Ok..I was raised a strict Catholic(I started to goof up when i turned 14). As a Catholic, I did some really bad things, like had sex before marriage, was pregnant when I got married......and so on. Here's the thing, I believe in Heaven, and I hope I am going there some day...GOD is ALL FORGIVIING right? So I did these things later in life(20-21), so when I was young what did I do so bad that made GOD punish me the way he did.....I was sexually, physically, and verbally abused by my father as little as 5(the earliest I can remember). No these are not repressed memories...they are real just like they happened yesterday. So...what did a 5 year old girl do SOOOO BAD that this had to happen to her. Not only that, but I also lost my mom when she was 46 to Cancer, then I was in an auto accident that left me disabled and unable to stand for any longer than 10min, or sit any longer than 30min, and I am no longer able to walk over 150ft at a time!? Am I just being a baby?? If so tell me...
2007-04-12 17:48:30 · 16 answers · asked by Momma P 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Sorry, I didn't mean to have you think that the things were related in any way except that they all happened to me. I am sure others have had many, many bad things in their lives too, I just wonder if it is something I did wrong, or if I didn't do something right? Do you understand?
2007-04-12 17:56:40 · update #1
One thing about Catholics is that you guys learn how to dish out the guilt onto yourselves. It's fairly impressive, but it's also sad.
I view life as a series of events that happen to you. Some will be good, and some will be bad. And most of the time, the events will not be related to each other. Sure, having premarital sex could have possibly led to an unwanted pregnancy--that is cause and effect. But, that act is not related to losing your mother to cancer. But, it can be easy to get sucked into the spiral of guilt.
Are you being a baby? Meh, everyone has complaints. I complain a lot, and I'd say that you have much greater grounds of complaint than I do. I suppose I'm being the baby when I complain. After all, my problems pale in comparison to yours.
It's easy for people to look at the bad things of life and seek solace in platitudes as, "It's all temporary," or "At least things will be better in Heaven." In the end, those platitudes don't help you get through the problem. That is up to you. While some good can come from complaining about it, that's only true when you tackle the healing process. It can be hard to take that first step--figuratively, of course, though I do hope for your sake that it'll be literally as well.
Life is full of hardships. I suggest that you take on your recovery as if God didn't exist. That's not to say you should stop believing, but don't rely on God as a crutch. Many people have done this, thinking that God would magically fix their problems, and ended up disappointed. If God is real, I'm sure he would be quite proud of you recovering on your own.
Most likely, you weren't being punished for anything...stuff simply happens. All you can do is endure it. That's true for everyone.
2007-04-12 17:50:53 · answer #1 · answered by Rev Kev 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you are far from "just being a baby." The fact that you have lived through all this to be here to tell about it is a testament to your strength. I'm an atheist, but I say if there is a heaven, you certainly deserve to go there.
Unfortunately abused children carry that "guilt" into adulthood, and being raised Catholic didn't do you any favors, either. You have convinced yourself you are bad and deserve punishment still. Please get some counseling, dear. I can tell by your writing that you are a good and sincere person and you deserve the very best that life can offer to you.
2007-04-12 17:58:49 · answer #2 · answered by Petrushka's Ghost 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have confessed your Sin to God.Right?Now agree with
what God says about This.He doesn"t hold confessed Sin
against You,---You have taken some Rough Hits,The other point you raised ,You are wondeing why this happened to you,Hey you are part of the Human race/If We all got what we deserve WE would be in Hell.One other thing don"t Harbor Hate in your Heart,It allows Satan a foothold.Life comes with
Wrinkels and Scratches.Yours is not a Stupid Question and I will Pray for You tonight.God isn"t punishing You,so Look up.
2007-04-12 18:11:47 · answer #3 · answered by section hand 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, relax. I understand very well about TBI (traumatic brain injury) and loosing a mother to cancer. (I had my TBI when I was almost seven and lost my mother to cancer in 1985.) Are you in any support groups, do you have anyone to help you, like an ILS (independent living skills) worker, or have you gotten any type of physical therapy? If you receive any benefits, you are entitled to all sorts of things. Many survivors of TBI have severe anxiety and sometimes survivors will relive things which happened to them. It's a b- i- t- ch, to say the least. It's called post traumatic stress disorder. Coping with this alone, is very frightening and lonely. I understand that you probably feel isolated when you relive these horrible memories. As for what you did in your early 20's, you mustn't be ashamed, nor be guilty. God isn't punishing you. It's so very important to remember that God is not punishing you. Okay...relax...find a TBI group/agency in your area. If there isn't one, contact by phone, or have someone else contact by phone, an office/agency which helps people with disabilities. Easter Seals is a good place to start. Much luck to you.
2007-04-12 18:23:16 · answer #4 · answered by Keselyű 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You didn't do anything to deserve the hardships you have experienced. When his disciples pointed to a handicapped man and asked Jesus whether he suffered because of his own sin, or the sin of his parents, Jesus answered "Neither." His explanation that the man's sufferings had to do with the glory of God seems obscure and hard to understand, but basically I think it just means that some things happen for reasons known only to God. That doesn't mean that God is punishing us when we suffer hardships on Earth. Jesus himself suffered pain and indignities that he had done nothing to deserve. I think that the core message of his own sufferings is this: God loves us and never abandons us, no matter what we may go through in life. I hope that you find peace in that message and can accept that God has a purpose and a plan for your life. That does not mean God wants you to suffer, but rather God wants you to experience victory over your sufferings...real joy and happiness in this lifetime.
2007-04-12 17:56:29 · answer #5 · answered by cherochap 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's not a stupid question at all. I'm truly sorry you had such a horrible childhood and so many difficulties to over come. We live in a world full of sin and sinners. Bad things happen to good people sometimes. You did nothing to deserve what happened to you as a child and God was not punishing you. Please believe that although God allows what seem to be terrible things to happen, it is because of the evil in this world and He is able and will turn these terrible experiences into a positive thing in your life.
2007-04-12 17:57:46 · answer #6 · answered by Mr. E 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Yes I do, it's like persons are combating for his or her religious existence and any individual asks what colour nail polish must I put on in these days. Sometimes you must reduce via the junk to get to the truly query so we will have a civilized dialog. Also you might suppose when you consider that the area is on faith persons might be extra respectful. I discovered how a lot persons quite hate faith it makes me suppose dangerous.
2016-09-05 11:55:47 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bad things happen to people for no reason.
You arent special in that regard - terrible things happen to people all the time.
You didnt deserve those things, lets not be foolish.
No one deserves those things.
Quit being guilty - and a victim.
God doesnt punish people "before" they sin.
I'm not even sure he does after....we might get what we deserve from people/places/situations...
But I'm pretty sure that if he can forgive murderers then most of us are alright in his eyes.
Give up trying to figure out the "why" - you have been mind f*cking yourself all these years trying to rationalize what cant be rationalized.
And as far as the rest, I dunno you well enough to say.
2007-04-12 17:57:25 · answer #8 · answered by freshbliss 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not a baby and what happened was not your fault. you have to tell yourself that and you have to believe it. I too was sexually molested from 8 to 12 years old. I lost both of my aunts that I would go to advice to cancer one was breast cancer the other was cervical cancer. I too had sex out of marriage and had a baby. I was 7 months pregnant when I married my husband. His grace was sufficient for me and it is sufficient for you too. All you have to do is ask Jesus to come in your heart and forgive your sins. Ask to be healed as well. Our God can heal you. It takes Faith.
2007-04-12 17:57:16 · answer #9 · answered by momof3 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't practice Catholicism any longer as I've resolved my disbelief in the supernatural to my own satisfaction but as I recall the faith has a depth of guilt trips to it . My take is to forgive and forget the guilt and concentrate on replacing it with positive thoughts and actions . One can't wallow in the depressing side of life if they are busy helping others and growing in the positive side of life. I used to be subject to sour grapes myself and although I still get depressed at my short comings they are balanced by self improvement and attempts to show kindness to others . Life is painful sometimes but pain does let us know that we are alive.
peace out and enjoy your life even if it kills you.
2007-04-12 18:24:50 · answer #10 · answered by dogpatch USA 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋