I met a great guy last year but I sabotaged the relationship because I was afraid of getting close to him. We broke up for about a month b/c we couldn't repair the damage. We fought too much and needed some time apart. He wants me back and I want to be w/ him w/ my newfound confidence. The problem? He wants to take things very slowly and be friends trying to work our way back to a relationship. I believe actions speak louder than words and he doesn't act like he wants to be w/ me. I cuddle up next to him. I grab his hand. I tell him how much I care about him and want this to work. I'm definitely showing him that I want to be w/ him. I want all or nothing w/ him. I can't be just "friends w/ benefits", there is too much of a history between us. He has all the control right now, I have nothing. I shouldn't want to be w/ somebody who won't fight for us right? Do I wait for him to be ok with an "us" or move on? He won't take well to pressure. I do love him but am I being stupid?
2007-04-18 06:59:51 · 4 answers · asked by Marie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Why stay in this? Because I care about him and I want things to be great again. According to him he wants the same thing but just needs time w/ no pressure. I'm just supposed to wait. Anybody know of a better way to say to him, "pee or get off the pot".
2007-04-18 08:15:48 · update #1
He sounds like he wants to take it slow because he needs to trust you not to sabatoge the relationship again and get hurt. This has nothing to do with control, just take things slow and have fun. Now being friends with benefits, I'd tell him that you are taking things slow, so if he wants you he will wait on the benefits
2007-04-18 07:07:23 · answer #1 · answered by Girly1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree, actions definately speak louder than words. I dated a guy who was a complusive liar, after a while his words didnt match with the actions. I was very unhappy and knew that he would never change. I dumped and now found a MUCH better guy.
I think you need to tell him the truth and just move on.
Just answer me something. why stay in this unhappy relationship?
2007-04-18 14:08:49 · answer #2 · answered by TroubleRose 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice is to move on. I had almost the same experience, this guy was my b/f and all of a sudden he said it was getting too serious and wanted to change it from b/f & g/f to just friends. I told him I couldn't do this we were comited to each other but really not serious. So, it ended there, the next thing I found out was that he was involved with another girl, they ended up getting married.
So, that told me the reason why he wanted to slow it down is b/c he was messing with someone else.
Bottom Line.........Move On!!!!!!!!!!
2007-04-18 14:12:00 · answer #3 · answered by ♥RaCheL♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't be anything until you are first and foremost friends first.
2007-04-18 14:05:38 · answer #4 · answered by whymewhynow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋