They have been seeing each other since Christmas 06 & things moved fast..he went back to his wife once already but has decided to proceed with the divorce. He stayed at our house for awhile & now his parents (mind you, he is almost 50 yo) are strict catholics & do not feel its right he stays at our house. So he is staying with his sister now. I just don't want him coming back & forth & playing with my moms emotions. On the positive side, they have both helped each other through issues, been great friends to each other & also take bible study classes together. My mom is aware he has baggage is that there is a possibility that this may not work out. But you can't help your feelings!
2007-04-18 08:57:51 · 8 answers · asked by raisin4362001 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I SAW NO QUESTION THERE......THAT IS A STATEMENT.........YOU SHOULD GET SOME FREINDS TO TALK TO........
2007-04-18 09:06:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that your mother should tone it down UNTIL his divorce is finalized, and make that a Condition of their relationship.
It does NO GOOD at all to start a relationship PRIOR to the end of the previous one -- and the baggage there is much more than just having an ex and/or kids -- it is juggling TWO (or more) lovers at the same time .. and quite the emotional drain (or harm .. because ... one or the other or both are going to be seriously hurting after all this).
Plus, there is also the possibility of your Mother being dragged into court at this time, and her own life and reputation could end up being dragged through some really awful accusations during the divorce process. Does she really want to put herself through that?
Given that he has gone back and forth .. you need to support your mother no matter what her choices .. but ... put some words of caution in her ears .. tell her you love her and trust her .. but to be VERY CAREFUL about this relationship and to ASK for him to RESPECT her enough to NOT go any further than friendship UNTIL his divorce is final.
2007-04-18 17:14:18 · answer #2 · answered by sglmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that your mom should proceed with caution until the divorce is finalized. These situations can be tricky, and even if he has good intentions, which it seems like he does, he still may have conflicting feelings on the inside. Divorce is hardly an easy thing to deal with, hardly an easy choice. Good luck to you mom, I hope it works out.
2007-04-18 16:03:47 · answer #3 · answered by frenchiemac 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No marriage or relationship comes with a guarantee, but if the positives outweigh the negatives they have a good chance. Actually it is probably a good thing that he left his wife, went back and left again. He was probably just trying to see if it was worth trying to save his marriage before giving it up for lost totally (very valiant for a man). Good luck and God Bless.
2007-04-18 16:02:37 · answer #4 · answered by tersey562 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the best thing you can do is let your mom handle it herself. You say they have been friends for a long time. She knows about his issues, and he about hers. I know you are scared she'll get hurt again, but dating other people is a part of her own healing process and getting back to normal life.
Good luck to you and your mom
2007-04-18 16:05:39 · answer #5 · answered by izzy9954 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know you want to protect your mom. But there really isn't anything you can do to accomplish that.
Everyone has to go through their own process of living loving or grieving. Be there for your mom IF she was to need it. Be happy for her if she is happy. Be understanding to her needs.
As long as this man is being good to your mom and shows that he does love her, that is what counts.
Good Luck
2007-04-18 16:04:14 · answer #6 · answered by ♥♥The Queen Has Spoken♥♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mom is kind of skanky if she's dating a married man. I hope you don't follow in her footsteps. Bible study- lovely.
You CAN help your feelings if you don't date married men.
2007-04-18 16:04:46 · answer #7 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well dunno why he is divorcing if he is divorcing just for ur mom then i say she shud leave him why bcuz next day he will divorce for some other lady it all depends on intensions ok
take care
2007-04-18 16:05:13 · answer #8 · answered by saad ahmed 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋