Me and my boyfriend moved in together last october and recently we started fighting about spending time together. It got so heated that i told him i was moving out with my mother and it was over. I did that thinking he would take the time to work it out and to get his attention. Well it backfired and he added that he wanted me to leave and he wanted time apart. I have been at my mothers house for two weeks and its not a good situation. Im the only one with a job there and no groceries, no cable, the house is real dirty, alot of drinking, pot smoking, etc. I never expected i would have to stay in a party house. So i asked my "ex" if i could move back. Is that a good idea? I dont want to risk losing him cause i love him but I dont know how to fix things if he wants alone time? Any advice anyone???
2007-04-12 13:07:18 · 3 answers · asked by tish 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
if you are going to get away from a worse situation then thats best for you --- to me when someone wants a "break" thats code for "i want to find someone better and if i dont we will get back together" ----- so dont push just live your life and treat him as a roommate only --- that will allow him time to come to his senses (we can but hope) and allows you to live a better life --- and if you find someone who cares more for you well best wishes
2007-04-12 13:17:22 · answer #1 · answered by trader1867 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Moving in with a guy to whom you're not married gives him the upper edge. You're at his mercy.
He can walk away from the relationship at any time when he has had his fill. No strings attached. No commitment.
So, you're at the losing end.
Is it a smart idea to ask him to let you move back in with him?
Definitely, no.
Learn to be independent and develop a sense of worth. The situation back at your home should not force you to lose your sense of worth.
You deserve to be treated well. You deserve to be listened to. If he's not doing that and simply wants you to leave, then he's not really committed to you.
Perhaps he has found someone else and wants you out of the way. So, he gives you less attention so you can get tired of the relationship and take your leave.
Alternatively, he may still have feelings for you but is unwilling to treat you the way a woman loved deserved to be treated.
Either way, you're at the losing end.
What should you do?
Do not resort to begging. It won't make things better.
Instead, learn to work, earn money, take care of your needs, and hook up with a man who treats you right.
Finally, it pays to move in with a guy who is married to you. Don't move in with a man who is not your husband. It blows away the potential for long-term commitment by your man.
Marriage still pays.
Read the article in the link below. It may help you see things from your man's perspective.
2007-04-15 16:36:32 · answer #2 · answered by blessing2010 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i think that everyone gets heated sometimes and you have to work around it. Hey I'm 13 and i get heated almost everyday! I think you should explain your sorry and maybe instead of fighting over the time not spent you cherish the time spent. If your really concerned then you could plan a special date or night but don't do anything extreme like a deserted island....well if you do bring food and water :) Good luck
2007-04-12 20:12:17 · answer #3 · answered by Natalie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋