Ok so, I have just got done with writing this poem about my one & only love Stephen A. Now, I’m not sensitive so don’t hold back your true feelings. I’ll be fine. Alright here it is.
You my love
My wonderful gift
My every thing
I give you all of me
No one else cares, but no one else cares to me
Just you & I
Baby, you’re almost too good to believe
I see in you, that you will go far
With me by your side
No lies, No fear
Just you & I baby, in this world of all kinds of possibilities
You & I, will sore with our love holding us high
Together you & I, we will make this life into something magical
We are one Hun
You are me, I am you
Love, no more nonsense
Let’s just live
Let us live this life as if it had no end
Stephen, I love you
P.s. The longer opinion the better chance you’ll have with the best answer.
Thank you for your time
bye :)
2007-03-25 19:38:28 · 13 answers · asked by Savanna 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yeah, your probably right it is more like a love letter…Well which ever you want to call it…& no, I’m not looking to publish it…just thoughts about my love…
2007-03-25 19:43:26 · update #1
Yeah, your probably right it is more like a love letter…Well which ever you want to call it…& no, I’m not looking to publish it…just thoughts about my love…
Lol, Yeah I know it is cheesy. But aye what can I say, it’s how I feel haha
2007-03-25 19:48:24 · update #2
YES people I have made a grammar mistake “S-O-A-R” I got cha !
alright next opinion please…
2007-03-25 19:56:05 · update #3
It sounds like you're really in love with this guy. Honestly, it sounds too much like every other poem I've read about love. You need to throw a little more personality into it. Pick a situation or memory you guys have together and go off it, it would make it sound a lot more meaningful than just a few corny lines put together. Not to say your poem sounds cheesy but it does.
2007-03-25 19:43:55 · answer #1 · answered by Ray90813 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The poem itself sounds like it's coming from a teenager in love for the first time, and the parents may not be to fond of the boyfriend.
This is how the teenies feel when they fall in love and not so sure about the acceptance. It is a good poem.. but you are giving too much of yourself. On the same token, it's good to write your feelings on a paper, rather than actually -totally- giving yourself to a male friend. You should pull the reins back a bit and don't hurt yourself in the long run. It can be heart breaking.
The spelling: was sore suppose to be SOAR??
2007-03-26 02:51:31 · answer #2 · answered by jcsas_2000 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I love to write poetry. Therefore, I will be suggestive. Check your grammer. Check your spelling. You have a couple of sentences which use improper grammer. Such as:"No one else cares,but no one esle cares to me just you and I."
This sentence is all wrong. Look it over again, you may find that it needs just a bit more work in those areas. otherwise its just fine. Poetry is nothing more than a mere expression of the heart. Good Luck!
2007-03-26 02:48:20 · answer #3 · answered by esteban g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, this could be turned into a song really, really easily. It almost sounds better as a song. I like it. Its really sincere. I especially like the lines "love, no more nonesense" and "live this life as if it had no end"..that would make a good chorus with some additional lines. You're a taleted author. Don't stop writing.
2007-03-26 02:42:57 · answer #4 · answered by mlove1307 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its an interesting poem, sounds like it really came from the heart. I'm sure Stephen will be flattered, I like no fear and no lie part alot, since most relationships nowadays, are full of lies so the relationship doesn't fall apart.
2007-03-26 02:44:05 · answer #5 · answered by 2Bold2Btold 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think this is a truly a beautiful poem. You take the reader inside your undying love for Stephen.
2007-03-26 02:42:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's from the heart, so in that sense it's always good. But to me there's a lack of structure. It depends though, if you're giving it to him, he'll love it. If you're wantign to get it published, you might have to work on it.
Good luck
2007-03-26 02:41:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hehe i like ur p.s. hehe
it's a very heartfelt poem/thought. the meaning is understood clearly! could use a bit of finesse/editing, but it's very heartfelt sentiment. good luck with ur love. peace
2007-03-26 02:44:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
WOW thats really good
get it copy writed
2007-03-26 02:40:58 · answer #9 · answered by AJ.JOY 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sorry to offend you, but i think it's not a poem
its like love letter.
arrange it again honey
2007-03-26 02:41:34 · answer #10 · answered by Eds 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋