My daughter chose a 17 yr old boy over her! I'm so upset! How should I deal with this?

Question

When she was 12 I had her go live with her dad since I was moving out of state. The next yr she begged me to fight for custody back. I refused for 3 months. Then her dad exploded on her telling her that he would disown her if she told the judge she wanted to live with me. I suggested therapy. I drove 4 hrs ONE way to these therapy session (8 of them). By the end I agreed with my daughter, as well did the therapist, she was better off with me. Her father filed a petition to the court to take time away from me. I countersued for custody. This past Sept we all agreed that our daughter was to finish her middle school with him. Upon her 14th bday she would tell us which she wanted to live. If it was me, I had to file the petition to swap custody. March 22, her bday, she said ME so I filed the paperwork. Today in court her dad told us she changed her mind. She is now dating a 17yr old & would like one more yr there. The judge is bringing her in to talk to her alone. I'm appauld!

I cried to my daughter after the hearing telling her she was not going to live with the parent for only one yr but for her entire high school education. I also yelled at her for chosing this boy over us. She'd already told her 6yr old bro & 4 yr old sis she was coming to live with us. They cry so hard when she leaves. Now I am left to tell them she changed her mind. I have a strong bond with my daughter, I'm beside myself to think she won't be coming after all. If she tells the judge she wishes to stay, it's for the next 4 yrs. After all her dad & stepmom put her thru. Just last yr they disowned her for the entire summer she lived with me. But her dad says I verbally abused her by telling her today that she isnt going to just chose one yr..it's all 4 yrs. What? He had NOTHING to do with her last summer. He called 4 times to yell at us both. Threatened to sue US...What? He was a nut. And now b/c of a boy? She wants to give it one more yr? NO way! What am I to do about this now?

Our court order states that our daughter is to chose, not the judge, on her 14th bday. That was March 22...she chose me on that date. Now she changed her mind due to this new boyfriend of 5 days.

Answer 1

The Judge Is The One That Will Decide...Nothing You Can Do...

Answer 2

leaving a BEGGING child with her father, makes you a bad mother! she SHOULD be able to decide, because you and her father are unfit, and i cant understand where the judges head is! she found a 17 year old that claims to love her
when you're a gramma will you STILL deny your daughter when she begs
wow!