I never had sex before and I'm a virgin, the problem is that I'm getting married in June, and I'm kinda scared

Question

My soon to be wife is not a virgin, we saved sex for the honeymoon, and I told her I had sex before, what should I do?

Answer 1

First of all, big kudos to you for waiting. It is a rare thing these days for people to be a virgin when they are getting married.

As for your first time, and the communication with your wife...please talk to her about this BEFORE the wedding. She will probably be upset that you lied to her, and you two will need time to sort that out. You need to start out honest with your bride to be....you do not want to start off hiding a lie on the first night you two are together. This is obviously something you should talk about.

Sex begins in the brain, not in the bed. Anticipation, communication...those make sex good. If you hop into the bed and try to be a stud and act like you know it all instead of talking to her about what she likes, telling her what feels good to you, and learning together, it will not go nearly as well.

Also, once you guys get past the "Why didn't you tell me you were a virgin!?" conversation, she will most likely be honored that she will be your first and only woman. That is tremendous. Plus, knowing you will be having your first time, she will be more understanding of your nervousness, and I'm sure she will try to make it even more special.

Good luck hon. ~hug~

Answer 2

Wow, I kinda understand why you lied, but you should tell her the truth. There is nothing to be scared or nervous about, everyone that has had sex had have a first time right? If you are still scared, then talk to someone that you can trust for advice, but really you should tell her that you are a virgin, chances are she will like it!
It is great that you waited, you are a good guy.

Answer 3

Dude i do no longer see what the enormous deal is of you nonetheless being a virgin. im 18 gonna be 19 this month & i do no longer possibly care im in no hurry. in case you desire to discover a woman who needs a severe relationship do no longer circulate to bars, golf equipment or events. reason i assure you, you will no longer discover something severe there. in case you desire to get laid and do loopy issues then circulate to those places. once you're into international of warcraft detect a woman who likes that, or discover somebody who will such as you for who you're. do no longer exchange your self for somebody. till it exchange into like a great deal(Ex: like somebody, doing medications or some thing) then actually exchange that. Which im particular you do no longer do this. & approximately you feeling awkward having a gf and telling her you have in no way had intercourse. i be attentive to a great number of ladies who think of thats lovable! :) Like me:D so do no longer challenge approximately that! i be attentive to men are meant to be like with a great number of ladies and stuff yet you're particular considering the fact which you have no longer completed that yet. :) theres a time-honored time for each little thing! :) lol. stable success!!!!

Answer 4

Having sex for the first time after marriage was the norm in the US not so long ago. You should be proud of yourself, not embarrassed. Marriage should be about honesty ( and I don't mean in your face rude remarks, hehe) so imho you should tell her the truth that it's the first time for you and that you are glad that it will be with her on your honeymoon. You'll have fun learning, so don't be too uptight. On another subject, would you like her to be tested for HIV? She might only have had one (or not too many partners) but you can't be sure about the guy(s) she has been with.

Answer 5

Okay, my answer is to be honest with your soon to be wife. Have you ever seen 40yr old virgin?? Trust me, honesty is a big thing and I'm sure your wife will appreciate you being honest with her, especially about a sensitive situation. Plus if she knows you're a virgin, on your wedding night, she may take over and you wont have to worry about a thing!! :P Good luck, congratulations on getting married and for waiting.

Answer 6

Maybe you should start your marriage on the truth and not a lie. I'm sure it wouldn't make much of a difference since you guys are waiting until marriage, that means your relationship wasn't ever about sex. You should tell her, don't be a liar and lose her trust already, how a relationship starts is how it ends. If it start on a lie it ends on a lie.

Answer 7

You have got to fess up. She will expect more out of an experienced man than a non-experienced man.

No worries. My husband was a virgin and I wasn't. Things worked out eventually. But that first time was over before it began. Just be willing to learn, and show enthusiasm.

Answer 8

First off, you shouldnt have lied and told her you have had sex... for one, that gets you no points, and now all the points with her you would have gotten for telling her your a virgin is now going to go down the tubes for lieing to her. Wow, loose loose situation. Tell her now and then forever hold you pieces in your hands.

Answer 9

For pete's sake, tell her the truth! Do you really want to start your marriage on a lie? And have her wondering why you are so bad in bed?

Tell her you exaggerated your experience, and let her know you're nervous. She'll probably think it's sweet and look forward to showing you exactly what to do.

Answer 10

If you've told her you're very experienced, than you're an idiot.

If she's under the impression you've had sex, but not too much...I wouldn't worry about it. Just have sex with her, and for god sake have fun...It's supposed to be a fun thing, not a thing to get all scared about.