Ladies........how would you respond?

Question

If you were approached by a guy, whom you never talked to before and is moderately attractive but nothing special, and he asked you out for a cup of coffee or lunch? How important is starting a dialogue before taking the plunge by asking a woman out? Any suggestions would be much appreciated.

Answer 1

Nothing tragic here but still, I would find that sort of approach a bit too direct. Why invite someone for lunch or even coffee, if you have no clue you can stand a 3 minute conversation with that person? Just have a chat first, see if that feels ok and then ask her if she fancies a coffee. Why rush? To answer your question: a nice conversation before the coffee-plunge is sort of essential to me. Failing that, well, you'll get some form of "no-thanks" for an answer.
As for the topic of the conversation, it has to flow naturally because there has to be some sort of mutual interest, whatever has sparkled that. Makes sense?

Answer 2

First off beauty is in the eye of the beholder, ....:) Also it seems like you are basing wanting to get to know this lady because of her looks. That is not all bad, as long as you can identify some common ground within the first ten minutes of talking.That is usually why most guys (and girls) talk for a bit before they decide they want to go out on a date, even if it is just for coffee. I mean you can't get a dialogue going if you don't spend a little time together. How about this....you see her and walk up to comment on her beautifully shinny hair, or sparkling eyes. She will either be flattered and find something to say or she will turn away and keep to her self. If she is interested she will give you a couple of "body clues" such as playing with her hair, smiling a lot. You should always approach these types of situations as if it makes no difference to you if she responds or not. That way you don't seem creepy or wierd. Good luck!!!

Answer 3

I would probably think he was just a weirdo, and walk off making some excuse.... nothing to do with how attractive he was, that doesn't matter. I don't know about anyone else, but being approached that way by a stranger would just be a bit scary. However I would definitely say yes to coffee, if we had spoken a few times and I felt comfortable with him.... regardless of if I was attracted to him or not.... because I think that sort of courage should be rewarded, and who knows what nice things I might discover about him over coffee.

Answer 4

That would be kind of freaky but pretty brave of the guy. Well, it depends on the guys personality. The way he looks, and how he want that look to go. Also the way he is dressed, and the way he talks to you. And very important...............HE HAS TO BE AROUND THE SAME AGE as the woman. If hes too old, then that will get really scary. You might think hes trying to do something to you. So age is really important, when your going to ask a stranger out. Well, I hope I helped. Good Luck!

Answer 5

Starting a conversation will help ease the tension and make her feel more comfortable. Humor her a bit and if she seems responsive to you, go ahead and ask her to join you for a cup of coffee or lunch. Don't forget to compliment her and act interested in what she has to say. You can start by asking her a question of some sort. Good luck!

Answer 6

It depends on the woman. Some get offended. Some don't. But don't let that stop you. Here's how my hubby won me...lol

I got asked out by some co-workers. I decided to go out and party it up in this small town (like one friggin street town). It was a weird bar as you walk down stairs to get into it. Well try this when your liquored up trying to save $...lol. This guy was standing at the bottom of the stairs on a cell phone. We looked at eachother and then I grabbed for the hand rail cos I all of a sudden thought OMG he's gonna think your a dork if you fall right now...No greetings or another look shared. Later on that night he was sitting at a table with another guy. When I went to get a round of drink for the table I would have to walk past his. He kept trying to talk to me. All he said was "Hi. How are you?" I told him where to go and how to get there and kept walking. So every time I walked by him, he would say, "Hi, how are you now?" And I'd reply with the same line and then add some comment about how he only wants down my pants...its a bar I know the deal. Finally he didn't say anything. Instead he looked at me from his chair while he grabbed another and put it infront of me. I had no choice but to sit down and talk or back track all the way around the bar with 3 drinks in my hand. So, I sat down, handed the drinks off to my table which happened to be diagonal from his table. The first thing I said was "Its all about honesty, you can't give me that F off now!" He replied with hey, I just want to talk to you. You look like you can hold a decent conversation, that's all." this floored me as he wasn't expressing any vibes of I just want you now. We've been together ever since. So dude, play it cool and follow your gut (so long as its not telling you to be a stalker...lol) Good Luck!

Answer 7

if i was a guy i would not ask for another date right off the bat. this is what i would suggest -- if you go and talk to a woman for the first time see how well you both communicated first. check if you made her laugh and if she would touch your arm or hand every now and then. that shows that she may be interested. once the end of the night would come i would suggest you say "so maybe we should do this again sometime?" and she what she says. if she does not say yeah here is my number then ask her for it! good luck!

Answer 8

Well, I guess I am a little more guttsy that most so far. Very possibly, yes. If there was a facility near by that served coffee and food, if there was any kind of spark, if the guy was dressed decent (in my opinion), if the guy was clean, if I had the time, My answer would probably be "ok". or "sure, why not".
Just me.

Answer 9

I'd like a little conversation first. If we don't talk and he just asks me out, I'd think he was shallow because he doesn't know anything about me and the only thing he's seen is how I look and he's asking me out.
I'm not saying we have to have a half hour conversation about our lives, but it'd be nice to exchange names and some facts/interests that we have before just being asked out.
Have a wonderful day!

Answer 10

I would rather a guy start a conversation w/ me before asking me out. He'd seem too eager if he just jumped right on that question. Then it'd be best if you gave her your number. Some girls don't like to give out their number to strangers. And to meet in a public place for the first few dates or so.