I was reading an online article on playing mind games and I found out that I too am to blame. I really don't want to be the type to play this ridiculous game. I guess it grew from when I would ask my friends for advice and they would tell me to do as follows:
1. Wait a few days before you call so you won't seem desperate.
2. If he makes you mad then give the silent treatment.
3. If he talks to his ex then don't let him know you feel upset.
4. etc. etc.
I feel really bad because I feel I lost somebody who I cared about from this and I don't want to loose somebody else. How do I rid myself from this childish game? Seriously!
2007-04-18 06:06:59 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You can rid it by just growing up, don't do it. The whole silent treatment thing is something that all guys really don't like, and I can tell you this, that if you give a guy the silent treatment, don't be surprised if you get it back. I don't think that a person should have much to do with an ex, because an ex is an ex for a very good reason.
2007-04-18 06:12:37 · answer #1 · answered by Light Bringer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Number one don't play the games don't ask Ur friends for advice if their are going to give you advice like that. You call if you want to you don't seem desperate you want to talk and get to know each other. If he makes you mad let him know talk out your problems don't give him the silent treatment that is very childish. If he talks to his ex it's no big deal maybe they are friends. you can have an ex Boyfriend or girlfriend and still be Friends with them it don't mean there is anything going on between the two of them. Don't lose some one you care about over childish games you need to talk out your problems make them well known. don't pressure each other into doing something you don't want to do. It just causes more problems. go out with friends have some fun and then have some time together. just to cuddle up with each other and watch a movie. Follow your heart it will lead you down the right path most of the time.
2007-04-18 06:20:50 · answer #2 · answered by angels192002 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are always to blame because you control what happens in your life. Your friends are just telling you what you want to hear, that is very normal female behavior. A boyfriend can only do or get away with what you let him, so how can it really be his fault?
Understand that when your friends give you advice it is usually not the best. The correct thing to do is often the hard choice to make. Be open and honest, don't hold back. Don't play games like the silent treatment or withholding sex. Typical girl games that drive men away. This doesn't mean you need to put up with bad behavior, just that you need to expect and demand respect. Keep in mind that you have to give those to get them.
2007-04-18 06:17:32 · answer #3 · answered by Just a friend. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah you have to get over the nonsense in order to have something worthwhile. And bottling up your feelings and playing games to get the upper hand only leads to missing out on something good. You're going to have to take time out to work on you and make a conscious decision to make some changes about the way that you do things. And stop listening to girlfriends. True enough they're your support system, but do any of them have meaningful relationships? Watch the company you keep, chin up, and be happy. And if you find a special someone or special something, cherish it. Be honest even if it's frustrating at times and know that once you get over the games that you'll end up finding what it is that makes you happy. Smile, it's going to be okay.
2007-04-18 06:14:32 · answer #4 · answered by let_it_be_known1981 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh goodness. Playing a game just once or twice can be fun.Then you should have said I'm sorry baby. Don't go out with a guy for some time. When ever you feel temted to play a "game" chew on some gum, and kiss him. Not too much though. Try to be a better person, and get some friends to help out. Belive me they are the best advisers you can have!
2007-04-18 06:14:24 · answer #5 · answered by Hunnie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its either in you or its not ...personally I am not the one for mind games and I dont play them. I think its ridiculous to FAKE it and thats what mind games are to me. Why pretend to not be upset when you are? Why not call WHEN you want to, even if its the first day? Why be silent when you want to scream? I keep it real ALL the time and I would want my mate to as well.
2007-04-18 06:12:07 · answer #6 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can you forward me the link for that article on mind games?
Besides that, just do what you feel like you want to do if you don't want to play games. Eventually you'll meet a guy that appreciates your honesty and likes the way you are... period.
2007-04-18 06:19:06 · answer #7 · answered by Peter N 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to connect with someone, stop going to your friends on advice on how you should date. Do what you want to, what comes naturally. If you're following others' advice, what does that mean the potential date-guy is getting? Be honest and go with your feelings. Every dating relationship is different, there is no formula to follow.
2007-04-18 06:13:31 · answer #8 · answered by ew.wood 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be yourself, and say what you feel. If something is bothering you let the person know, at least then you can move on. Playing head games just drags out the problem.
2007-04-18 06:14:10 · answer #9 · answered by Cato 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you"re already on the right track....seems like you've had a break thru. All you can do is learn from your mistakes, take away the good stuff, and do better next time....it's called growing up :)
2007-04-18 06:14:05 · answer #10 · answered by tag 1229 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋