my ex and i were together for 3 months, then i broke it off. he got together with this other girl, who ended up cheating on him and treating him bad, and they lasted 3 months. he started talking to me again like how he used to, and i started to really like him again. he was saying how he wish he never went with her, and he shouldve tried harder to make things work with me, and then we were supposed to get back together. but then his ex asked him back. he tried to keep both of us on hold for him but then i told him that he had to choose. and he chose her. i was hurt. how could he say all those things about how we should try again and how bad she treated him only to get back with her? even his friends came up to me to say he was dumb for doing that, and i wouldve been the better choice. but then my ex and his ex broke up. hes asking me back again saying the same things he did before. but i dont know now. i know i really wanted to before, but i cant get the fact that he chose her over me.
2007-04-22 00:57:54 · 19 answers · asked by ajakhatarinaak47 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
should i take him back anyways??
im not in love.
its just that i know love takes more than a few months.
but can i even trust him??
what do you think??
2007-04-22 00:59:08 · update #1
It would be different if you were in love with him. You're instincts are correct. If he chose someone over you once, there's a chance he will do it again. When you take someone back in such a situation, you lose a bit of your own identity. You're sending a message that he can hurt you, and get away with it. For purposes of preserving your own self-respect, you need to pass on this one.
2007-04-22 01:18:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
How much did you like him the first place (when things were going well)? I think that this is the key question as to whether or not you should take him back.
You cannot blame him for taking this other girl on if you left him the first time around, however his later conduct has been unfortunate. Whether or not he actually "chose her over you" or was simply trying to hedge his bets (given that you left him) is a matter that might be up for debate.
To sum it all up though. You had a short relationship with him. Then you left him. Why? If nothing to do with that reason has changed then don't take him back because the results will be the same.
After that he found someone else, that didn't work either, and he acted a little stupidly (although undertsandably perhaps) in relation both of you. So if you are happy he has changed enough for you to want him AND you are prepared to forgive him for his unfortunate conduct, then you could take him back if you wanted to.
2007-04-22 01:06:54 · answer #2 · answered by a1mandrake 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you should not take him back. He has hurt your heart more than once. He keeps coming back to you because he knows you still like him and he knows he has a hold on you.
He likes that power. I would encourage you to let him go. There is someone else who God has out there for you who is more respectful, more kind, more of who is going to treat you with the respect you deserve.
Why take someone back who you would be constantly wondering if where he might be or if he was talking to the other ex again? Why put your body through that stress again? He has already showed you that he cannot be trusted.
Let him go and open your heart for someone who is better for you. You are much stronger than he thinks you are. I am sending hugs and prayers for your courage and strength and wisdom your way. God Bless.
2007-04-22 01:05:26 · answer #3 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you left him in the beginning it must not have been right for you no matter what the reason was. Yes sometimes after being apart from someone you can realise you both made a mistake and then really commit and have a happy future,sadly this did not happen for you he is a liar and a jerk and please don't take him back i only see heart ache and misery. Go and get some one you have a chance of it working with not this two timing rat. and all of this in just 3 months no way move on.
2007-04-22 01:08:01 · answer #4 · answered by deb m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my God! Don't even listen to his words anymore. That most be so hurtful Hun. I would keep my heart to myself. His actions create complete mistrust and wonder, if he can do it once he can do it again. And what he has done isn't a small thing. He made you believe you were getting back together and then he runs away. No fair game!
You can find better than such..
Good luck what ever your choice be.
2007-04-22 01:05:35 · answer #5 · answered by Tas 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To start with, you already had a shaky relationship with your ex, thus you broke up with him. He didn't exert an effort to make the relationship work. How would you trust him now? Do you even think that this time everything will be fine? Wake up to reality.
Girlfriend, your ex belongs to the past. Let him be!
2007-04-22 01:12:37 · answer #6 · answered by thatsraven 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is there a valid reason why you broke with him? Maybe he chose the other girl because he was afraid you will broke with him again. Well, if you think you broke with him is your fault. Then, you can accept him again. This time, you must be careful not to do the same mistake again.
2007-04-22 01:10:57 · answer #7 · answered by cutiefy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you could be happy with this guy after all you've been through.It's not fair of him to play games with you and this other girl.Your life will be miserable with this guy as he can't seem to make up his mind as to what he wants.How can you trust him that the will get back with you then do the same thing again..find someone else, you deserve the best.
Good luck!
2007-04-22 01:07:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Respect yourself. Do NOT take him back. It would be disrespectful to you to take him back.
There are so many guys out there. You do not want to go for a guy who has put you last and chose someone else over you.
End it. Minimize your contact with him. He isn't a true friend either. He wants both of you.
2007-04-22 01:03:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
No, nonononononononononononononononononono!
You will always be second choice if you take him back once. If you take him back now, he will do this again and again and again. It's a form of abuse, and you need to stop it before it gets started.
2007-04-22 01:05:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋