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I'm sixteen and I have been going out with this guy for three months and the other night he asked me if I was a virgin. I didn't know what to say- I want to be honest but I'm not sure myself. When I was nine I was raped. So what do I tell him? I don't want to say no and sound like I've "been around" but I don't want to say yes and lie. Am I or aren't I a virgin? what do I do?

2007-03-25 12:35:32 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

13 answers

Be honesy with him and tell him you were raped as a little girl. Im so sorry you had to go through that

2007-03-25 12:38:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I think that what he really WANTS to know is if you have chosen to sleep with someone because you have thought you were in love with him. I would answer "yes", I am a virgin. What happened to you is a very private matter, and although you think this is "forever", most of the time the relationship(s) you get into at your age fizzle out. Then you'll have people in your school and area knowing that private thing and maybe talking about it too. Keep that guarded for now. If you get engaged to be married someday, share it with your future hubby.
You are a virgin. May God bless you.

2007-03-25 19:44:34 · answer #2 · answered by royride 2 · 0 0

Girl listen to me. Im 39 and still a virgin so this is my field of expertise lol. YOu are without a doubt 100000000% a virgin.
Virginity is about sexual choice. You did not have a choice when u were raped so therefore u are a virgin and u should be proud that your a virgin. Take that to the bank!!!

2007-03-26 14:45:47 · answer #3 · answered by virgin 4 · 0 0

In this case, I'd say it's up to you. You've only been going out with this guy for 3 months so you may not trust him enough to tell him about this personal part of your life. Then again, if you're worried you may have contracted an STD and you think you may become sexually active with this new boyfriend, it's unfair to put him unknowingly at risk. Still, I think it's up to you. Some people who have been raped consider themselves virgins because they didn't agree to sex.

2007-03-25 19:43:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

from what i understand, you are only considered "deflowered" when youre no longer concidered "inpure" to be that, you must make love with the one man or woman that you are deeply in love with. Virginity is basically not having sex, its losing your innocence. If you were raped, that doesnt mean you are no longer a virgin, just means that you no longer have a cherry, im sorry for the fact that you were raped, but trust me, until you make love, youre still a virgin. so tell him the truth, if he doesnt care thats great, but if he reacts badly to it, then with all do respect the guy isnt worth it.

2007-03-27 16:13:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

First and formost, I am so sorry for what happen to you sweetie. I hope to jerk who did it is in jail, second you have only been knowing this guy for 3 months and that is way to soon to have such personal conversations. Being that it is such a touchy subject, but in all honesty babe physcially your not a virgin anymore. But emotionally you are, cause u didn't willingly give yourself to anyone. But I wouldn't talk about that just yet at least until you know for sure where this relationship is going

2007-03-25 19:43:18 · answer #6 · answered by Ms. Educated 2 · 0 0

I was also raped at a young age. but to me I was still a virgin til I was the one that chose who I wanted to be with. say your a virgin and then later down the road you can explain more.

2007-03-25 19:52:43 · answer #7 · answered by Kendra 1 · 0 0

Well your not a virgin cause you were raped..you should tell him the truth. It is better to hear it from you then from someone else. If he hears it from someone other then you..he'll figure your not being honest and might break up with you.

2007-03-25 19:42:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

the definition of a virgin is someone who has not been penetrated or engaged in sexual intercourse... so there for you could say that your still a virgin because you were forced but technically your not and you should let it be known that it was rape and it happened against your will

2007-03-25 20:05:43 · answer #9 · answered by lisa 5 · 0 0

Well if you want to keep it quiet about what happened to you then its best not to tell him because if yall break up, thats the first thing hes gonna tell everybody just to hurt you, so what i would do (im not saying you have to) is to just tell him that you are. Youre lying for a good reason so dont worry about it. And im sorry to hear what happened men are dogs.

2007-03-25 19:43:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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