Does anyone know any good blond jokes!?!?

Answer 1

A blonde's car gets a flat tire on the Interstate one day. So she eases
> it over onto the shoulder of the road. She carefully steps out of the
> car and opens the trunk. Takes out two cardboard men, unfolds them and
> stands them at the rear of the vehicle facing oncoming traffic. The
> lifelike cardboard men are in trench coats exposing their nude bodies to
> approaching drivers...
>
> Not surprisingly, the traffic became snarled and backed up. It wasn't
> very long before a police car arrives. The Officer, clearly enraged,
> approaches the blonde of the disabled vehicle yelling, "What is going on
> here?"
>
> My car broke down, Officer" says the woman, calmly.
>
> "Well, what the hell are these obscene cardboard pictures doing here by
> the road?!" asks the Officer...
>
> "Oh, those are my emergency flashers!" she replied.

Answer 2

A blond and a brunette jump off a cliff. Guess which one hits the ground first?
The brunette. The blond had to stop for directions.
Q: Why is it harder to make a blonde snowman then a regular snowman?
A: Because you have to hollow out the blonde one's head!
Q:WHAT DO U CALL A DEAD BLONDE IN THE CLOSET
A:last years hide and seek winner
How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
Seven... One to make the dough and six to peel the M&M's.
Why can't blondes make Kool Aid?
Because they can't figure out how to get eight cups of water into that tiny little package
Q: What do you call a blonde with a brain?
A: Pregnant
Additional Details

5 days ago
One day a blonde woman was down on her luck and she needed a quick way to get money
She saw some kids playing and thought "Hey!
Maybe I can kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom!" So she creeps up and snatches one. So she began to write a note: "I have
kidnaped your son and I will give him back
if you put 10,000$ on the north side of the
tree in the park Signed Blonde."She sticks the note on the kid and sends him home. The next day she goes to the north side of the tree and in a paper bag was $10, 000 But there was a note inside saying: "How
could you do this to a fellow blonde!?!"
Q: what would a blonde do with a brain if she had one?
A: save it for later!

5 days ago
Two bowling teams, one of all blondes and one of all brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City.The brunette team rides in the bottom of the bus. The blonde team rides on the top level. The brunette team down below is having a great time, when one of them realizes she doesn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs.She decides to go up and investigate. When the Brunette reaches the top, she finds all the Blondes frozen in fear, staring straight ahead. She says, 'What the heck's goin' on up here? We're havin' a grand time downstairs!'
One of the blondes looks up and says,
'Yeah, but you've got a driver!'

5 days ago
There were 3 people in a bar a russian, ameramerican anna blonde
the russian said, "we were first in space",
the american said "we were first on the moon",
the blonde said "we will be the first on the sun",
both the russian and the ameramerican said "YOU IDIOT YOU CAN'T GO AN THE SUN
YOU WILL BURN UP",
the blonde said, "yes I know that why we will go at night."
p.s-i don't mean to be mean to blondes.nothing personal

sources: internet

Answer 3

Three blond cops go for an interview to make detectives.
the Sargent asks the first to look at a criminal's profile and tell him what she sees. the blond says "he has only one eye".
the sarge says " well of course he has only one eye you dummy, its a profile". And sends her out of the room. Then he shows the photo to the second blond, the second blond says the same thing. He sends her out of the room. The third blond looks at the photo and says "This man wears contacts'. The sarge pulls the criminals file and sure enough, he dose wear contacts. He asks the blond "now how in the world can you tell that. The blond says "DUH, that's easy. How's he going to keep a pair of glasses on if he only has one ear?"
Man walks up to a busy intersection and sees a blond standing on the other corner and yells "how do I get to the other side"? The blond yells back "Well duh, you ARE on the other side".
My wife dyed her hair blond once. She said she didn't fell any dumber. But maybe a little' lite' headed. (sorry about that).

Answer 4

A blond a brunette and a red head were on a road trip. All of a sudden the car breaks down. They all get out of the car to see what's going on with the car. After a few minutes, the redhead says, "We better start walking to the nearest town" The brunette says "We should each take something along for survival" the redhead pulls out some bottles of water. The blond asks why she is bringing that. The redhead replies " in case we get thirsty we have something to drink" The brunette goes to the car and pulls out the cooler of food. "Why do you bring that " asks the blond the brunette replies "in case we get hungry we have food to eat" The blond walks over to the car and takes off the car door. the brunette and the redhead look at her puzzled. "Why are you bringing that" they ask. The blond replies, "In case we get hot we can roll down the window"

Answer 5

1: There is a blonde in a boat in the middle of a corn field. Another blond pulls to the side of the road, gets out of her car and goes to the edge of the field. She yells to the blond in the boat " it's blonds like you who give us a bad name. If i could swim i'd come our there and get you!''


2: There is a blond driving down a road. She hears a cop behind her so she pulls to the side of the street. When the blond cop gets to the other blond's car she asks to see the driver's liscenes. The blond in the car asks which one that is. The cop replies "the one w/ your picture on it". So the driver pulls out her compact opens it and shows it to the cop. The cop looks at the compact and says " well if I had known you were a cop, I never would have pulled you over!"

Answer 6

I apologize in advance if I offend any blondes.
1) A blonde woman walks into a salon with her CD player and her headphones on. An employee tells her that she needs to take them off so that they can do her hair. She says, "But I'll die without it!" They assure her she won't die, so she agrees to take them off. After they finished her hair, they realized that she actually did die. They listened to what was on her CD, it said, ". . .Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. . ."

2) A woman died at a community pool. The police saw something in her hand. It was a Scratch 'N Sniff sticker that she found at the bottom of the pool.

Answer 7

Whats the difference between a blonde and a kitkat?

You only get 4 fingers in a kitkat

Answer 8

so there is this blond and she walks into a store and says can i buy that tv and the guy(who works there) says i don't sell things to blond so she dyes her hair brown and goes back in and asks if she could buy the tv and he says no i don't sell stuff to blonds then she dyed her hair red and asks if she could buy the tv and he says no i don't sell stuff to blond and she says how did you know i was a blond and he said because it is a micro wave not a tv

Answer 9

I liked that blonde joke fedup.

Answer 10

why did the blonde walk into the bank???

Duh, she didnt open the door...she walked right into the bank.