Daughter a letter and tell her some positive,good things about her Dad...I never met her,and he and her Mom were divorced..I know he didnt see her although he paid child support and they lived in separate states..but he was a Brother/friend to me,and she is 13 and I feel she should know things like her Dad was an honorable man,a Gentleman,maybe some of the things he enjoyed doing,the music he liked,etc...should I do this?..I feel he would want me to,to honor his memory in this way...suggestions?
2007-04-20 23:02:00 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I am open to suggestions not only if I should do this,but how I should write it...tell her about my friendship with him,how we met,why I considered him more then just a friend but as close as a brother?..or just who I am and what he liked and stuff?...simple or involved?...one suggestion I have gotten said she might prefer a long detailed letter so she can reread it over and over...I am a man of experience but limited knowledge of what a 13 yr old gilr who didnt know her Dad would want to hear from a stranger....
2007-04-20 23:08:14 · update #1
Thanks everybody...a mutual friend has agreed to speak to her Mom and let me know if it is ok...I will send it to the Mom and ask her to decide when to let the daughter have it...Thank you all again
2007-04-21 15:09:30 · update #2
I think your idea is just beautiful and it's so nice that you want to honour your friend in this way. I would imagine this young girl is feeling very confused as she did not know her father. Make it indepth, give her a true sense of who he was and how you felt about him. The longer the better. Funny stories, his likes and dislikes, anything and everything. It would make her very sad to read it initially, thinking of what she has missed out on, not knowing her father, but in time I'm sure she would love it.
2007-04-20 23:22:06 · answer #1 · answered by j81s79j06 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, my sincere condolences on your loss.This must be a very difficult time for you.It is obvious that this person was a great friend to you and its nice to see that even in your own grief you can see past it to think of this poor child who didn't know her father and now unfortunately never will have the chance to.I think its a great idea.The only problem I could see is maybe her mother might object.Perhaps you should discuss it with her first and explain what you want to do.
2007-04-21 03:24:48 · answer #2 · answered by sadhbhbeag 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm very sorry to your tale. I understand the discontentment of determining anyone ended their possess existence. First of all, you can't blame your self for this. He was once a huge boy -- he made his possess offerings, and that is what he selected. You had an extended speak with him, you attempted, and he determined to do it besides. You can not preserve anyone alive in opposition to their will. Secondly, you can't understand that you just might have made a change. What, you might have positioned it off for a couple of months, such as you did earlier than? He knew you have been there to arrive out. He had your telephone quantity. You referred to as and left a message, he in no way referred to as you again, depart it at that. Thirdly, you can not reside your existence gambling what if. If I'd recognized X, I might have performed Y. The factor is, you did not understand. I grew up looking my dad abuse his frame with alcohol and junkfood. He died of headaches from middle ailment and diabetes. Was I to understand, all the ones years, to take the ones matters clear of him? It's no longer your activity to understand the longer term. All you'll be able to cross on is the potential you've at present. As harsh because it sounds, your buddy knew he had assets, and he selected to disregard them. It's no longer your fault he made that option. I understand it'll take time to recover from the discomfort. Take relief that he knew he might have referred to as you. And use this as a catalyst to cherish the folks you continue to have. Turn this into whatever confident. God bless. .
2016-09-05 18:55:26 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is a great idea. Very sweet.
Make sure you address it to her Mother with a note explaining what the letter is and invite her to read over it first. She will be the best person to decide when and how to give it to her daughter. It may be a very good thing for the girl but it could also be very painful, especially so close to his death.
Good luck. :)
2007-04-21 01:20:30 · answer #4 · answered by Marschick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send her a bereavement card and say how sorry you are her dad has passed away then say you have included a letter of your memories and friendship with her dad then do as you say in your question.~~
2007-04-20 23:12:53 · answer #5 · answered by burning brightly 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the best way to approach this is to just write from your heart & don't over think it...Just write....
I know if it was my Dad I'd want to know more about him seeing as you wouldn't have the chance to ever talk to him again... :-(
2007-04-20 23:12:29 · answer #6 · answered by MUff1N 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋