ok my girlfriend and i recently broke up because of a fight we got into. I said some mean things and felt when i stormed out of her house that we were finished. Well we are truly in love and both want to get back together. I'm ready, its been a week. She says she needs some time away from me, u know like not call her or visit her for a week or at least til the weekend. Whats the point of her doing this? I know she still wants to be with me, so what is she doing? Just sorting things out in her head, teaching me a lesson by not being able to spend a lick of time with her? A big part of why we broke up was because she though I was controlling and didnt give her enough space. Is she just testing me? To see if im going to work on the things I said I was gonna work on like not calling her all the time and trusting her more.
2007-03-25 15:29:43 · 10 answers · asked by Carlos 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You were smothering her.
2007-03-25 15:32:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're g/f has some very valid concerns and you need to respect them and your relationship. Give her the time she needs to let things settle. I think the best thing you can do is to take this time to do a little thinking yourself. Don't deny the things she has spoken of but instead use this time to really give them some thought. You could start by asking yourself what you are so afraid of that makes you need to be in control of her. She is a grown woman and she chose to be with you .... understand that first and foremost.
It would be very selfish of you to push her if she's not ready to talk or see you yet and if you continue to push you will turn her feelings for you into resentment. If that happens, she's gone, no question.
She has a right to be free within your relationship , nobody wants or needs to be controlled.That is a form of abuse that can go nowhere ... it just gets worse.You really need to face whatever difficulties you're having or you will never experience a happy , healthy relationship. Better to figure it out now then go through hell on the way to the same conclusion . Good luck and take care : )
2007-03-25 15:51:37 · answer #2 · answered by uncle louie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
*Whats the point of her doing this?
She needs to clear her head. Perhaps she really was hurt by what you said and is healing. It always helps. She's mending and making things better for her. It would be best to wait for her to come back to you. If you keep on smothering her, you run the risk of her simply leaving you.
*I know she still wants to be with me, so what is she doing? She's trying to become a better person. If she really does love you and wants to be with you, she's taking this time away to become a better person for you and the relationship.
*A big part of why we broke up was because she though I was controlling and didnt give her enough space. Is she just testing me? To see if im going to work on the things I said I was gonna work on like not calling her all the time and trusting her more. -And when she says she needs space, it means this is about her, not about you. she's doing some soul-searching. And perhaps when she says she needs space, and you two have broken up, doesn't that revoke your right to be the "checking up on her every other minute" kind of boyfriend?
she may be looking for a healthier lifestyle with someone else.
I don't see the point of being in a relationship with someone who won't even give their loved one space. It simply is smothering and that's really quite unhealthy. She won't be happy in the long run.
If you really want to get back, respect her.
Come to think of it, if you really love her, you'd respect her and give her space, wouldn't you?
I hope it pans out for the best.
2007-03-25 15:44:19 · answer #3 · answered by ficklefeather 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say when you got into the fight & you broke up that you said some mean things to her. She proably got really hurt. You cant blame her for wanting to protect herself from you . She is probably afraid that you will treat her like that again.
2007-03-25 15:36:31 · answer #4 · answered by Jacqueline M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I use to tell a guy I needed space was because they were always in my face or just always around me where I could not even breath. Perhaps, you were smothering her so much that she just can't stand the site of you any longer.
2007-03-25 15:39:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You want to control her.Look at what you wrote.Stop worrying about it go out with your buddies and wait for her to call you.If you try to force this issue your gonna lose her,push her away,and really mess things up.Just do what she wants ,if you cant then your gonna try to control the situation and really screw things up.
2007-03-25 15:37:25 · answer #6 · answered by Scuba 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
carlos, you can't be that dumb, she has her eye on someone else and wants to see where it is going.your being controlling was fine for a while, how come all the sudden she doesn't like controlling, she is putting her guilt for cheating on your back, making you responsible for her actions, you drove her to it she will say. move on dude, don't wait it out, she has done made up her mind by the time she starts blaming you.
2007-03-25 15:36:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
She may need more time. When someone you love and trust hurts you, it needs time to heal. Give her some time...Write a letter. Let her know that you are truely sorry and want to be with her!
Hope I helped...
~Summer
2007-03-25 15:35:25 · answer #8 · answered by Summer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just give her her space... she might just need time to think about things and see if your really who she wants to be with..and dude try not to be so controlling
2007-03-25 15:34:51 · answer #9 · answered by Jessica Lynn! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she probably doesnt think like you man...well from my experiences...they need time to think...eh yes its very suspending but it would be worth it...give her some time because they dont have everything planned out yet
2007-03-25 15:34:57 · answer #10 · answered by redpoker777 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋