My friend is getting married 7/7/07 in Vegas and then redoing the whole thing in Jan.... long story short... she is going to have the whole traditional wedding... and wants a shower and everything. I wanted to do something nice to recognize her eloping.... but I didn't want to spend a lot of money since I'll be buying her gifts in the future... plus I have my own wedding to pay for. Anything other then a card that I can do or give her to recognize her first wedding day? I tried calling the chapel to buy them a drink or something but they want a freaken $100!! Or is a card ok?
2007-04-09 14:11:08 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Stick with the card.
2007-04-09 14:45:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah sorry I have to agree with the other posters. Your friend needs someone to inform her of the obvious. As much as it sounds great to have everyone giving gifts for months and months---you only have one wedding. Everyone is not suppose to dedicate a year to celebrate your wedding. If you chose to elope and exclude your friends and family from the wedding, that is fine--her choice. But don't expect the gifts to come rolling in. And throwing a "reenactment" of the wedding is just tacky. If I wasn't good enough to be invited to the real wedding, I don't want to come to a "show" wedding. Next she'll be saying that wedding was just "opening night" before they go on tour. She also will only have 1 anniversary as well--not a July and a January. Please, as her friend, tell her to get a clue.
You are clearly her good friend so I think you should get her something. Try something off her registry as I'm sure someone like this has 7 or 8. You don't need to spend $100 if you do not have it. A gift is a symbol of generousity, not a mandatory entrance fee. If all you can afford is a card, that is more than fine. If you wish to get her something for the shower as well as the wedding, that is nice as well but it is hardly required for you to go in debt for a friends wedding. You must be practical with your own financial situation and budget how much you can spend on your friend. Pick out a couple items off her registry or call the hotel they are staying at and see if you can buy a bottle of champagne from room service and have it delivered.
As they are getting married in Vegas, go for something goofy like the Just Married tshirts or can coozies. There is no such thing as too goofy or tacky in Vegas.
But don't try to recognize multiple showers, multiple weddings, and multiple birthdays. It's just a scam.
2007-04-09 14:38:50 · answer #2 · answered by phantom_of_valkyrie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Traditionally, the whole idea of "eloping" was for two people to fun off and get married on their own because their friends and family didn't approve of their marriage! Personally I think people in general are getting pretty selfish with weddings. If your friend wants to elope then wish her luck! But if she wants a traditional wedding, tell her to stay home! But to elope AND have a traditional wedding AND have a shower AND have a reception? Puh-leeeeeeez! I suppose next you're going to tell me that this isn't her first marriage, that she's almost 30, and that she's registered for thousands of dollars of stuff that she already has!
2007-04-09 14:19:46 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
A card is fine. Since she is doing a shower and wedding, you really do not need to do anything for the eloping part. If you do want to do something nice, do something nice for the honeymoon night. Maybe get something like bubble bath stuff or something the two of them may enjoy together.
You could even get them the just married flip flops, shirts, or hats. Better yet, give them $20.00 to gamble together as the 1st thing they do together as Mr & Mrs.
Just remember it is the thought that counts and the big bucks can be spent on the shower and wedding gift.
2007-04-09 14:23:43 · answer #4 · answered by Athena13 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
to be quite honest...from what you have told us, once your friend elopes she has no real right to throw herself a huge wedding expecting all the showers and gifts that go along with it so many months after wards. when you choose to Elope you give these amenities up in the choice.
A small reception and even a renewal of vows for family is appropriate but the bridal showers and the million dollar white wedding is inappropriate..... give her something really sentimental and special from yourself for her Elopement ( a cold bottle of white wine and some chocolate covered strawberries which you can dip yourself, waiting for them when they get back would be cool ), and concentrate on your own wedding Girl......I hope they are both wonderful forever marriages...d
2007-04-09 15:02:22 · answer #5 · answered by becca 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, there's really only going to be 1 wedding, and that will be in Vegas on July 7--and I sincerely hope she's already planned it and booked it, because I think half the weddings this year alone are going to be on July 7, and half of those are going to be in Vegas--it is NOT an original idea by any stretch of the imagination. On your recognizing her 7/7/07 wedding date, if you don't have the money to do anything for her now, you don't have the money, and that's that. Save your money for the "big" wedding, gifts and all for later this year.
2007-04-09 14:21:55 · answer #6 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If she wants to elope she wants to elope - thats all there is to it. Good luck to her... seriously. I don't see the issue to be frank. If it makes her happy - where is the big prob. But to answer your question a card with a nice and thoughtful message should be fine. If you think its not enough, write a poem or find a nice picture of them both and frame it. It doesn't have to be a big gift, so you can be creative with it.
2007-04-09 18:36:34 · answer #7 · answered by ~(Tinker) Belle~ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry but unless she has to elope because of personal reasons (ie, pregnant, insurance reasons, something of that nature) she only deserves one gift.
It's unfair to people to have two weddings...One because you want to get married and the other because you want the gifts. If she doesn't care enough to include people in her real wedding then she shouldn't be given gifts two times.....
2007-04-09 14:34:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A card is fine.
2007-04-09 15:02:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋