what to do about pre-marital sex continued?

Question

I asked the question a few minutes ago and got an overwhelming reply, thank you for your answers, but i have another related question. for those of you who said marriage> Christian or not I want to know that I'm getting married because it is the right time and for the right reasons, not because of SEX. Don't you think people should get married for more than just sex? I dont wanna look back on my wedding and think that we got married just so we could have sex guilt free

Answer 1

I think the point they are trying to make is that sex is just as serious as marriage and should take as much contemplation.

Answer 2

You know I'm an atheist, so my position has nothing to do with some abstract notion of offending some god. But I know first hand, as does anyone who has ever been sexually active, that once someone is your sex partner you will tend to overlook the neon warning signs about your relationship potential and you become attached to, physically addicted to the other person in a way that makes rational relationship decisions tougher and increases the chances that you will marry for other than compatibility and genuine devotion to your partner (and vice versa).

I think many religious principles are dismissed as baseless pietsm (because that is the basis for obedience that the religious cite). But in reality many religious taboos are grounded in long and hard social experience with how these things work out. I think the Biblical urging to abstinence and chastity has a practical psychological and biological basis. I think that chastity and abstinence don't guarantee a sucessful marriage, but I think pre-marital sex clearly increases the likelihood you will marry the wrong person. I have seen it happen again and again, whereas my acquantances who abstained before marriage have stay married, and in fact seem to have pretty satisfying sex lives and better than average friendships with each other.

I realize that evidence is purely anecdotal, but it's worth considering.

Answer 3

It is the primary reason "virgins" do get married, guilt free sex. You can have a "married" relationship with some one and never violate any of gods commandments. Just don't sleep together and have sex. Also, if you interview many people married for a long time you wil discover that they live that way. They have a marriage that would not violate any commandment of god.

Answer 4

This is from Abriel_o...

I think sex before marriage is not only acceptable, but essential. You can be completely compatible spiritually, mentally, emotionally, intellectually...but if you are not physically compatible, the relationship is not going to be a happy one. I think most people, due to the guilt and stigma attached to sexual impulses in Western culture, underestimate just how important sex is in a relationship, especially marriage. Sexual frustration is one of the top causes of divorce in the USA, and it's largely because the people who marry each other were not sexually compatible to begin with! If they had sex before the ring, they would have known that and it would have saved a lot of heartache, not to mention money.

I know people will disagree with this, largely for religious/spiritual reasons, but my stance is that one really shouldn't buy the cow without sampling the milk first.
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Wolfseye
Premartial Sex and living with someone for some time is better. You really know and understand that person even better than before, it gives you a taste what would life be like to live with that person. There is nothing wrong with premartial sex (now I'm saying sleep with every person you see, but choose your partners by dating and if you really want to know what that person is really like, move in and live with them).
There is nothing wrong with testing the waters, to make sure that you have a strong water tight foundation for marriage.

Source in a minute. Hope this helps, as long as you love the person nothing else matters. Good luck

Answer 5

You should get married because you want to spend your life with another person. Marriage isn't about sex (although a marriage without sex is no good either).

-My opinion, although you need to make decisions in life that are best for you. Your decisions = your responsibility. Input from others can be informative but you alone must live with the choices.

Answer 6

Yes, you should definitely get married for more than just guilt-free sex. There's a relationship/friendship factor that must be considered by each of you asking yourselves, "Can I live without this person? Can I love this person like they seem to love me?" If you can answer yes to these and other similar questions you may have, then you're more ready to get married than most!

Answer 7

The only thing that separates marriage from other relationships is SEX. And, the ultimate purpose of sex is re-creation. You don't need to have sex to have friendship, right?

Therefore, a man and a woman marry to take responsibility for each other and their new born children. Therefore, they have the moral right to enjoy sex with each other. Not otherwise!

Answer 8

Right, I totally agree- would that be your only reason? You said you guys plan on getting married. SO, I am assuming you have more reasons than sex, and your already active, so that must not be the reason why you guys have decided to marry. I guess it helps, if you can identify for yourself what those good reasons and right time-are. Good luck, and God bless you!

Answer 9

I saw your previous question, but it was so crowded I decided not to answer. You should definitely be getting married for more than sex, and you and your boyfriend should seek counseling at your church before you marry. The counselors will probably point out to you that you should marry someone who shares your faith (or be involved romantically for that matter) per 2 Cor 6:14. Sometimes God expects to choose between him and the things of the world, it's happened to me before. I believe the closer you come to him, the more likely he will ask to choose between him and your bf. If/when it comes to this point I hope you will choose God, he has way more to offer, and loves you more believe me.

Answer 10

That is very true. Marriage is a union between a man and his wife to help one another. When you get married you ultimate goal is to help one another become saints. Not for sex, Sex is to help you reproduce. Marriage does not need to be entered into lightly, whom ever told you to go get married does not understand the true meaning behind marriage. If you need to ask anymore questions go to my e-mail and send them to me and I will help. God bless you and Keep the faith.