as this will often add to the problems which the person is already struggling with. Don't tell them that they are "sick", or "in need of psychiatric help", instead try to provide them with emotional support and let them know that they can open up to you in confidentiality, so that they will trust you and your advice.

Answer 2

There is a lot of very solid literature and research on this topic. If you are REALLY interested, there is a book called "Cutters" i think or "Cutting". I've had several clients who engage in this behavior. It's one of those things which can stem from a thousand things. Some people who cut are attempting to feel physical pain, so their mental pain can be temporarily abated. It can also serve as a way to reduce anxiety. It can be a habit, almost like a drug habit, where the person is "addicted" to the rush. It could be a cry for help, this person may need psychiatric intervention. It does them no favors for everyone to keep this a secret. If this person is a minor, you might want to offer to help them seek counseling or tell their family. If this person is an adult, you need to find out if they are suicidal, or have a plan. If they are a danger to themselves or others, you are OBLIGATED to get them help by calling 911, or taking them to the emergency room.

Answer 3

First of all, therapy is the best way to go. Usually, self-injury is accompanied by depression and/or mental disorders.
It is important to find out why she or he is cutting.

If you want to help somebody then find out a lot of information about this subject.
Here is my favorite site:
http://www.self-injury.net/

Self-injury is not done for attention. Most kids do it for attention, but the act of self-injury is to take away their emotional pain and replace it with physical pain.
This is addictive, because the body releases endorphins while this is happening.

Don't expect the person to automatically quit. If they do it again don't yell at them. Encourage them by saying you went 1 month (for example) without cutting yourself.

Here are some good ideas for the person to distract themselves when they feel the urge to self harm.

Cry
Watch tv, read a book
exercises
talk to friends, family
punch a pillow
hold an ice cube in your hand until it melts
draw, paint, color

Tell your friend to try to distract themselves.
However, it is going to up to the person to decide to quit.
Just remember to always support this person at all times.

Edit:
I forgot to add that it's important to find somebody who deals with self injury (therapist).

Answer 4

I'm sure you're just trying to help, but unless you're trained in psychology, you really should not get involved. People cut themselves because the physical pain takes their minds off their mental pain. It's self-hatred made manifest through the act of mutilation. They think they are worthless and treat their bodies as such. I suggest you counsel this person to seek professional help - they're going to need it.

Answer 5

This may seem odd, but watch the movie "The Secretary". It'll give you an entertaining introduction into sadism and some of the motivators that brings one to cut themselves. It is a known and documented disorder.

If you are new to the topic, you really need to educate yourself. "Cutters" are often socially deviant in other ways as well.

Answer 6

I have a friend who cuts themselves and like i just say anytime that you feel like your going to cut yourself call me and she does but really all you can do is just be there for them and tell them that you care about them but if it is really serious you should probably get them some help.

Answer 7

People who cut themselves have a mental disorder. They need to be in therapy.

It's probably too much for a friend to help with.

Answer 8

Unless you are a mental health professional, you should not counsel anyone who cuts themselves. This is a complicated disease that religion would probably only aggravate.

Answer 9

I think they are hurting inside and cutting makes the hurt inside go away. They are crying out for attention and need lots of love and support.

Answer 10

Usually the person is dealing with some deeper issue and you would have to discover what it is. It could be that they feel like they need to punish themselves for some reason. Maybe their parents told them they were no good or something like that. It could be that they have some totally different issue. Spiritually it could be that they have an evil spirit that is seeking to lead them to commit suicide.