My husband comes from a big family and I dont care much for them so I try to be nice but, stay away from them.. over the last year I have found out that some of his cousins when they where kids touched and and did other things to the other kids in the family and concerned because I have kids.. I never leave my kids unattened with anyone that I heard of doing this but my husband says "they where kids when this happened and it was just "exploring" all kids do it" But, I am scared! Anyone have any ideas of wha I should do? And i am afraid there are more of them that I dont know about
2007-03-25 16:23:07 · 9 answers · asked by BlondGrl 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
ALWAYS trust your "mother's intuition". If you have a gut feeling about something, go with that. You have no reason to apologize or defend your protecting your children. Yes, it might have been exploring and all of that, but why take the chance? Ask your husband if he could live with your children being abused? Something like this cannot be ignored, Good job at being a good Mommy.
2007-03-26 02:29:30 · answer #1 · answered by Melissa R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how old they were as "kids" while this exploration was taking place. Any age over 11 I'd be a little concerned; but generally, playing "doctor" among trusted playmates is within normalcy. I did it with my brother when I was about 6 (he was 4 and it was HIS idea), and I'm no child molester. Kids are curious about the physical differences between boys and girls, and when there are no opposite-sex siblings, then exploration among cousins is perfectly normal. I suggest you start looking for the good aspects of your hubby's family, and stop trying to find ways to exclude them from your family life. Kids who have cousins to play with(even if it's just one), and aunts and uncles to talk to, will feel more secure and connected to their extended families, which is good for their personal development and understanding of how society works. Whether you like your in-laws or not (barring criminality, very poor manners, sexual perversions and violence), your kids have every right to know them, and it's only fair you give them a chance to get to know your kids.
2007-03-26 00:19:33 · answer #2 · answered by Angela M 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i wouldn't risk it. it doesn't matter if they were kids and just "exploring," it's still the same. that's just saying. oh my brother raped me when we were younger, but hey, since he was just exploring, it's okay. no not at all.
if you are uncomfortable, which you are, then don't allow your children to be alone with those people whom did that to the other kids when they were younger.
and try to explain it more to your husband, and hopefully he'll get it through his head and side with you, if he is even thinking about his children's safety and best interest.
i wish you all the luck i can give.
2007-03-25 23:31:48 · answer #3 · answered by Kiri 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
B.S. Never leave your kids unattended especially around his family. It does not matter they are cousins or siblings that's not right. You should keep your foot down on your opinion and go with your gut feelings.
2007-03-25 23:33:23 · answer #4 · answered by whudafxup05 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
We have a funny uncle who was thought have touched some of my cousins, I have not let my kids near him. Why risk it?
2007-03-25 23:27:04 · answer #5 · answered by MST3K 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think you should trust you own instincts. If you think something could/may happen stay right where you can see what is going on. Try to "busy" if they want to come around your place.
2007-03-25 23:34:27 · answer #6 · answered by phylobri 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't risk it, don't do it. Only leave your children with people you are 200% confident in. Better to be ultra safe and conservative.
2007-03-25 23:32:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
if u dont feel comfortable leaving ur kids alone w.the cousins then DONT!
just be around=)
2007-03-25 23:27:00 · answer #8 · answered by Just_Me 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Keep doing what you are doing. You are their mom and you have Mothers intuition. Anytime you are uncomfortable with the situation...avoid it!
2007-03-25 23:38:09 · answer #9 · answered by Torri P 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋