Should i blow the whistle on my dad?

Question

I've just found out that he's having an affair. N i'm having real trouble controlling myself from having a showdown. My mom n my sis have no idea about it. Nor does my father know that i know. N i'm at my wit's end as to how to deal with it.. N my biploar is not helping me much either. I mean, it's just recently that i was diagnosed with bipolar n then within 2 days i stumble across this. I really can't understand what to do. I'l appreciate your help.

Answer 1

The best thing to do is to approach your father and let him decide if he wants to let your mom know about his affair. If he still cherish the family, he should stop his nonsense and you tell him that you will not utter a word. You just take care of yourself.

Answer 2

Someone had to diagnose your bipolar condition. This means you have had some meetings with professionals in the mental health profession. Is there maybe one you would feel comfortable talking to about this? Make an appointment and see if you can describe just how complicated this makes your life! I realize it's hard to tell anyone - and that's what a therapist is for. You can tell him or her. They can give you some insights, maybe question whether it is really true. If it is true, it is a heavy burden for a kid to bear. I wish you luck.

Answer 3

Yes tell your mom, she has the right to know. What if he gives her a desease? it would have been prevented if she din't sleep with him. my friend knows a woman who's cheating husband gave her aids, that's a death sentence. Your mother has the right to start making plans, right now she is at a dis-advantage. She gave birth to you, you owe her this much. What if the other woman got pregnant? this happens all the time. When your mother does find out she will be devestated to know everybody knew about this except her. I would view my family as traitors if it were me. Don't just tell your dad, of course he will say he will stop, but no kid of his is going to stop him from seeing a woman for sex. Go directly to your mom.

Answer 4

i think you should tell your mother because ever women would want ot know that husband is cheating on them. if you don't want to be respondsable for hurting your mom write a letter telling your mom that her husband is cheating on her .mail it to your house and she'll think the other women sent it but some way the truth has to come out or father will just get away with it and it's going to drive you crazy looking at your mother knowing she's being deceived.

Answer 5

Honestly, I would confront your dad before you confront anyone else. Let him know you know and that if he continues to see this woman you will go to the rest of your family with the news. He needs to s**** or get off the pot. There's no reaosn why he should have his cake and eat it too. We aren't in a perfect world, so I don't know how things will turn out if you confront him, but if you do and he doesn't stop; he'll know you know and respect you (probably) for confronting him. If he doesn't do that either, then at least you've done your part. Then I'd go to your family and tell them.

Answer 6

darlin, the first thing you need to do is take care of YOU!!!

i have bipolar disorder, too.... one of the big things we need to do is STOP letting OTHER PEOPLE control OUR emotions... don't take on your father's problems and worry yourself into a bundle of nerves and anxiety.

your father's problems do not belong to you.

your parents' issues do not belong to you either, although an affair will cause family upset.

focus on YOU.... that is so important.

hon, please listen and be honest about your feelings with your therapist... do the work they suggest to help you manage your illness. it will work if YOU work it!

i can't say what is proper or appropriate for you to do or say when it comes to your father... tell your therapist... maybe they can help? (you ARE in therapy i hope???? if not, please consider it seriously).

if you can't talk with the therapist about this, do you have a relative or adult family friend you trust and who you respect enough to talk with about the situation? You deserve some comfort and support right now...

sending hugz.

if you would like to join a mental health forum which is very supportive and offers care and concern, please email me. we are a small group. many of us are bipolar and many have family issues. the support really has helped me, personally.

Answer 7

If I were you, I would go to my father with what I just found out. I don't think it is your place to tell your mother; he must do that, and you must give him a deadline to do so. Tell him that you will go to her by next weekend with this information if he doesn't come clean.
Get yourself some help with this as well. You are going to need to talk to a professional.
Sorry about this bad news.

Answer 8

Tell your father that you know and give him a deadline to confess to your mother-if you need moral support,confide in a friend or other family member and confront him together

Answer 9

Ask your Dad to accompany you to your doc for your next check-up. Solicit his thoughts on how you can better handle you bipolars.

Then while waiting in the clinic, out of the blue, ask him why is he cheating on your Mom.

Just take if from there---

Answer 10

bipolar or not what your father is doing is wrong-you know it and so does he.i understand your confusion and i know you love your father and your mom but think what it will do to your mom if she finds out that you knew and never told her.Maybe you should tell your dad that you know and tell him he needs to stop or you will tell your mom.it's a hard decision i know but you can't let your mom be decieved and betrayed like that-she deserves to be happy and so do you.if you do tell your mom he will love you just the same anyways.
email me if you need to talk ok?
[e-mail] Donna