Why cant i Orgasm?

Question

i am 18 now and never had an orgasm what can i do to make this happen?

how old were you when you have you first one (female?)

thankyou x

by the way i am a vigin and never had a bf!
but i am hot! should i just find an older guy maybe!

Answer 1

You have more important things to worry about then orgasm's at 18...

Answer 2

Firstly, not all women can reach orgasm. There's a small percentage that just never get there (something like 3%, I think). Since you're 18 now, you should be getting regular checkups with a gynecologist. While you're there, talk to them about how you've never orgasmed, and ask them to see if there are any medical reasons for it (physical or hormonal or even side effects from medication that you might be on). Secondly, you need to figure out for yourself what feels good before you can expect to feel good with a partner. Invest in some toys, invest in a good book or two (don't just go with one - all women are different, and what works for people in one book might not work for you).

Lastly, RELAX. If you're freaking out about having an orgasm, you'll never have one. Being tense and nervous is the worst possible way to try and go into getting off. It just don't work. Which is why you should be trying by yourself and not with someone else. Don't rush, take your time. It's something that happens when you least expect it.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Ask your doctor. This is not an uncommon thing and many women don't experience orgasm through sexual intercourse alone.

First, I suggest you wait until you're married. If you're like most people, you will masturbate before marriage. You can buy a vibrator; try something that stimulates the clitoris and is inserted vaginally.

You can order these online and it is completely private. Make sure you order from a company that won't put you on a mailing list or sell your information. Check their privacy policy. I have ordered from spicygear.com and the orders come in plain, discreet packaging and the return address will say SG not spicy gear. They are a company owned by women so you won't be sent advertisements of porn or anything like that. I have also ordered from drugstore.com. They have a good selection and since they are a drugstore, you won't have to be concerned about the packaging or privacy. They don't accept returns from their sexual well being store, but who blames them?

Lastly, never set a time limit to reach orgasm. Wait for a time when you can relax and devote plenty of time. From personal experience, it has taken anywhere from 3 to 30 minutes. It is different for everyone and depends on your level of relaxation and your mood.

Answer 4

If u have a partner, perhaps he isn't doing it right. U could buy urself a dildo or a 'rabbit' www.annsummers.com has plenty of sex toys, pleausre gels, and things to get u stimulated. Obviously, thats all i can advise since im a male. But if the sex does feel good and everything and u really like it and u still can't orgasm, try the toys because u know how u like to be pleasured best! if this doesn't work, there could be a fault and i would see ur GP, but that would be quite rare. Go for the toys to be absolutely sure!
best of luck
x

Answer 5

First- get a partner that you can be relaxed with, Second- if you find something is feeling especially good ask him to keep on doing that the same way. Third- keep relaxed. It might take a little while. And if your just wanting to experience the orgasm try stimulating your clitoris, get a vibrator, and find your g-spot(usually it is about two inches in and up). I was with a partner at one time that had the exact same problem at that time she was 23yrs old, it took about 40Min's-1hr. of continuous stimulation before she achieved her first orgasm. Hope this helps. Remember be safe use a condom.

Answer 6

I would suggest that you find an older guy who likes you and wants to please you. I have been reading some of the responses, and I would like to say this. Be careful with vibrators and such, you can become insensative in that area by using such. If you are a virgin, then you don't know if you are one who is stimulated by deep penetration to orgasm do you. Gosh, if you have never experienced oral sex, then you don't know a lot of things, sorry, I am not putting you down sweetie, it is just that there is a lot to learn. Some women don't learn much untill they are fourty years old, maybe because they are too uptight and have not had much experience. Anyway, good luck, and be sweet and, live to have sex!!! HA

Answer 7

Ive been out with women that can and those that cant and those that multiple. the brain is the biggest sex organ in the body you need to be relaxed, feeling confident (this is hard for a lot of girls) and feeling sexy try self exploration and fantasies. Experiment its what ever works for you and above all enjoy =- O's are the icing on the cake but the journey tofinding them can be just like cake fun even without icing. good luck......just enjoy and you will suddenly find yourself having one and never looking back

ps Im a boy and it was13 but scared the sh!T OUTA MYSELF SO W3AS 14 B4 MY NEXT ONE

Answer 8

You're thinking too much about it, the anxiety will make it harder to achieve.

Sweetie you're still young, shut yourself away and discover what works for you. Forget sex, lots of women can't orgasm through intercourse and most men don't mind a woman giving herself a helping hand so to speak.

Just relax, think about things that turn you on and play around a little. When you know what works for you it will get easier.

Answer 9

The main thing is to stop trying too hard. This only causes psychological pressure that reduces the likelihood it will happen.

Orgasm is a natural occurrence that will happen when you are relaxed and open to erotic stimulation in an unselfconscious way.

Whether with assistance or auto-erotically (by yourself) your orgasmic response will improve when you become totally at-one with your body, when you cast aside any feeling of inhibition and self-consciousness.

For now concentrate on relaxation, on stimulating yourself manually or mechanically (although personally I suspect over use of electronic stimulators is not advisable, some judicious and gentle use may be helpful) until you have learned what type of stimulus your body particularly reacts to.

Orgasm is an experience that is totally natural and instinctive -- and one problem we face these days is to too much clever talk in the media, magazines, TV and the like -- it is really best to ignore that rubbish and just to relax and let nature take its course.

You will obviously fare better when with a partner who will take their time, and gently explore what stimuli are most exciting for you -- no matter how long the process takes! They will need to allow you to be quite selfish and they need to focus on you and sacrifice their own satisfaction for a while. This can prove massively positive for the relationship overall -- but often male partners can find this very difficult and demanding.

Often oral stimulation is particularly successful for many women as this can be a very soft, moist and gentle method for achieving maximum effect.

But everyone is an individual and you should not feel awkward or difficult about the fact that you are still awaiting this delicious experience. Simply relax and let nature take its course and gradually try to reduce any feelings of inhibition and embarrassment you have, when exploring yourself or when with someone else. This will all help you to reach that natural crescendo.

Answer 10

A real lover will take his time and teach you things....You are still young and you will have plenty of time for orgasms.

I didn't have my first "real" one until I was 21 and was dating the man I eventually married.

The best way (if you're dying to have one RIGHT NOW) is to pleasure yourself. At your age, it may sound gross, but trust me, plenty of women do it (because sometimes a man just can't seem to do it right)...once you learn how to orgasm on your own, it will be much better when you are with a partner!

Good luck!

Answer 11

Well some women have a smaller clitoris which makes it extremely hard to climax. You can try other things with your partner, different positions, find ways that stimulate your clitoris.

You can also be too stressed and not concentrating on the situation on hand (making love).

Age has nothing to do with having an orgasm there are just many things that can contribute. You really should talk to your Dr. about this they are there to help and beleive me they really can!!