He has continual problems on the bus and has been suspended for other things, however this is new. He seems to be really going thru this hard stage but outwardly he is a good, positive, supre great lil guy! He is in Karate and I also contacted his Master about this too. Im Looking for some good positive advice and please keep in mind he is ADHD so little is retained when I punish him. HELP!!
2007-04-17 12:30:59 · 18 answers · asked by star 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
ok - update...he is going to write a letter to the other bus driver and I am going to see if he can clean that bus (he cleaned his own bus last week for being suspended). I cancelled his recess at school for the rest of the week. I am changing his med times and dose and limiting his sugar intake. Im speaking with Karate Master today about something there too...not sure yet. Everyone so far has had excellent help for me - a bazillion points to everyone from me!! Keep them coming, however, positivie input is supportive for a tired single mom with two ADHD kids... THANKS!!!
2007-04-18 01:30:27 · update #1
DEAR
SPANK HIM LITTLE BOTTOM REALLY GOOD THIS IS WHAT HE NEEDS OK
TAKE CARE
2007-04-17 15:31:17 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sounds like you are doing everything right!!! I have an
ADHD son as well and it is sooo frustrating when the "normal" discipline doesn't faze him in the least and yes it is extremely tiring... You are doing a good job, don't let anyone tell you other wise,,,. and it is very hard to find something that works,, one of the things that sort of helps LOL is taking away tv and also putting him to bed earlier than usual,,, he hates that !!! keep up with the meds,,, maybe he is not on the correct dosage or meds,,, as you know sometimes it can take FOREVER for the docs to figure out exactly what they need. I have been doing this since the end of the school year last year and just now getting into a routine of what i think is the right meds for him,,,, good luck and i do understand and know what you are going through,,, ps... don't let other ignorant people tell you you shouldn't be medicating him...... oh and mine is also in martial arts,, is great for his self esteem and gives him an outlet,, kudos to you for being wise to this yourself,,,,,
2007-04-21 12:19:57 · answer #2 · answered by tinkerbell3648 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1] Let the punishment fit the crime. Make him apologize to the busdriver,
and make him help clean his/her bus! [pick up trash,sweep, or clean windows.] Set this up with driver ahead of time and do it in your CHILD'S free time.This will reinforce the message,make the driver know you are aware of problem, and remind him of consequences.
2] Be age appropriate. If he were 16, I would make him clean the whole bus!
3] If first punishment doesn't work,make second one harder.
4] Rattle his chain! Take away a privilege [tv,computer ,video games]he really likes until he finishes with driver.
5] Don't take away karate! That sounds like one of the best things he has going! If he misbehaves there, let the Master give him a chore and apologize to class,etc
2007-04-17 13:55:02 · answer #3 · answered by Nurse Susan 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Honestly kids will be kids,and especially if he has A.D.H.D he is going to be a little more hyper then most and do things a little differently, my husband is 31 and has A.D.H.D, and its just something you get used to. But really he's six years old, healthy six year olds do that too, so I'd punish him just like you would anyother kid. He still knows what right and wrong, That is very good you have him in Karate I think that is the best thing for him, it gives him a way to vent all that built up energy also teaches him to focus, which is hard for anyone w/ that disorder to do. so I think you are doing a great job by having him envolved in something that helps relieve the symptoms of it. Good Luck w/ your little guy
2007-04-17 12:43:44 · answer #4 · answered by Robin M 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My son was diagnosed ADHD at an early age.
The impulse control issue was a BIG one (he's 18 now and once puberty hit things actually got much easier). I dont know about your guy, but mine would feel really bad and not understand why he did "those" things.
It did a number on his self esteem and he eventually started to get really defensive and would make up reasons for his behavior so that he wouldnt have to feel bad about himself one more time.
It's tough being in the parent seat during all this. I eventually learned to detach emotionally from his actions and not get mad about them. He was mad enough at himself (even when he couldnt admit it). I always sought a logical consequence to his action. Then it's done and you move on.
To your example given I would say a logical consequence is an apology to the recipients of his bird.
Good luck!!!
2007-04-17 12:44:13 · answer #5 · answered by Reneejah 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
One of the best solutions that I've experienced is for the child to write a personal apology note to each child (and bus driver) on the bus.
My nephew was bullied on the bus. After the bully's parents were notified, the parents required him to send my nephew a note. The child drastically cut down on his actions afterwards.
2007-04-18 00:43:05 · answer #6 · answered by kitkabob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I am in favor of the parent being in charge and such, but when a kid does a 'new' thing wrong, I am not in favor of punishing him. You have to set the standard before you expect certain behaviors. First you need to talk to your son about why this behavior is wrong, THEN if it happens again you can punish him in whatever way you deem appropriate.
Even if discipline seems not to work, keep at it, and it WILL work, given time and consistency. The people who decide that nothing works on their kid are the ones with the out of control kids.
2007-04-17 13:06:31 · answer #7 · answered by Cris O 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
My personal faveorite punishment for my 5 year old is military style. Like holding a stick out in front of him elbows should not be bent for 1 min at a time depending on the severity of what the child has done. or standing with his or her back against the wall in a squatting position. These punishments are a fav of mind because they do not involve spanking but still get the point across. only do them for minutes at a time with preschoolers. The older they get the longer the time should be. Since I have started don't this I don't have to yell as much and we have cut our tantrums in half. If the child is throwing a tantrum ignore until he or she stops. (do it too but louder if at home )
2007-04-17 12:44:13 · answer #8 · answered by blackberry34470 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
BEAT HIS ASSSSS!!!!!
well even if im not a mother
but i am a child well 14 but that doesnt mean anything
i think something like BIG punishment
uhh or u could get
around the problem like taking him to skool maybe get him
A COUNSELER
orrrrrr hes being like dared to do this stuf
does he have good friends cuz thats sometimes the prob.
well im just trying to help so theirs my little adivce!
2007-04-17 12:42:54 · answer #9 · answered by Mel Mel 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
cut off his finger! NO i am so kidding, but i think you should just sit down and talk with him about how that is not very good behavior and if he does it again you will take something away for a while that he is really into. Keep reinforcing that good behavior (so he remembers) it will stick eventually, But i do believe children go through these tough stages and no matter what you do they will go through them. keep him in karate if he likes it, i think it is awesome to have kids involved in extracurricular activities it keeps them busy and out of trouble...well for the most part : - )
2007-04-17 12:39:32 · answer #10 · answered by vickie2391 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
spanking another about 5 spankings should work and no tv for1 yr make him apoilgze to the bus driver no fun for 5mths and at the end of the yr 10 more spankings are coming make him clean your whole house and cater to you for 2 mths make him do city work and work for 48 hrs of time then he won't say a thing
2007-04-18 01:47:25 · answer #11 · answered by ajz adivice corner 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋