Well my son is the first born and now that theres another baby everyone ignores him and he tells me that his feelings hurt i know he cant always have the attention but i also feel that they dont try to give him any attention or try to make him feel good what do i do?
2007-04-20 16:42:25 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
First off, how old is he? I'm assuming under 5....enlist his help with caring for his sibling!! Its all in the wording - "Can you get a blanket for your little brother? He's cold". And when he brings it to you "WOW! You are so helpful! What a great big brother you are! Little Mikey is so lucky to have you as his brother". Make him feel important, like he is a very crucial part of his sibling's life - that he is a part of the family and not at all being replaced by the baby, but the family is growing. Talk about how much fun they will have together once the baby is walking, talking, etc. Also, tell him all about how much attention he got as a new baby-he obviously can't remember. Have him open all the baby presents for his sibling. As far as your friends & family go, bring it to their attention that he feels left out-but not in his presence. When they oh and ah over the new baby, say "yes, and he just loves his big brother! And Big brother has been so helpful, I am so proud of him." I'm sure they have no idea what they are doing.
Unfortunately, new babies are a part of life. Make sure to spend quality time with your firstborn, but he does have to understand that the baby's needs can't wait. Since he is a big boy, his can, even though its hard, its part of being a big boy. Good luck, I know its not easy.
2007-04-20 17:00:38 · answer #1 · answered by Erin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to have some alone time with your oldest and focus on things that are important to him. You may also want to try to get him involved with the baby as a sense of closeness may lessen the hurt he feels. When "they" are around (the ones who are giving him no attention) be sure to bring up your oldest and mention the wonderful things he has done, how helpful he is, or bring up his recent accomplishments. Bring him into the spotlight some...even if nobody else starts to pay more attention to him, he will know he has at least one huge fan (you) and that may soothe his feelings some.
2007-04-20 17:41:52 · answer #2 · answered by Starshine 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when your new baby is sleeping. Spend some one on one time with your first son. This will make him feel special. Also when you do things with the new baby, try to find a way to let him help. When your giving him a bath, have him hand you the soap, or the washcloth. Something little like that will probably make him feel speical and less left out.
2007-04-20 17:13:28 · answer #3 · answered by Amy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I told everyone that came to my house that my son (the newborn) would not notice if they talked to him first, but my daughter (age 2 at the time) would know. Before they could see the baby, they had to talk to my girl.
2007-04-20 16:55:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-26 01:48:51 · answer #5 · answered by crupi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a mom and son date. Take him out to lunch and to the movies or mini golfing. Make one day a month just for him and you.
2007-04-20 16:51:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell people that if they want to play with your children that the have to teat them the same or they don't get to any more. also when they are playing with the baby you play with your son and make him know you love him to
2007-04-20 16:48:34 · answer #7 · answered by sexy mama 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think Pink9364' s answer is brilliant. I've never even heard of that, but it's the thing to do for sure.
2007-04-20 16:46:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
who is they?
leave the baby with "them"
and spend time alone with your older son.
2007-04-20 16:46:28 · answer #9 · answered by Sufi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have a big brother party just for him.... make sure you spend one on one time with him with no baby.. or have a relative do the same.
2007-04-20 16:45:03 · answer #10 · answered by pink9364 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋