what do you know..about masterbation and relationship. please help?

Question

Ok. I have a boyfriend whom I believe he love me. We have an excellent relationship, or so I would like to think. We are together about a year and 3month. we had ups and down. We travel together and we see each other very often, well for the last few weeks things were not going so well. We fight all the time he said mean stuff, then apologies later. We had issue about him and his first love, his ex girlfriend. When we met, he told me she was demanding, unappreciated and put him down always. That was the reason no longer together. Nevertheless, through our relationship I told him he cannot talk to her as I want fair chance with him. That he should forget his past or go back to it but I did not want to here anything about her. We were not talking last week. Last night he comes over my house and we enjoyed seeing each other. Yet he mentions to me that he mastered early that week twice thinking of doing e-x. Of cause I was hurt, somehow

He manages to make me understand. Then later that night we made love, so I asked him if he thought of his ex and he said yes twice. I know if I were reading this from someone else I would be shock. Is difficulty when you are the one dealing with these issues? So I refuse to talk to him, he tried to talk to me but I did not say a word. Finally the morning comes he tried to wake me up but I refuse to talk to him and simply I told him to leave. He did.
That night before all this messes he gave me a gift package, weekend gate a way from the city including massage, skis, for both of us.
This morning I got an e-mail from him saying he loves me and I should understand him! he wants to be with me, he wants to be loyalty to me and our relationship, he wishes I could just trust him and love him unconditional, regards of what happen that he needs me and he Love me very much and he does not want to be with his ex?
Please help is this ever happened to anybody? Am I being not supportive?

Answer 1

In my opinion and according to what I have read here, you are being WAY TOO supportive. You need to put your foot down. You are worth more than him making love to you while thinking of someone else. Dont let him do this to you and dont let him MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND. its called manipulation. Dont let him do this to you because you will be the only one that ends up hurt. Either he has your full attention or he gets no attention at all. Let him go, tell him to get over his ex and when he's ready he can try and talk to you again. Because obviously he's not over her and is just using you.

Answer 2

Okay, sister. Here's the scoop from someone with experience. Guys fantasize about girls all the time, girls from tv, movies, their past, etch. it doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't love you. I have learned to not ask the questions I am not prepared to get an honest answer about. My ex used to watch porn all the time on dvd, on his computer, had photos on his computer and would masturbate all the time and when I asked him about it, he of course got defensive and this made our relationship go downhill because I was not secure enough in myself or my abilities. I became paranoid and would check his phone, his emails, hit redial on the home phone and did catch him cheating. His response was it was my fault because I became neurotic about the situation. In hindsight, I can see it consumed me. I told him he couldn't talk to her, etc, and he promised not to, but I could never trust him. If it is that big of a deal for you, then rethink the relationship.
We all come into a relationship with a past, so either accept it and move forward or walk away. it's all dependent upon what you can handle.

Answer 3

Yeah i have been there.....My NOW ex had a ex who would not leave him alone and i did wonder if he ever thought of her so when she would call him or text him he would get this look like thank god she still is talking to me or something like that but i couldnt deal with it LISTEN to that song Lips of angel by hinder it will explain it all if u still want to give him a chance then be careful but i say you should leave find a real man who will love u and think of you not an ex.
Best Of Luck