Question about people being rude and obnoxious.?

Question

I am neither trying to be judgemental nor condescending here. But I really am interested to know if there's a scientific reason to why certain people seem more... rude and obnoxious than others?

I just came home from a meeting this afternoon, where an executive stepped in 20 minutes late (he's rather high-ranked), and the following 2 hours were filled with his rants. He always over steps his boundaries and makes extremely crude and rude remarks. While the rest of us keeps quite during the whole time, we were silently exchaning glances at him.

Is there perhaps a reason than certain people in the society seem less 'in tune' with themselves? To a certain extent, it appears that they are unaware how they come across to others.

Perhaps there's an explanation in the subject of psychology? Or a scientific explanation, eg hormones or certain genes controlling tendency to erratic behaviours?

I am extremely interested in this phenomenon and would appreciate any comments/thoughts.

Also I'd appreciate if you could attach a source, a quote, eg from a textbook or reference book or from a website, etc.

Thanks again!

Hmm... queit a few sound comments already so far. I have actually read in a medical article, where a Russian scientist labeled human being as a race into a few groups, some born with a natural tendency to want to lead, some to follow, some are in between. In another example, some with extremely compulsive behaviour, some mild, some in between. Which was explained by different rates of different people secreting and releasing of some excitatory hormones like adrenaline, vasocontrictors and so forth. It was a physician named Pavlov if I wasn't mistaken.

How about psychologically? Perhaps some people are linked to a more... possesive behaviour while others are more mild and mellow? Perhaps a certain locus of the brain which regulates these behaviours?

Answer 1

This executive you are talking about sounds like he has a personality disorder. You asked for a source. I don't have any scientific references to go by. I just have to continue to deal with my ex-husband due to his constantly inappropriate and hurtful behavior. He was diagnosed with a borderline personality disorder during the court ordered psychological evaluation that we were both ordered to take during our custody trial for our children. My psych eval came back normal while his showed a personality disorder. He is very controlling and manipulative and always has to run the show, dominate conversations and be the center of attention. He simply does not "get it" how he comes across to others. The executive you mentioned fits this same profile.

Answer 2

I think it is just how they were raised and what they were exposed to as children. You don't often see a "loud and obnoxious" person from a quiet and reserved family. It can also have a lot to do with their position or rank in life. Do they feel the unnecessary need to constantly remind people of their superiority through remarks that "only important people can make without being reprimanded"? Or perhaps they are extremely insecure and feel the need to over do what they say so that they make themselves feel important. Like you said, the remarks were crude and rude, so he was most likely putting someone or something down because he either wants to fit in, or make himself feel better. Those kinds of people are just bullies that console themselves by causing pain to others. Best of luck working for someone like that.

Answer 3

In college, our psychology class addressed this very topic.
After a full month of research, our conclusions were quite
enlightening.
Rude (obnoxious) people are basically greedy, self-serving,
and SELF-important. Those people "strut" around, feeling
they can do no wrong, so they walk over everybody they can.
They think nobody can bring them down, so they force others
to serve only them. THEY ARE UNGRATEFUL AND THANK-
LESS!! Their attitude about their own worth, is grossly
over-rated, giving them a false sense of ego mania. Their
attitude can only be changed when someone in authority over
them removes them from office or severely demotes them.
They abruptly wake up to a "reality check".

Answer 4

I don't really think its genetic. I think it has to do with the persons childhood, and self esteem. They might have been brought up thinking that the things you think are rude are fine. My little step-brothers have been tought that picking your nose is perfectly fine. I think its disgusting, and they do it in public constantly. It really bugs. It also might depend on the persons self esteem. Some people think that being crude and rude sends a message of "power" or "toughness." It truly is unfortunate when we run into someone who offends us, but I really don't think we are born to be rude.

Answer 5

We are a product of our environment. How your parents treat you is a good indication of how you will treat others. If you are raised in a home where nobody has respect for fellow human beings, you will most likely follow that same path. If you are shown compassion and understanding in your childhood, this is a quality that will most likely show itself in the way you treat others as well.

Answer 6

I think that just the way some people are. I mean there's no way in the world everybody is going to be polite. And most people take kindness for weakness for some strange reason.

Answer 7

Well, I tend to get a little obnoxious and sometimes rude without even realising it. My mother can be that way... Sometimes it's just how you were raised... It could also be based on comfort level. I'm only that way when I've hit my zone and feel confident.

Answer 8

Apart from what you have stated, I would quote from my experience that people react violently because of their past bitter experiences to reflect their distaste and protest. Otherwise if given a patient hearing and consolation, they turn normal and behave nicely later on.

Answer 9

Perhaps you are looking at it the wrong way. You are trying to place blame on someone else......the one perceived to be rude or obnoxious. What about the person who thinks someone is rude? Perhaps they are just too sensitive?

Answer 10

Those kind of people are highly insecure. It's hard to be the big guy on top.