Ok so I have a Friend ... She is dating this guy that she knew that I really like... should I be mad, sad or supportive and why should I feel that way? Do I have a choice to be mad??? Becuase I feel like i have no choice to be.
Thanks
2007-03-25 05:49:23 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
we cant help you. Only you can do this.
Fight for or leave.
...................................
2007-03-25 05:52:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 2⤋
You have every right be a little mad and hurt since she knew that you liked him. But you also have to think about her, does she like him just as much as you do? Did he know that you liked him? Tell your friend how you feel, let her know that she hurt you with her decision to date this boy, and tell her that you can try and be supportive, but it will be hard and that you may not be able to. If she is a good friend then she should understand. Either way, more than likely their relationship probably wont last forever, do you really want to lose a friend over some boy? On the other hand if she is dating him just because you like him (personal experience), you need to get rid of her because she is not a friend. Hope this helped.
2007-03-25 06:03:25 · answer #2 · answered by Lulu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ive been on both ends of this situation and here's the most helpful advice you can get: " if you want to keep this friend and keep the same closeness you have, do NOT get mad" because you will never be the same again if you do. It's pointless fighting over ONE guy when there are more than Billions of them in the ENTIRE world. And your friend and you both have the right to like whoever you want, just because it happens to be the same person doesn't mean that the friend who has him is breaking some kind of GIRL RULE. so don't get mad, but sadness comes with it no matter what, if your sad don't show it, show your support for your friend and that your not shallow or bitchy, that you can be a friend even when a guy comes between you. Boys are boys, but you girls will be friends forever and that's what see needs to hear from you, not only in words but in actions. Stay with your friend, cause life without her will be much harder than without the guy.
2007-03-25 05:55:50 · answer #3 · answered by chelsyrox1010 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she knew, than she had no right to hurt you like that. You could be mad, but it won't help if you don't confront her. Calmly talk to her, and tell her that it hurt you when she started dating a guy she knew she liked. Tell her that you would never date a guy if you knew she liked him. See how she reacts.
At this point, it's up to you on how to feel. you could be supportive, but it was still wrong of her to act like that. If she doesn't consider your feelings, than she's not a true friend. Gradually start spending less time with her - don't make drama, and you will be the better person.
2007-03-25 05:54:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only you know if she is doing this to one-up you. If she is, you should try to not be mad, but you should also move away from her as a trusted friend. In that case it would seem to me that she has personal issues of inferiority in your regard and that will always cause you problems.
If she is dating him because she truly likes him and he likes her, and not you, then it's just the way it is and being mad at her makes you the one with the issues.
So, the BEST answer is clear, you are the only one who knows whether you should be mad at her or not.
2007-03-25 06:28:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd talk to your friend about it, make sure you both have an understanding about whats happening with both of you. I'd be supportive, even if you didnt feel like you should be. Of course you could be mad, but i dont think that would help anyone. if you REALLY thought this guy was the guy, then you might want to do something, but if he's just a crush, i'd say wait it out, it might not work out bewteen him and your friend.
2007-03-25 05:54:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well to tell u the truth if she was ur friend she wouldn't be dating that guy
so rethink were this friendship is going
u have the right to be mad because she knew that u liked this guy so u have the right to be mad at her
things like this happen alot
go tell her how u feel and if she just says its ur problem then stop being friends with her
but its just a guy so if she is ur best friend dont loose a friendship oveer a guy
guys will come and go but friend are forever
2007-03-25 06:02:25 · answer #7 · answered by Isis 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal, I think to feel mad - and jealous too... but this person liked her obviously as well, or they wouldn't be dating. Sometimes things don't work out in love, but I would hardly say you should ruin the relationship over it.
I would talk to her, honestly, and let her know that in going after him, that it did hurt your feelings. But after that, I would do what I could to let it go and move on. You may need some distance, to get over it, but if you and this guy were meant to be together, he probably wouldn't with her.
Don't begrudge her for happiness. And don't lose out on a friendship, that may be worth saving, by bottling up your emotions about it.
2007-03-25 05:55:06 · answer #8 · answered by Willalee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should be supportive. Your friend will last longer than any lover (in most cases)...so you should respect her happiness. Yeah, it can really be hard if you like the guy too...but just be happy for her, and move on. You'll have other chances.
You *do* have a choice. Why be mad at her for being happy? Wouldn't you rather she be supportive of you with a new boyfriend as opposed to her trying to undermine her relationship?
It's natural to be jealous...particularly if you really wanted that person to be yours....but it's sometimes necessary to swallow your pride, and move on.
2007-03-25 05:53:51 · answer #9 · answered by wintermuteprime 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ok well i have been in the same situation. i learned that if she knows you like him and is dating him anyways then there is no way she's going to stop dating him. being mad is kindof normal but what i did was i was mad and upset so i cried and moved on. i realized a guy wasnt worth losing a friend. you dont have to support it but dont ruin it either. i hope this helps u.
2007-03-25 05:56:48 · answer #10 · answered by Paige 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You always have a choice to be mad or not. You have a choice to get over it and move on. You also have a choice when it comes to friends, and this one sounds like she doesn't have your best interests at heart. If you keep her as a friend, you've got to remember that you can't trust her!
2007-03-25 05:53:13 · answer #11 · answered by Bad Kitty! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋