How old can a child be who is living with there mother, legally decide to live with there father?

Question

I have a nine year old who wishes to live with me more than anything, but her mum wont let her. i thought rather than going to court, she could legally make her own decision at her age.

Answer 1

Children can never legally make a decision for themselves regarding which adults they choose to live with. Children don't always make the choice that's in their best interest, they more often make the choice that is more fun for them.

I believe that judges consider a child's wishes when deciding custody cases starting at about age 12 (that's what I hear most often), but in any custody case, I would guess that a petitioner or respondent can request that the judge hear the child's wishes (either directly or via a Guardian Ad Litem).

Answer 2

My step-daughter chose to live with her father and I when aged 7. This was in Australia and through our Federal Family Law Court. We were all required to see a Court Counsellor and give evidence before the Court. Custody was granted and she stayed with us until she was 14 when her mother married for the third time. The second husband was on the scene when she chose to live with us, I have my suspicions re this man and my step-daughter.
What the Court looks at is Why? the child wants to live with the other parent. If it is because they get lot's of presents, can do as they like etc., then this is not good enough. It has to be emotional and psychological reasoning eg I feel safer with Dad/Mum, Dad/Mum makes sure I have breakfast and lunch for school, etc.
Contact someone who could advise you of what to do in this situation as at the end of the day it is the child's best interests that should be looked after by both parents. Perhaps you could look at 'shared' living arrangements. This has become popular here in Aust. This is where the parents agree to having the child/ren live 50% at each parents house each week during the week and weekends. This allows both parents to look after the child during the week and weekends turn about. The child/ren remain in the same school etc., this has shown that the child/ren do not experience as much stress or self blame for the parents breaking up.
Good luck and if you have your daughters best interests at heart and she wants to live with you for the 'right' reasons, then do whatever you can to have it happen sooner rather than later.
Speak to her mother and put the question of 'shared' parenting to her. The mother may be concerned she will lose financially if your daughter lives with you. Look at all aspects of why the mother will not agree. And of course there could be some anger if you left her. 'You stole my world and happiness from me, you can't have my daughter too'.
The two constants in our life that can not be changed is who our parents are. And we have the right to know both of them when possible. Children are not pawns on a Chess Board they are of us and deserve respect as a person in their own right and their wishes need to be taken into account when they have a sound reasoning for their requests.
This is an argument I used for an incarcerated father when the State authorities were not going to allow his parents to have contact with his children. He won his case and 5 children were blissfully happy to see their grandparents.

Courts only change rules when the argument is valid and worthy. Nothing is more worthy than the happiness and well being of a child.
Good luck.

Answer 3

In Florida, a 13 year old can make that decision. I'm not sure where you live, but 9 years old sounds too young to make such a decision.

Unfortunately, you will have to resolve this matter in Family Court. It will be up to the judge to decide after both sides make their case.

Good luck!

Answer 4

a child can tell the courts which parent she/he would rather live with and it will weigh on a judges decision, but in the final say, the judge decides which parent is the best custodial parent.
Judges are human and are looking for the best emotional and financial provider with the most stable home environment and who is looking out for the best interest of the child. They dont really care if you buy her expensive things, spoil her rotten. They just want stablility and safety.

Answer 5

You sound like you are in the UK. In the US, it's 16, but you have to go to court then to get the child support changed or you will still be paying it. However, if you go to court sooner, most judges are willing to listen to a 9 year old, particularly if he is a boy and wants to live with his Dad.

Answer 6

Generally it is 13 and I believe that if it ever went to court they take in the wishes of the child and any other factors.

Answer 7

I depends on the state. Most states the age a child is given the right to choose is 14.

Answer 8

She has to be eighteen. The court would have to make her stay over at your house more. Trust me, I'm in the same situation. It kind of sucks that she has to be so old, but take it the court. That would probably be the best thing.

Answer 9

relies upon on the state you reside in. some as youthful as 11 some as previous as sixteen. you will possibly be able to desire to get a lawyer or pass to baby welfare and get this difficulty in the previous a decide. in case you will get witnesses, each and every of the extra useful. Be arranged on your son to be put in temporary foster care if the subject isn't solved astonishing away. attempt to comunicate on your son that foster care is merely temporary. (no longer all foster care companies are undesirable, maximum are reliable, loving human beings! you purely hear with regard to the undesirable ones.) reliable good fortune and this has to pass in the previous a decide for the baby to declare his needs. whether he's not sufficiently previous, he's adequately previous that the decide will take his needs into attention!

Answer 10

I think the age courts generally take the children's wishes into consideration is 14.