I need help?

Question

Im such a failure. I can stop crying over my boyfriend because Im always worried about him and Im scared to lose him. I have no more friends because they slowly disappeared and i have no one to talk to when im upset, and my bf makes it worse by putting me down. I cant talk to my parents because they look down on me and i feel worse. I just got out of a mental hospital and i am on effexor and welbutrin but i dont know if its working. Im failing in college and i just dont have the srength to get out of bed and do anything. I live with my parents and there in debt and I have no money to pay for my car and I have 1000 dollars for tickets and fines. I also lost my new job today and i dont even know why. I worked my butt off and my boss told me I was doing well and now im just in shock. I try praying but i feel like God doesnt hear me. Im only getting worse and im having heart pains and no sleep and i cant stop crying. I want to be happy. Im only 18. counslers dont work. what should i do

Thanks everybody who replied. Im glad to see that some people are nice enough to help out strangers and I feel a little better thanks to you all. Im gonna try to hang in there!

Answer 1

That is a lot to be going through at such a young age. I'm sorry to hear that counseling does not seem to help. I was much older going through a divorce when I go counseling and I found that when the counseling didn't seem to work any more it was time for me to take my own life and get it into gear.

Sometimes you have to be a loner to get your head straight. You have to decide if that crappy job was worth it. Is that boy friend being too manipulative, do you need that kind of "friend" anyway?

Sometimes you have to take it one day at a time and just keep hanging on. Many best wishes to you in getting through these tough times. My heart is with you, hun.

Answer 2

If you are in college, you obviously are intelligent.

The first thing you need to do is begin setting an alarm clock, taking a shower and getting dressed every day,.

Second, why don't you try volunteering? You could begin by helping serve lunch at a women's shelter. I think if you see there are wonderful people helping make sure that other people's lives are improved, even with something as simple as a hot lunch, you will start to feel better about yourself.

Third, talk your doctors about the medication you are on. Many people find that Effexor and Wellbutrum cause the very symptoms, such as crying, that you write about.

Fourth, make an effort to smile. I find that the small act of walking down the street or an aisle in the supermarket and smiling at the person coming towards me makes a huge difference in their day. I would say 90% of the time people smile back and when I say "Have a good day" they thank me. It sounds so dorky, but I live alone and it makes me feel part of the world.

God hears you, we hear you. That said, God gave you a free will and ONLY YOU can decide if you want to continue having a PITY PARTY or get up and out.

I don't know how you ended up in a mental hospital, but in my opinion that is a place of last resort.

Know that my heart is bleeding for you. I will say prayers that you find the strength God has given you to get up and change your life. Only YOU can do it.

Blessings.

Answer 3

First of all, you're only 18 years old so you should not consider yourself a failure. I know people in their 40's who haven't achieved some of the things you have. You need to focus on the positive things in your life. 1. you have finished high school 2. you have a driver's licence (I didn't get one until I was 24) 3. You are capable of working. This depression, though rough will be history one day. These obstacles will make you stronger. Stay on your meds. Focus on you goals. Friends and boyfriends may come and go but you always have yourself. Be your own best friend. Eventually you will attract people in your life who will love you and be true friends who stand by you through thick and thin. So to the friends who left-- Good riddance. They were fakes. Good luck. I'm sure things will look up sooner than you expect.

Answer 4

Although you said you've had counseling, I'd have
to think that--because you also said you were in a
mental hospital--that you were "counseled" by a
psychiatrist. (That was not your fault. Mental hospitals
wouldn't be likely to have any other sort of "counselor.")
But it was definitely a step in the wrong direction.
Psychaitrists and psychologists are two very different
people. It's a very common misconception that they're
equal; but they definitely are not.
A psychaitrist's expertise is in medicines: that's why
you were put on Effexor and Welburtin. Effoxor is a
medication that is FDA approved for depression.
But one of Welburtin's most common side-effects is
that it will give you suicidal thoughts--and that is what
you want to avoid first and foremost.
(Take it from me: I battled depression for two years.
I was never on Welburtin. But my neurologist--who is
treating me for epilepsy--has always been strictly
opposed to it.)
Effexor is a depression-approved medication. But,
Welburtin and is not compatible with Effoxor.
Any and all presciption medications have one thing in
common: they either intercact with each other--and...
therefore, make a case for "two is better than one,"
or even "three's company"--or they will counteract
one another, making a case of "mixing oil with water.")
The very best things you can do for yourself right now?
First of all, find a neurologist. Let him know of the
two medications Dr. X, the psychaitrist, put you on.
I would wager 10 to 1 the neurologist would take you
off of Welburtin, and keep you on Effexor.
Next, while you are giving the Welburtin a chance to
get out of your system, find a psychologist to see on
a regular basis.
It may be true that your parents are looking down on
you now. But, on the other hand, it's possible that you
are misiterpretting them: they might just be feeling as
hopeless as you are--and therefore don't know what
they can tell you.
I'm sure life is very hard for you right now. But, it is
your responsibility to take some initiative. If you ask
your parents to help you find a PH.D., then maybe
they will. (You're their daughter. And they need you
just as much as you probably feel you need them. But
if you don't ask, you will never receive. And, if you take
the initiative to ask them, they'll probably be very proud
of you for doing so.)
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
But do not--I repeat DO NOT--find yourself another
psychaitrist. They're psychologists in wolves' clothing!
What you need is someone who'll not just hear what
you have to say; you need someone who will actually
LISTEN to you--and work with you. (I absolutely
cannot emphasize that strongly enough.) You need a
"virtual friend" and a specialist: a psychologist and a
neurologist.
Right now, you're in more need of them than you're in
need of food. Besides, they can both give you plenty
of food: "food for thought," that is!

Best of luck.

And, if you want an email friend--somone who's been
there and back--then you can email me anytime at:
[e-mail]

Answer 5

OK...from a guys point of view.
I can see that this bf of yours knows that he can do whatever he wants and you will not leave him. He has you in his grasp. He see's what staete you are in and he must be relishing in it.
my advice...leave him.
If you think you deserve better...then you must make better life decisions.
Secondly...your parents may be having more problems than you think. We do not know what they are, so we cannot judge them. I am certain they feel miserable for not being able to provide for you, so have a family meeting and get help from them to understand their situation.
About finding a job...at age 18 you can pretty much find any job (fast food service, pumping gas, etc). This is one thing you do not need to worry about finding.
I do not know how you could have racked up so much ticket fines, but you better learn to control this, or you may not even have a license to get a car.
Believe me ...God is watching you and protecting you.
Tomorrow morning...get up...take a nice long walk...smile towards everyone you pass by, even say "hello"...go home have a nice long shower...then go look for a reasonable job, near you home. This way you will not have to worry about driving your vehicle. No driving, no tickets.
Once you find a job and get paid...take your parents out for lunch or dinner. Let them see that you ar trying to improve your life...then maybe they will see that you are someone special too.
I really really really hope the best for you. Take care and God bless.

Answer 6

My gosh, you have more than your share of hard times. I feel for you. That said, you need to know that God does care about you. Maybe this series of events is designed so that you, or someone close to you, learns some important life lesson. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. You will be very strong indeed after this. Trust this, God will not abandon you. This is a temporary condition, and you will overcome these adversities. One of the best ways of feeling better yourself is to help others who need help. Try volunteering for some good cause. You'd be surprised what it can do for you. And being around others with positive attitudes will be a bonus. You can make new friends. I hope this helps. Good luck Kristine.

Answer 7

Listen to me, you sound like me and you can find the right counselor, call a crisis hotline, or maybe go back into the hospital. it is not your fault that you are sick and mental health is a sickness just like diabetes or cancer. I too have isolated my self, I ruined my marriage and now I am on disability so I don't work and I sit in my bed room on the computer or watch tv. I also have two kids. They know I am sick and they are dealing with it but we are working on straightening out meds etc. If the meds you are not on go to your local counselor and tell them, if you cant' do that go to the er. They have to see you there. Just don't give up and remember that there are people that can help you just don't give up.

Answer 8

Well first off it sounds like you're in an abusive relationship with your boyfriend. Tomorrow morning, get out of bed, get dressed, eat breakfast, study, go to class, and try to find a new job. reach out to old friends if they're there and let them know you want to reconnect. If that doesn't work, look around, I'm sure there are plenty of people who want to be your friend. I know it sounds hard, but you just gotta take it one step at a time. Find someone, a friend, anyone one, who you can talk to. Don't give up.
good luck

Answer 9

number one get off the drugs no 18yr old needs drugs, that is probably why you are so tired and can't get up ,that may be why you don't have your job, drop the bumb because he is just going to keep you down and use you,screw up you courage and look your self in the mirror say self you are a good person self you are an intelligent person so get off your butt and do it finish your education and find you a new job an think about old number one.

Answer 10

He is putting your down? You need to leave him, deal with your insecurties, and make new friends.
Worry about a relationship later!