It is his only family, his mom died when he was very young and he hasn't spoke with is dad really in over 10 years. His uncle raised him and is the only family he has. We live together and are very much in love, his uncle lives next door. I am stuck because I don't want to come between them please suggest something I really just want to get past all this, I just don't understand what he was thinking.
2007-04-12 18:39:01 · 19 answers · asked by Kristen 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If he is doing this to you... there is a high chance that someone else is getting hurt. I would sit down with your boyfriend and talk to him about it. Be honest because the truth always and will come out sooner or later. Get it off your chest and understand that as much as you love your boyfriend it isn't fair to you... to have this happen to you, hold it all in, and then feel guilty to do something about it?
I feel the police should know. I am not in your situation so I know it must be very hard for you. Are you close to your parents to where you could speak to them about this? What about a counselor? Someone needs to be involved so that this does not happen again. Knowing that he got away with this only pushes him to do it again. Think of your own happiness, dont let him take that away. He is not worth it.
I think it you are truly not able to report this (knowing he could possibly hurt someone else) and cannot talk to your boyfriend about it... I would move out. Dont put yourself in a uncomfortable, scary, unhappy situation. Think of your boyfriend as well, he will find out if this happens over and over by who...the police? Wouldnt it be better if you spoke to him from your heart, him knowing you were there for him? Instead of a stranger. Good Luck to you! Whatever does notkill you WILL ALWAYS make you stronger! Pray to God to take care of you and put all your troubles in his hands, he is always on your side.
2007-04-13 05:54:34 · answer #1 · answered by imissrascal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not the one coming between the uncle and boyfriend. The uncle is. There is no way to understand what he was thinking. You carry no guilt or blame in this. you can either try to get over it on your own w/o the b/f know (not adviseable) and stay way from the uncle (which may be hard) or tell the b/f about it and see how you (as a couple) want to handle it. I am sorry that it happened to you. You are the one who needs comfort and protection....getting out of the livin situation (so close to the uncle) is a good idea...just remember you deserve love and respect...and if the b/f doesn't believe you etc then you may need to rethink the relationship. either wan find a way to stay way from the uncle (protect yourself!)
2007-04-12 18:48:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is a very tricky situation indeed, if you tell your bf he might lose the only family he has got or he might not believe you and you could lose him. I suggest talking to his uncle and tell him that if he ever touches you again you will tell your bf and next time you will have proof. I suggest staying away from his uncle or avoid being alone with him, you need to let him know that this is not ok and i can see why you are totally confused, i'm kind of confused on how to give you advice. If you can maybe talk your bf into moving further away from his uncle, let them still have contact but ultimately i feel like your bf really should know about this and i wish you had kind of gotten some sort of proof to prove to your bf that your being honest. Just try and stay away from him and i wish you luck trying to get over it but i'm not sure you will be able move on so easily.
2007-04-12 18:49:56 · answer #3 · answered by jimmy_chick78 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
SCREAM at the top of your lungs first and let out the anger. Then call your local Rape line. They will also tell you to get out of there and tell your boyfriend. I agree your boyfriend was probably also raped by this scum. You need to tell someone. I was molested as a child and keep it secret until I found out that my brother-in -law at the time also molested my niece for years. I have been scarred for life as have you. If I could have only been brave enough to tell she would have been spared. Please tell the police,boyfriend,your best friend anyone that is with in ear shot. You don't have to be willing to have been molested (just for the other responder that said you did). I have often wondered about doing him bodily harm that is how much it effected me and it has been over 35 years ago.
2007-04-12 19:31:02 · answer #4 · answered by mrscokelady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st of all--How old were you when this happened?
2nd of all---Have you told your boyfriend that this man did this to you? The man was NOT thinking of you that is for sure... he is a sick puppy and needs to be exposed just the way he made you feel exposed. Tell your boy friend... tell your parents... tell a counselor, tell a priest, Tell anyone who will listen to you and don't be afraid of the reaction because YOU did NOT do ANYTHING wrong..Tell a rape counselor. This guy could have a pattern of abuse and will keep doing things to either you or someone that he thinks he can intimidate. This can only escalate and it really needs to be brought out into the open... that is the ONLY way you will be able to put this behind you and move on... Another suggestion is to move out of the place your living in.. Move away!!! Move far, far away... and don't tell the ******* where you are going...
2007-04-12 20:04:24 · answer #5 · answered by jwatson7307 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend should know that his uncle is a rapist and you need to report this case to the authorities immediately, with your boyfriend at your side. I only hope you haven't waited too late for anyone to take your accusations seriously. Whatever happens, stay as far away from this guy as you can and your boyfriend should do the same.
2007-04-12 19:12:21 · answer #6 · answered by Bethany 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He wasn't thinking, that is the problem, and apparently neither are you. You said his uncle molested you, if you weren't willing, then, you were RAPED, and he needs to be punished for it, whether your boyfriend likes it or not. Your boyfriend has the right to know what has happened, if you don't tell him, then your relationship is based on a lie, and thats no way to try and start a life together.
2007-04-12 18:52:21 · answer #7 · answered by tennessee_cherokee 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should be honest with your b/f and tell him what happened. Tell him that he can visit his uncle but you will not go to his house and you don't want him to come to your house. The uncle is very lucky that you haven't pressed criminal charges against him. Never let yourself be alone with him again.
2007-04-12 18:56:09 · answer #8 · answered by p00756 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your boyfriend immediately. Then call the police. If your boyfriend refuses to back you up, then he's scum too. Maybe the creep molested him too. You never know. And you can stop Chester the molester from violating anyone else.
2007-04-12 18:51:54 · answer #9 · answered by markmccloud_1 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell your bf that his uncle molested you. Or just go to the police!
2007-04-12 18:43:25 · answer #10 · answered by ♥♥Pro♥♥ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋