Okay, my two soon to be sister in laws are driving me off my friggin head!! Is it me or are they bitches. The first one was complaining about reletives staying at her fathers home for our wedding this fall, and she said to me, why don't they stay at your f****** house, they are here to see you, (they are not staying at her house so why do she care), now the second sister is a bridesmaid in our wedding and she complains about everything from buying a dress to help with the shower. Their dresses were only $100.00 and she won't pay her portion of the cost of the shower, it would not bother me but she agreed to but when it came time to pay she refused. Also, I picked up her shoes for the wedding and her little girls flower girl dress and she won't pay me back. Oh they are driving me nuts. Do you think they are being hard to get along with or am I just a sap.
2007-04-09 01:13:20 · 15 answers · asked by Bride2Be 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Girl get ready...If I were you, I would start planning my life with as little interaction from them as possible. Please don't volunteer to be a baby sitter and when you have children, have alternate childcare options available for your family.
2007-04-09 01:18:03 · answer #1 · answered by Emerald Jones 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They are being quite difficult and how have you not managed to beat them into submission yet? Okay...that was a joke. I don't even konw how to begin to help you with this one as I really don't know what would make someone be this difficult and bitchy in the first place. I guess what you can do is ignore comments such as where guests are staying (was she off her rocker to suggest them staying at your house for your wedding??), the second sister agreed to be in the wedding she should have known it was going to come at a cost. And yes $100 is not much for a dress (10+ years ago when I wasn't making squat I had 2 weddings 3 weeks apart and the dresses alone totalled over $300). Who arranged your shower in the first place (it should not have been you), it should be up to that person to talk with your future SIL about getting her to pay her portion. With the flower girl dress, I guess you can keep reminding her that she owes you. Were they this difficult before the wedding plans started?
2007-04-09 09:01:51 · answer #2 · answered by Sunidaze 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow my sympathies to you! When I got married and even before hand my spouse and I made an agreement we would each handle our respective sides of the families. My husband knew how to handle and fight with his sister, and I knew how to handle my sister and brother. This way you are able to have a relationship with your future inlaws, as they will be around for the duration of the marriage, and involved in your family life. If your realtionship with them is strong, take each one out for supper or a drink, and talk to them. If your goal is to have a solid family realtionship with the inlaws, lay things on the table now in a gentle but to the point kind of way. You know they will each go back and talk to the other about the conversation, so make sure you deliver the same message to each. Seperating them will divide their power, and they won't be able to gang up on you. (siblings stick together when one is attacked regardless if they think it is wrong or right) Only do this if your relationship with the whole family is strong. You mention Father inlaw - is your fiances' Mom out of the picture? if not for gods sake don't involve her!! Mother inlaws always protect their daughters regardless if they are right or wrong. Maybe money is tight for your future sister inlaw, and she is too embarassed to say anything, or doesn't know how to tell you. Lets face it when people sign on to be part of your special day, sometimes the cost of the day escapes them- even if you do pay for some of the items as bridal gifts. If cost is an issue, set up a payment plan, and don't demand all the money at once. Have your fiance ask this question.
If the sisters are married, they will remember all to well what it is like to have an un-copperative bridal party, and if they are not chalk it up to jealousy, and poor etiquite. Are you marrying their only brother? If so, maye they think they are protecting him.
Have you mentioned any of the problems to your fiance? Don't bad mouth the sisters to him- just let him know you are having challenges with the two, and need him to step up to the plate, and help you figure out how to handle it.
You mention what they are doing, are you being over bearing? or Bossy? this can happen when planning a wedding, as all brides have a common goal- to have they perfect wedding they dreamed of growing up, and sometimes, the dream can carry the bride-to-be away, and turn her into the bridezilla she always said she wouldn't be.
Good Luck!
2007-04-09 09:30:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My honest opinion? This is just everyday stuff. They are complainers, lots of people are. This stuff is typical of a wedding, not wanting to pay, etc, it is textbook, same old same old when it comes to weddings, there is always someone like this. Are they going to come through when something really important happens in life? That is what really counts, not dresses and shoes and showers. That is small potatoes. You can't judge what they will do when you really need some serious help, just because of a wedding. It isn't that important. It is to you, it is your wedding. To other people, it isn't that crucial.
2007-04-09 09:02:24 · answer #4 · answered by danashelchan 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your future SILs sound as if they might become true pains in the future. I count my blessings that I don't have in-laws.
I wonder why SIL #2 won't cough up the money she owes you after she initially said that she would pay for her share. Is the girl cheap or is she a difficult person?
You might want to read some of the stories on a site called I Hate My In-Laws...some of the in-laws on this site are really wicked...
You can go there to post your own stories and vent, though I do hope that you won't need to.
2007-04-09 08:35:49 · answer #5 · answered by evamariehoople 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would be freaken pissed. Don't give her the shoes or the dress until she pays for them. I don't know... if you have other bridesmaids.... I would boot them out of the wedding. That's freaken crazy... why does she care if relatives stay at her father's house?? Sounds like a very very jealous situation!!
2007-04-09 08:48:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me they are being hard to get on with. Just keep it in your mind that you are going to marry their brother, not them. Just do what you have to do to make it your special day. Maybe your hubby to be should step in and say something. Whatever happens, don't let them ruin your day. Hopefully you only get married once, so it is your only chance to get your wedding right. Good luck.
2007-04-09 08:27:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I haven't really heard what you say to them or thier side of the story but they really do sound like b*****!!!!! Cheer up I've been in position and it sucks when soon to be family acts like that you just have to kill them with kindness. Good Luck and Congrats! Casey:)
2007-04-09 08:20:25 · answer #8 · answered by Casey 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well once you are married you are stuck with these people just remember that. Just realize that you will not see one cent from the sister. Good Luck
2007-04-09 08:36:59 · answer #9 · answered by Eyes of Green 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't worry you aren't marrying them.you are marrying the sister/brother. it's just for now aft that you'll only see them during festive seasons.get over it and chill.your Big day is stressfull enough don't let this bit get into you
2007-04-09 08:20:15 · answer #10 · answered by nadienia864 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋