My best friend & my husband worked together and were good friends. Then my husband left that office and they continued to talk daily sometimes mornings & evenings but I didnt know a thing about it nor did my friends husband. My friends husband saw her cell phone bill and thought something was going on and questioned her about it. After questioning both and going through all his stuff I realised that nothing was going on. They were just talking. Now I'm finding it so difficult to be friends with her. Before this she was my best friend and I truly enjoyed her friendship. The reason she gives for not telling me about her daily chats with my husband is that I am "overly possessive" of my husband.
We have many common friends and were very close before all this happened. Now if I stop talking to her it will be noticed. And although I hate what she did, it's very hard for me to let go of her friendship.
2007-04-09 06:40:16 · 12 answers · asked by Ginger 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Your best friend is missing two qualities: the quality of "best" and the quality of "friend."
The truth is that she was having an "emotional affair" with your husband. When a woman is emotionally unsatisfied, she finds other men to fill in the emotional blanks.
So when she wanted to be sexy and flirt, when she wanted to whisper and share secrets, when she wanted to make jokes and laugh, when she wanted to talk a little dirty, etc., she sneakily called YOUR man. And now she's got enough nerve to try and justify it to your face? She's got the audacity to insult you and call you "overly possessive"? Total disrespect.
But what SHE did, is actually secondary. Your husband has betrayed you. What kind of HUSBAND does this to his wife? Whether he knows it or not, he was also having an emotional affair.
2007-04-09 07:09:15 · answer #1 · answered by HyperBeauty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a hard situation to be in, if one of my best friends was working w/ my hubby and they were talking all the time I can see where its not a big deal, she's your best friend and he's your husband, obviously they are going to have things in common. And I'm glad all four of you realize that it didn't go any further, but I too would have a huge problem with her saying you are "overly possessive". I think I would of told her that well maybe not cause look what happened. Regardless this is a situation that socially you think you must handle, and I admire that, but she crossed a line being judgmental and sneaking behind your back and her husbands to have secret discussions daily with your husband, what does she expect for you to pretend you don't know what type of friend she truly is? Likewise for your husband. There isn't much you can do to salvage this relationship, if you feel you must, remember that you can be polite and you can be friendly, but you don't have to trust her with your thoughts and your feelings anymore, or your husband. Chances are your other friends will find out about this if they don't know already, you'll find out who your true friends are, its a horrible way to have to find that out, but that is what is happening, and I'm sorry but I think that includes everyone around you.
2007-04-09 06:59:50 · answer #2 · answered by Sun R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be afraid to say anything or stop talking to her. What she did was wrong and no matter how you are, who is she to judge what you should and shouldn't know about your husband. So I would tell him to slow down the conversations with her and tell him that it makes you feel uncomfortable and you don't like it. And if it was so innocent from beginning then why didn't anybody say anything to begin with. So that right there makes me think something suspecious. But don't jump the gun, just address both of them, separately and let them know that you told the other person. What should happen at the end of this is, your husband should respect your wishes and comfort you and if you bf continues this kind of activity, then she's def not your bf and of course not a friend at all.
If she wants somebody to freakin' talk to. Tell her talk to her own freakin' husband and leave yours alone.
2007-04-09 07:00:46 · answer #3 · answered by misscancer10 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would tell her how it hurt, and why couldnt she of included you in some of these convo's since she was your best friend and she says you are overly possessed of your husband that to me would make sure you are included , and your husband if that was a mutual friend then the same question would go for him what was it they couldnt of included you.... ya i could see talking on the side here and there but constantly no reason for not including you....
2007-04-09 06:52:06 · answer #4 · answered by Renee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand where you are coming from, but she had no right to call your husband twice a day without you knowing about it. What about him though?? He didn't tell you either. I would feel so betrayed.
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She's up to no good. With a friend like that, who needs an enemy?
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