OK, a clearer Q (adult topic, move along kiddies...)?

Question

From a philosophical sense, I know everyone fantacizes and maturbates. But, if you're in a serious relationship, doesn't maturbation tread very close to cheating? In my case, I know she does (and I do, too. I'm no saint), and it's fine in the sense that it's just fantasy, but because we are so open with each other, shouldn't we be content to wait until we can do those things with each other? I don't know if this is just a pride thing for me or if I am making a valid point. That is specifically what I am wondering. What do you think?

Answer 1

it is absolutely NOT cheating... or even close... as long as you are not acting on your fantasies and they are not always of other people... it's all good.

Answer 2

Sometimes, I think masturbation could edge on the side of cheating. I think it's where one's thoughts are that can really determine the issue but in that case you could really not know if your partner is cheating. If you and your partner are away from each other and thinking of each other, then this is possibly a way to relieve the physical and still be faithful to the other. If you are watching and fantasizing about others, then it's practically mental cheating. Masturbating while your other partner is in the other room or at the office and is going to be home soon, I think could be borderline cheating your spouse. However, I have seen people withhold intimacy from their partners and that is the same thing to me. It has a lot to do with the mentality and the individual situation, in which case keeping an open line of communication is very important.

Answer 3

I dont thinks it should be considered cheating, because its something you have to do you satisfied your urges. I would much rather my fiance to please her self than for another man when I am not around. Also these act could be saved for when your together but why do that when you can have the other person for you. The only problem in self please is the fantasy. If a fantasy becomes to desirable then it could end a relationship. But other than that I really see masturbation as a helpful tool.

Answer 4

It's not cheating. It's called self pleasure. Sometimes you can't wait for the other person, sometimes you just need the release.

You don't need to fantisize to masturbate. Most people do.... but fantasy is good. I'd rather my BF fantasize rather than actually go out and do it with someone else. Beside, the fantasy is usually with someone they could never ever have.

Answer 5

I don't agree that it's cheating. If anything, I think it's healthy for a relationship. It's a much better outlet than the alternative. No matter how much you love someone or are attracted to them, it's human nature to occasionally think about someone else. Especially when you have been in a long term relationship. My wife knows I masterbate occasionally. She's fine with it.

Answer 6

i don't think masturbating is cheating because you're not getting emotionally or physically involved with another person, which is what constitutes cheating to me. i might be a bit offended if my guy masturbated because it would make me feel inadequate, but it wouldn't be cheating. i know i am content to wait to do "those things" with him because it just means more when there's someone else involved.


p.s....if you want to keep kids out of this question, try being a little less condescending. what kid is going to stay away just because you say "move along kiddies?"

Answer 7

I think that masturbation is something we all like to do when we are alone. When a partner is injected into the scene, our fantasies and actions are limited by the presence of another. Why in the world would you be jealous of this??? No one is threatening you. Leave it alone. IF she catches you and raises hell, then you have a leg to stand on...but so far, seems that everything is working pretty much to schedule. Just because you are married does NOT mean you have to sacrifice parts of your life that are important to everyone. This kind of thinking, in itself, is childish, don't you think?

Answer 8

Like you said. its just fantasy. or even at that..people just need a quick release. no big deal ..I dont think in any way is it close to cheating...unless you are thinking of the neighbor.. because that fantasy could easily become reality....if it is a celebrity or something, the chances of that are slim to none.. And if you are thinking of your girl then there is no way even close that it is cheating...you cant cheat on her with her...until you are comfortable enuf to do the those things in your head together, then just have the fantasy...

Answer 9

I think you are nuts. In no way is fantasizing or masturbating a form of cheating. Both things are healthy releases in any persons relationship. To try to stop someone from doing that is just wrong.

You seem to have relationship control issues, now that is something you should control.

Pride is one of the seven deadly sins...

Answer 10

I tend to lean towards no. Its a known fact that guys that will tend to stare at an exposed cleverage, and think what if. I say let them think what if they need that. As far as masterbation goes it isnt cheating, its just like an advanced form of roleplaying, Dispite what they tell you on tv, its likely that after 20ish years you will get bored of the same *ahem*. Denying them of a little imagination will only have negitive effects on the relationship

Answer 11

I disagree, I don't think masturbation is cheating, its a totally different thing than sex because it involves a lot less work, and sometimes you're partner just doesn't hit the spot the way oneself can. Furthermore, its just so much more easily accessible. I personally don't mind at all if my boyfriend/partner were to masturbate.