i wish i can get along with her, like i get along with my dad. i made a previous mistake in my life with my ex and she doesnt want to get over it, and that just keeps us fighting. i just want to get along with her.
2007-04-20 14:59:07 · 15 answers · asked by Natalie R 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Tell her you realize you made a huge mistake and you've learned from it and will not make the same mistake twice. Tell her to trust you. Let her know where you are going, who with, and what time you'll be back - so she doesn't worry. You have to earn her trust again. Be patient, she loves and cares for you.
2007-04-20 15:04:10 · answer #1 · answered by Pixel 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Heart to heart talks are always the best. Be tactful and speak from your heart how you want to make & leave some good memories between the two of you. The past is just that. It cannot be changed so what would she have you do about that now in order to end this subject. Ask her ??
I have 2 grown daughters, and seems with daughters especially in their teen years, there is a rival type relationship going on with them.Mothers and daughters, there are books written about the relationships of them. My 3 grown sons were a lot easier to raise because they aimed to please where as my daughters had this attitude. They are all married to fine spouses today. Couldn't have picked better mates for any of them. They did good.
What I want to say to you is, its hard to be a good parent. You guys didn't come with directions. ha
I don't know how old you are, and it helps on here, if you know what age you are directing your answer to. It is easier to get along with Dad, he's not around you as much. Fathers are not as involved usally as the Mothers are in the everyday living. I hope some of us here have helped you. I tried. Blessings~`jill
2007-04-20 15:33:25 · answer #2 · answered by Jill ❤'s U.S.A 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not give your age--but I imagine you are a teen ager...so the issue seems to be your lack of good sense and you used poor judgement with a guy friend. First off--your folks are hoping that you mature and make proper decisions as you get older---the better you are at decision making, the more freedom you are allowed to have. Sounds like you made a big mistake and it will take a lot of time for them to trust you again---SO LISTEN HERE---spend each day being good and acting nice----just STOP talking about the whole incident--it is done and past--can't do anything about it. You need to regain the trust that you lost. Keep the conversations easy for a while--stop talking about that stupid mistake---you only keep reminding your mom of the incident--and the disappointment you caused. Millions of kids make mistakes--we all do---and we are responsible for our actions. Learn to make the most of a mistake--and don't make it again. Get over it and you mom will most likely start talking again. Smile, relax and good luck
2007-04-20 15:31:08 · answer #3 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a list of the things that you and your parents fight about the most.
Identify what it is that gets you so upset or angry - are you mad that your parents disagree with you, or are you upset that they can't/won't see your point of view?
Decide on a FAIR compromise - a resolution that you can live with and that you think your parents' will accept. NOTE: A compromise means you give up some of your demands - it does not mean that you get your way.
Write down your proposed compromise and read it aloud at least three times to see how it sounds.
Set up a time to talk to your parents, do not just bring it up over dinner but make an actual appointment and tell them that you have an important proposal to make.
Bring your notes with you to the meeting so you can stay on track if/when emmotions get high. You may even want to consider reading the note to your parents like a speech.
Before talking to your parents, take a few deep breaths and think calming thoughts. Make a promise to yourself that you will not raise your voice or get angry even if your parents "turn up the volume."
When you have presented your case take another deep breath and let your parents talk. Really listen to what your parents have to say. Even if you do not like what they are saying hold back your anger and keep your ears and mind open.
Avoid shutting down or growing frustrated. Avoid interrupting them or jumping in with a rebuttal. Just listen and absorb what they say.If your parents reject your proposal, stay focused and avoid getting emmotional. Thank them for their time and express your disappointment that you could not reach a compromise.If your parents accept your proposal, be grateful and assure them that you will not let them down. Then do everything necessary to show them they made the right decision in going along with you.
Whatever the outcome, be sure to do what your parents ask of you. By going along with their wishes you build trust and show your maturity which in turn may make them more willing to relax their stand at a future date.
If the topic is a very sensitive one and you still can't see eye to eye, ask your parents what they need from you in order for them to consider your proposal.
Make a vow to give them what they need and ask them if you can agree to revisit the subject in a few weeks time.
If the outcome disappoints you, do not throw a fit. Go to your room and write your feelings in a journal or go outside and ride your bike or punch a pillow to blow off steam
2007-04-20 15:08:06 · answer #4 · answered by Gone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just give it time. If you admit you made a mistake, she agrees you made a mistake then you have to let time heal the wounds. You are obviously concerned, so that is a good sign and a step in the right direction. Just don't get mad at her for caring about you and getting upset by your mistake.
2007-04-20 15:03:16 · answer #5 · answered by BumbleToe 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I used to not get along with my Mom when I was growing up. We didn't have much in common, but I was Daddy's little girl. When I got older my mother and I started to have a few things in common and definitely got closer. I was thankful for that because she passed away in 2002. Remember, nothing has to be said - just give your Mom a great big hug and kiss and tell her you love her. God Bless.
2007-04-20 15:02:42 · answer #6 · answered by j b 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think women go through cycles with their mothers. I don't think you can truly understand her until you are in your 30's or have a family of your own. I am married with a 10 month old (I'm 26) and I am just starting to appreciate my mom...now, she's still a total and complete nut job, but I appreciate her...a little....
2007-04-20 15:29:49 · answer #7 · answered by Level Headed, I hope 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Acceptance is a wonderful thing and tell her this to.... accept me for who I am or leave me alone!! That is what need's to be said to you both! Why do mothers need to make you feel bad when you already know what happened and your the one that has to pay the prices now, why can't they just advise and let us make our own lives?
Best of luck
2007-04-20 15:30:57 · answer #8 · answered by ohdarnitsmeagain 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
all i can say is walk up to her give her a big hug and maybe a kiss on the cheek and tell her you still love her and you want to talk to her without yelling and no one around that you know...maybe take her out to lunch somewhere where she cant really make a scene and just talk about it and tell her how you really feel... thats what i do when me and my dad fight and it works everytime...and all i can say is goodluck and i hope you and your mom work things out
2007-04-20 15:05:45 · answer #9 · answered by dirt_bike_chika 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
tell her you want to feel like you get along with her better and ask her what she needs from you to make that happen. you need a good heart to heart conversation.
2007-04-20 15:02:10 · answer #10 · answered by Bored Enough To Be Here 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋