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My bf used 2 be really caring with me...he used to give me lots of kisses and hugs,he was starring at my eyes a lot,and nice stuff like that.But 3 weeks ago,he found out that he's dad has a cancer..and he will die soon....and since then he doesnt give me many kisses...he doesnt look at me like before...and he seems cold and distant. and i asked him if the spark is gone,ot that he doesnt love me anymore....cuz i told him that when a person is really sad about something like that with his dad,he should get closer to me and stuff like that.And what he said was that inside he feels the same things for me like before and that he loves me more than anything...but cuz of his dad's cancer he's really down,and cant express his love for me...but that inside he feels it,just that he cant express it.

do u guyz think that's true?..or is the love just gone away??

2007-04-18 09:58:40 · 15 answers · asked by Lollirot 1 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

15 answers

i think he is telling you the truth.. you lose a loved one and you become extremely depressed and down.. yeah he might lean on you more for comfort ..but nothing can replace his dad.. you just need to be there for him for support and give him some time to recover.. think about how you would act if any of your parents were on death road.. i mean im sure the guy still loves you.. he just has more things on his mind right now and its taking all his energy to sort through his thoughts.. give him some time and im sure he will recover and be as loving as before..
just be his comfort and support..

best wishes.
hope this helps..

2007-04-18 10:10:52 · answer #1 · answered by Alex 3 · 0 0

I do believe him. Losing someone as close as your father is a very hard thing to deal with. Even though he wants to show you all the love and compassion that he had previously, he may not have the energy to do so. He is probably going through a really depressing time and his body is preparing him for the loss of someone really special to him. Although you are also someone who he holds very close to his heart he probably also has the thought of this dying father on his mind constantly. I think that you should be supportive and be there for him because he will need someone to lean on in the coming moments. Although you would like the attention that he used to give you; now is YOUR chance to show him that your love for him has grown as well and you will be there for him when he is down.

2007-04-18 10:06:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

He just might be telling you the truth... but at this time in his life, you should just be there, and hold him, and let him know that you are there, and will not be leaving.. and that if he ever needs to talk or have a shoulder to cry on, lend him yours..I am sure you would be down and depressed, and unsure of the world if some one close to you had cancer, and don't have long to live... Give him the treatment in which you would like to have, if this happened to you

2007-04-18 10:08:24 · answer #3 · answered by tuffchevy86 4 · 0 0

He is going through a major life altering event. The last thing you need to do is bombard him with questions about you relationship. To you it seems that things have changed and they have but it's completely normal considering the family hardship he is dealing with. Let him greave. I know you want to be there for him but if he doesn't want you to then you need to respect that. Not all people get close to the one's they love during a hard time. Many people bottle up their emotions and become distant. The best thing for you to do is give him space and freedom to deal with this on his own. Don't add stress to him by talking about your relationship.

2007-04-18 10:56:36 · answer #4 · answered by teacher101 3 · 0 0

Well he needs time to cool down. He might have been close to his dad but since his dad is going to die I think he is taking this bad. So you have to give him some love then he might see that he is over his dad being dead. After that he might be romantic and he also might take care of you better than ever. I hope that helped you lots.

2007-04-18 10:08:22 · answer #5 · answered by dogs77008 1 · 0 0

Oh my God what the hell is your problem? You're really f****** selfish, he just found out his dad is going to DIE soon, and all you can think about is your fat self and whether he's kissing you enough? Do you have any idea what he's going through? You need to be there for him, not pester him about whether or not the spark is gone because he hasn't kissed you as much since he found out his DAD IS DYING. Grow up, you nasty b****.

2007-04-18 10:03:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3 0

Guys tend to be single minded.

I would give him the space he needs. He is very worried about his father and hard to get that off his mind.

He can't be worried about you right now..... just be patient and thoughtful. Make him lunch ask if anything you can do etc...

Do not demand affection right now, just be there for him.

In fact he may seem even more distant now as he may feel he needs to be alone to cry etc... or spend time with his family.

This is your chance to think of him not you.

2007-04-18 10:03:33 · answer #7 · answered by cathoratio 5 · 2 0

From experience I know that different people have different reactions to illnesses and dying. Give him time to work through his emotions and deal with his dad's condition. 3 weeks is not that long in the grand scheme of things.

2007-04-18 10:03:14 · answer #8 · answered by Sarah B 1 · 0 0

Its so true my dear. Can you a pie or cake when you have failed or when something very dear to you will be taken off away . Understand empathise with him. Even if he is gone you cant do anything but if he is not ur attitude will make him go off so Dont be so demanding .

Good Luck

2007-04-18 10:05:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous 2 · 0 0

no - but he is going through alot right now. I wouldn't expect him to act the same way that he would...his dad is dying...if your dad were dying, would you want to be all lovey dovey with your bf? I doubt you would. He needs to sort some stuff through in his head...give him a break....and be the supportive
friend he needs right now....

2007-04-18 10:08:59 · answer #10 · answered by kristina807 5 · 0 0

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